Valentine's Day
February 14th had come yet again, and little Johnny was feeling . . well . . just a little left out at Sunset Elementary today. He had no significant other to celebrate this day with, and it feels gosh darn awkward whenever meeting one that it just . . doesn't ever seem to work out. Little Johnny was walking down the hallway with his head down when he stumbled into a note jetting from his locker. "What? there's something for me?" Johnny said, his voice cheering up, as he pulled the note out of his locker and looked at it, the cover read: To: Johnny, From: Your secret admirer. "Wow! I have a secret admirer? Yeah that makes sense! I'm way too weird for her to be public about it! Ah-ha, well yeah, let's see what she has to say!" Little Johnny excitedly pulled the line paper out of the envelope and it read: Dear Johnny, come to the middle of the dark forest if you want to find out who I am. Happy Valentines Day3. Johnny's hands, trembling with excitement, hurriedly folded the note and tucked it away as he darted off to the forest. Briskly galloping through the trees, a golden ticket to love in Johnny's pocket, nothing was going to get him down. It could be the ugliest urchin to face the earth and yet Johnny would not care, because it's the only person who's ever written a note for him. Even his parents had already orphaned him before, thinking he'd never learn to read . . But low and behold, he's made it this far to read his first love note. Little Johnny breached an arc of trees, stumbling into an open glade with a shadowy figure kneeling down in the middle. "Hey! I'm here. I got your note!" Johnny shouted, as the figure remained stoic and silent. "It's okay if you don't want to talk, I know small talk can be a hassle, heh" Johnny approached the figure and kneeled down next to her, observing her cloaked head staring at the floor. "Hey," said Johnny, "Can I see your face? I'm not gonna judge you or anything I promise." Johnny reached his hand out and began lifting up the cloak . . until he could almost see her fac+- Batman rips off the cloak, grabs little Johnny by the throat and raises him into the air. "What? What is going- UhHH!" Johnny squealed as he gasped for air, Batman's iron grip crushing into his neck. Batman whips his arm out, launching Johhny. "AH!" Johnny yells as his back slams into a tree, before rolling across the ground whimpering. Batman walks up to Johnny and and grabs his hand "Please . . please no" Johnny begs as Batman drags him over to a tree and lays his back against it. "Why do you want me?" Johnny mutters as Batman ties his hands behind the tree and spreads his legs open. Batman rears his right leg back, preparing to kick, "No . . I'll do anything . . no . . NO! . . NAHHHHH!" Johnny screamed as Batman drove his foot deep into his crotch, shattering his tailbone and imploding his testicles. Johnny began sobbing and screaming as Batman began to grin. Batman picks Johnny up by the neck and chokeslams him face first, Johnny let out a pathetic yelp as he went hitting the floor. Batman pulls down little Johnny's pants before reaching as deeply as he can into his pocket and slowly pulling something out. Ever so slowly and outward comes the large bulbous turgid green body of a cactus lined with jagged red prickles . . "W- What are you going to do with that?" Little Johnny shakenly ushered. "I'm going to deliver justice" Batman said. Batman plunged the cactus deep down into little Johnny's ass hole. Cries of agony filled the air as Johnny felt the myriad of red stinging needles penetrating into the inner lining of his large intestine and pushed deeply by the bulbousness of the cactus. "WHYY? WHYY? AHHHHHH!FUUUUCKKKK" Johnny screamed, writhing in agony. Batman nodded in approval as Johnny passed out from the shock. "Whew," Batman dusted his hands off and checked another one off the list before continuing along his way.
THE END