Playing Five Year Old

I sat on the floor of Deidara's apartment using his "art", as he would call them, as action figures when suddenly my stomach growled, very loudly. 'Dei, hired me to house sit.' I thought, 'So he probably wouldn't mind if, I raided his fridge.'

I stood and brushed off my pants and made my way to the kitchen. When I opened the refrigerator door all I saw was cheap grocery store sushi and a half-full bottle of soy sauce. 'Of course keep all the good stuff to yourself, why don't you Deidara."

I slammed the door hoping to break something, because Dei loved to make me mad with any kind of seafood.

Even though I now know my parents lied to me, by saying my pet fish "ran away" I still get this awful feeling that I might be eating him.

So giving up on the idea food I went back to what my older brother would call "playing five year old" on the floor with Dei's mini versions of his sculptures. After a few minutes of being a five year old again, 'CRACK!' The head of one of the sculptures broke off in my hand.

'Oh God!' I thought as I quickly tried to reattach the head to the body and after a few failed attempts I decided to use packing tape because 1) its clear and 2) it would be harder to notice. Right?

Quickly returning the sculptures to their shelves, I sat on the couch knowing Deidara would be returning at any moment.

Hearing foot steps down the hall I turned on the TV guessing Dei would walk though the door but instead the doorbell rang. 'Who on earth would be coming to Dei's apartment?' I asked myself as I walked towards the door.

"Ichiraku Ramen Delivery, for Deidara. One extra large bowl with everything." I heard a guy say on the other side of the door soon followed by the sound of my stomach.

"Thank you." I said to the heavens, and then opened the door, "I'm Deidara. Now, remind me how much it was again."

The delivery guy looked down at his notepad, "Um…actually it's already paid for, due to your families ramen account at the bank. Enjoy." He said handing me the bowl and then leaving.

"Oh yeah! Dei's an Uzumaki!" I laughed as I slammed the door shut with my foot and headed to the kitchen, "Well, Itadakimasu!" I said as I dugin.

After finishing the ramen I decided it was a good time to leave, knowing that Dei only ordered ramen when he was on his way home.

The front door was out of the question of escape so I decided that the fire escape would be a safest bet.

Opening the window slowly then carefully stepping onto the old rusted metal of the fire escape I stupidly left the window open, before I started my decent.

When I was a few floors down from Dei's window, I heard the window open then closely followed by the voice of the angered blond artist, "MADARA!" I laughed and, foolishly, looked up and made eye-contact with him. Looking down I quickly noted that it wasn't to far to the ground, so pushing myself away from the ladder I jumped as I started to hear the sound of creaking metal above me knowing the blond was on my tail.

Once I crossed the street I thought I was home free, but boy was I wrong, the angered blond was chasing me with the fire of anger surrounding him. Reaching the corner I found my solution. I hoped.

"HIDAN!" I yelled to the silver haired man standing on a box on the sidewalk.

He looked way a large black book in his hands, "Yes? What is it Madara?" he asked as I came to a stop in front of him trying to catch my breath.

"I need some help, you see Deidara is on my tail and-"

He stopped me mid-sentence and nodded that he would help. 'You gotta love corner evangelists.' I thought as I nodded in thanks and started running again.

Not long after I met with Hidan I ran into Sasori and his girlfriend Sakura. I knew Sasori from college we had a few classes together and we annoyed each other to no end.

"Hey isn't that Madara?" I heard the pink haired girl ask to her puppet loving boyfriend.

"Yeah, but let's not get involved." He replied to her trying to pull her away.

I couldn't help myself I had to get them involved, "YO SASORI! SUP DAWG!"

The red head sighed "What do you want Madara?" he asked annoyed.

"What I can't just hang with my home boi?" I asked.

Sasori put his hand on his forehead and sighed, "One whenever I see you, you need me to do something, and two stop trying to talk like a gangster."

"So?"

He sighed again, "What do I have to do?"

I laughed, "Thanks Sasori, OK so there's this guy named Deidara chasing me and I need you to distract him for me."

"Fine."

I thanked him once again and started to run. I had made it to the end of the block when Deidara finally caught up to me.

"MADARA!" he said angrily from behind me. I turned around to see the blond bend over with his hands on his knees catching his breath.

I laughed, "Come on Dei it was just ramen what the big deal?"

He shot me an evil glare and stood up straight "JUST RAMEN! It's not just ramen! That was my comfort ramen because I've had a really bad day because Ino blackmailed me into joining her stupid show and the director thought I was a girl and the directors SON is obsessed with symmetry and Naruto came in and started laughing because my speech habit started acting up and some redheaded jerk on the street was driving me NUTS and I found he was Sakura's new BOYFRIEND and I got stopped on the street TWICE by some weirdo who kept trying to throw BIBLES at my head! So I've just had a really, really bad day today, OKAY? And that ramen was the ONLY THING I had to look forward to!"

"Dei you get Ichiraku everyday." I said to the fuming blond.

"It's expensive…And yummy…I wanted to eat it." He said as took a step closer to me.

"You don't even have to pay for it." I said as I started to step backwards only to have him keep walking toward me.

"It a lot of money….It nummy….You ate….You MEANIE!" he said as he stopped walking in my general direction as his eye started to twitch rapidly and seemed as if he was taking one too many control classes with Vegeta for it looked as if he was about to go super saiyan.

Then Deidara Steve Yamanaka Uzumaki got the shock of his life.