To the Dentist

"Oww!" Ed said as he felt at his teeth.

"What's wrong brother?" Al asked.

"I was eating this rock and I felt an intense surge of pain throughout my jaw," Ed said while still feeling at his teeth.

"Were you actually trying to eat a rock?"

"Yeah! It looked tasty!"

"How did it taste?" Al asked, " Wait why do I care? We should take you to the dentist!"

"Hell no!"

"Why? If you don't go your teeth will just rot out of your head."

"Says you!" Ed yelled while running away from Al.

After capturing Ed and using his overly useful sedative, Al began to carry Ed to the nearest Dentist. Al counted the random kitties sprawled throughout the city and unfortunately forgot his original intentions. Soon Al found himself in a very dark and secluded alleyway.

"Dang it! If only I had a gps." Al exclaimed while continuing through the alleyway. Soon he heard a scream coming from the end of the dark, long, secluded alleyway. "Oh no it sounds like someone is in trouble! I better help them." Al said as he dropped his unconscious brother on the hard pavement. After he rounded the corner Al saw that some man was attacking some poor girl. After round-house kicking, punching, and ultimately destroying the villain, Al looked toward the girl. "Are you okay?" Al said.

"Yes" Said the girl, who looked very funky because she is an unimportant filler character. "Who are you?"

"I'm A-"

"Al! Why the hell did you leave me here!" Ed yelled as he kicked Al in the head.

"I came to help her." Al said as he pointed towards the girl.

Ed looked at the funky looking girl. "Who are you?"

"I'm Zahnarzt Hater"

"Uhhh. What does that mean?" Ed said while looking at the funky looking girl.

"It means dentist hater. Why is that my name you ask? I'll tell why."

"Do I look like I care?"

"Of course you do. Now back to my story."

"You never started."

"Well you didn't let her brother." Said Al.

Zahnarzt began her story, "It all started with my grandfather. He owned a candy store. His business was very prosperous for many years, until..."

"Until what?" Al said while obviously enjoying the story.

"A dentist opened up next door. The dentist was evil. He told the kids in the area that candy would rot their teeth. What a liar. When my father began to have problems paying off the rent, the dentist offered to buy my grandfathers business. My grandfather hastily excepted. Afterwards the dentist forced my grandfather and his family to have monthly check-ups because my grandfather still owed money. But it doesn't stop there! My father opened a soda shop when he became old enough. And guess what! The dentist son opened up next door to him. That's where the story ends. It's my destiny to destroy the dentist shop before my father follows his fathers path."

"That was such a-" Al began.

"Boring story!" Ed yelled.

"Well I doubt you have a more interesting life," The girl said while pointing at Ed, "midget."

"What did you say?!" Ed said while glaring at Zahnarzt.

"What you didn't hear me? I said midg-" Zahnarzt began to say.

"No, stop!" Al yelled while holding his brother back.

"Who are you calling so short that they could drown in the Cool aid man!?" Ed yelled while flailing his arms uncontrollably. "Al let me go! I need to pummel her into the ground!"

"Hey, do you want to help me with this next mission?" said Zahnarzt

"You just insulted me and your asking for help!"

"I can pay."

"I don't need money, and I doubt you have anything worth trading."

"I have this." Zahnarzt held up a shiny red rock.

"We'll help!" Ed quikly said, "but first you have to let me inspect that rock."

"Of course not! You may steal it." Zahnarzt said while stuffing the rock in her bra. "Let's see you take it now little man!"

"Fine. I wont take it, but if I help you then I better get that."

"Fine with me."

Zahnarzt took the brothers out of the alley and began to head towards the dentist office.

"By the way, who was that dude who attacked you?" Al asked in attempt to end the awkward silence.

"Who cares. This is a filler remember. He'll pop up again later and turn out to be the main bad guy or something." Zahnarzt said.

"Oh, yeah."

Not much later the group of heroes approached the Dentist office.

"Okay I'll explain the mission."

"Well it's about time you stupid whore!" Ed exclaimed.

"We are going to sneak into the dentist office and take the dentist's tools."

"How are we going to do that?"

"This is his lunch brake."

After carefully explaining her well thought out plan, the three began to take action.

"Okay Al you know what to do right?" Ed asked

"Yep." Al said while walking towards the door. After bashing his hands through the door, Al ripped it off.

"Step one, make a hard to spot entrance. Check!" Zahnarzt exclaimed. "On to step two. Sneak past the security system"

"This is a dentist office! There isn't a security system!" Ed yelled.

"Step three, take the loot."

"Finally...hey wait, wont I get discharged for this?"

"Of course not! Fillers are non-cannon remember?"

"Oh yeah."

"Now you take the stuff. I'll be look-out."

"What ever."

Al was still sitting outside of the dentist office, petting one of the kittens that he had found just recently.

"What the!" Yelled a very suspicious man.

"Hello."

"Did you do this to my dentist office."

"Oh I remember you! I beat you up back in the alleyway remember?" Al said.

"So it was you!" The man pointed at Al.

"Uhhh...no I didn't do it. When I got here it was already like this. I swear!"

"I'll deal with you later." the dentist said as he walked into his office.

"Hide!" Zahnartz said to Ed while she scurried towards a conveniently placed box.

"What was that?" Ed asked before he felt a warm hand touch his shoulder.

"I see that you have snuck into my office, brat!" said the dentist.

Ed turned around while dropping a bunch of junk onto the floor. "Uhhhh...no...you see, I was jus-"

"Enough" The man began to smile, "you shall be punished severely!"

"No thank you."

The dentist used a conveniently placed sedative.
_____________________________________________________________________________________________

Ed woke up a few hours later with his mouth filled with gauze.

"Owww...wad appent" Ed said while holding his face.

"The dentist found you in his office and decided to give you a free check up, oh and he pulled that tooth that you broke."

"Owww..."

"But guess what?"

"Wad?"

"Zahnarzt decided to pay us anyways!"

"Led me zee da stone"

"Here ya go." Al said while putting the red rock in Ed's hands.

Ed pulled the gauze out of his mouth. "Lets try to transmute with it! This will decide if it's real." After saying this Ed pulled a kitten out of Al and tried to transmute it into a piece of gold. There was no response. "Dang it. That whore gave us a fake."

"Well she never said that it was the philosopher's stone."

"Then what is it? A ruby?" Ed said as he randomly licked the stone. "It's frozen red soda! I wasted all of that time for frozen soda!"

"Don't worry brother. We'll have plenty more pointless fillers. We're bound to find a stone in at least one of them."

End of Filler 1

This project isn't as important to me as the others so I won't be updating it as often, but that doesn't mean that i've abandoned it.