A/N: I wanna thank Matthew, for inspiring me to write
this. Te quiero demasiado. And I also wanna thank James Cameron and Charles
Eglee, for creating Dark Angel, which was also another source of inspiration
for this piece. It's mine and ya can't steal it!!!
Desperation
Desperation.
To wake up and to realize
the space
next to you, in bed, is empty.
To turn around to cold empty sheets
and hush the clock and see "no him".
Desperation.
To feel the cold air in the morning
as you walk to take a shower
and not have someone pull
you back to bed...
Desperation.
To wash your back
and not be able to reach
without pulling a muscle.
Desperation.
To have cold water hitting your face
and feel as cold as the
cold death.
Desperation.
To pretend you're being loved
against the blue tiles
and pretend you're being
loved
in the morning light.
Desperation
To not share your coffey
or share your morning joy,
or grunt an: "gotta jet...to work I must".
Desperation.
To go through the day
not looking forward to be home
only to find space, cold,
loneliness.
No arms around you, no heart pounding.
No smile to warm your soul
no comfort in loving words.
Desperation.
To eat without hunger.
To breathe without needing oxygen.
To rest without being
tired.
To go back to that same bed
that tortured you in the morning
with it's cold sheets, wide space, big pillows.