This is gonna be very fun to write… *smiles evilly* Oh, how I miss the Reuben character. He needs to show up at least one more time before iCarly ends!

DISCLAIMER: I just wasted two of your most precious seconds.

Chapter 1: Freddie's POV

I should've known from the start that this would spiral out of control, because even the simplest things in life seem to.

I should've known that I would get hurt, with Sam I always get hurt. But this time it was my heart that took the punch, not my arm or shoulder.

I've been trying to convince myself not to do this for days, but I have to. The secret is burning up inside of me, I have to tell someone. Might as well tell the girl the secret involves.

And what is this secret, you say? Only the fact that I'm in love with the girl who hates me. That's right I love Sam Puckett. How? I have no idea. I guess that it's her flowing golden curls, and her-

Snap out of it, Freddie! Ugh, this being in love thing is hard.

Today is Thursday, and Sam always goes to school early on Thursdays. WHAT? Sam goes to school early? Yup. She goes at 7:30 instead of just showing up at 9:30. Thursday is fried chicken day at the cafeteria, so Sam sneaks in there to eat some.

If Sam is going to school early, then so am I. My plan is to catch her at her locker and tell her how I feel. That way I still have some time to go to the nurse in case she hurts me.

I walked into the quiet halls of Ridgeway; it was strange being the only one here. Wait, there goes Phil Clevis, but he always shows up an hour early to school to see if his teachers can give him the homework for the next couple of days. He's an even bigger try-hard then me!

I rounded the corner to my locker, and I saw a small figure sprint past me. What the hell was that? ! I shook my head and opened my locker, taking out the books I needed for today. It was already almost 7:40, where's Sam?

And she didn't show up until 8:00, along with Carly.

"Hey, Freddie."Carly greeted as she walked over to her locker.

"Hi," I murmured. I turned to Sam, who was spinning the lock on her locker. "Don't you always get here early on Thursdays?" Now when am I supposed to tell her how I feel?

Sam gave me a strange look. Oh great, I probably just sounded like a stalker! "Yeah, but I didn't feel like it today. Besides, Carly has fried chicken at her house." She told me as she opened her locker. All of a sudden, something fell out of it.

"What's this?" Sam mumbled, picking it up. It was an envelope with Sam scribbled on the front.

She opened it and scanned through the writing.

"What the hell?" Sam laughed. "This doesn't make any sense at all! Must be a prank."

"What does it say?" I asked.

Sam handed me the note and I read it. Huh? Wait a second, this sounds familiar…

"There's my raspberry soccerball!"

Oh shit. It's Reuben.

Reuben has sort of "disappeared" these past couple of years. There were rumors spreading that he was in a mental hospital or that he moved the Texas to raise cattle.

He still looks exactly the same. His voice isn't even deeper! At least I developed.

I snapped back into reality when I heard Sam groan. "Reuben? Why the hell are you here? Wait… you wrote this letter, didn't you?" Sam asked, referring to the piece of paper I was holding.

Reuben smiled and nodded. No wonder I had no idea what the letter said, it was in Reubenese.

Gibby walked up. "Hey guys! Isn't it great that Rueben's back?"

Carly, Sam, and I just nodded weakly.

"I'm ready to pinch the starfish, if ya know what I'm saying!" Reuben exclaimed.

"Sweet!" Gibby cried, giving him a high five.

As Reuben walked off to class, Sam handed Gibby the letter. "What does this say?" She asked.

Just so you know, the letter said:

My raspberry soccerball,

The turtles are singing with the peanut butter ice cream! I would like to tickle your feet with pasta.

"It says, 'My girlfriend, I have finally returned! I would like to go on a date with you.'" Gibby announced.

"Gross, I am NOT his girlfriend!" Sam yelled.

I felt the little green monster start to churn in my stomach. It's just Reuben, there's nothing to be jealous of…

"Where has he been all these years, anyway?" Carly asked.

"His parents sent him to a mental hospital. They couldn't stand how he spoke his own language and they thought he was mentally insane. But none of the treatments worked, so they just decided to let him grow out of it." Gibby informed us.

Sam scoffed. "That kid is gonna need to go to a real hospital if he wants to go on a date with me!" With that, she stormed down the hallway towards her first class.

"Oh boy." Carly sighed. "This isn't going to turn out well."

Gibby shrugged. "Reuben will charm his way into it. Just watch."

He better not.

Sam would never go on a date with Reuben… would she?

A/N: Hahaha, I love writing Reuben's character. I hope he sounds realistic. I'm not really happy with the way this turned out, but whatever.

And sorry this was so short, it's just the intro.

Oh, and I don't see this story being very long. Maybe 5 chapters at most? Just to let you guys know.

Review, or Reuben will come to your house and tickle your feet with pasta! xD

PS: I would appriciate it if you guys voted on the poll on my profile. :)