Disclaimer: I don't own the copyrights to Gundam. I asked Santa for them for Christmas, but I have a feeling all I'll get is coal.
A/N: Merry Christmas Everyone! I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season. Kristen, thanks for putting up with the numerous revisions of this story, you're the best! Credit for the title all goes to Lara_Winner, thanks for helping me get past the mental block on the name for this fic.
Dedication: To anyone who has ever lost or walked away from true love, here's hoping that one day it will find its way back to you.
****************
You are cordially invited
To the 21st Birthday Party
For Mr. Quatre Raberba Winner
On the 13th day of May AC 201
The party will be held at
The Winner Residence on L4
Please RSVP by 02 April AC 201
****************
"How many times do I have to tell you, Anka? I. AM. NOT. GOING!" Hilde threw her hands down in frustration as she argued with her sorority sister.
Anka looked up from her magazine, an amused look played across her face. "Hilde, you've been keeping secrets from us for the past three years."
The petite redhead lounging on the bed, chimed in. "You never told us that you knew Quatre Winner. The heir to the biggest fortune in the entire universe."
"It must have slipped my mind, Gwen." Hilde said as she plopped down the chair sitting in front of her desk. 'Who could have thought that one little invitation would cause this much chaos?' Placing her elbows on her knees, she rested her chin in her cupped hands.
For the past three years, she had been living in the Omega Beta Zeta house on the campus of the Freie Universitat Berlin. Here she had found the sisters that she had always dreamed about. The ones you could gossip with, the ones who always had a shoulder to cry on, the ones that would sit with you, eat ice cream and watch sappy love stories.
But in a matter of two weeks, she would be thrown out in the real world again, and she wasn't looking forward to it one bit.
Dragged from her thoughts, she found a pair of emerald greens eyes and one of cooper brown staring directly at her. Hilde sighed and smiled slightly. "Even if I wanted to go, I have finals in two weeks and graduation shortly after. I have no time to attend fancy parties, when I my life hangs in the balance of those tests."
Gwen pushed herself up into a seated position. "Stop being so melodramatic, Hilde. You've got a 4.0 G.P.A; all your professors love you. Hell, you're even graduating a year earlier than the rest of us. You need to enjoy life, not spend it buried in textbooks."
'You guys don't know how much of life I've experienced in my 20 years.' The thought came to Hilde's mind but never escaped her lips. Some secrets were best kept swept under rugs.
Tossing her blond hair, Anka added, "Besides we already sent your RSVP."
Hilde stared at her friend, her mouth slightly open. Anka laughed at the comical look on her best friends face. "Hilde, you better close your mouth or you're liable to catch flies."
Regaining her composure, she sent Anka a narrowed look. "How could you do that to me?" Quickly stalking across the room, Hilde moved over to the vid-phone. "I'll just have to call Quatre and explain to him that I'm not able to make it because . . . because I don't have the money. Yea, that's it!"
Before she could begin to place the call, Gwen cleared her throat. "I'm afraid that won't work." Reaching into the top drawer of her night side, Gwen withdrew an envelope and walked over to Hilde. "You see, Quatre already made arrangements for your travel." Placing the envelope in Hilde's open palm, Gwen retreated back to her side of the room, not wanting to take the full force of her friends temper.
Hilde pulled out the tickets and itinerary and looked at them through misty eyes. Her heart and her brain had been at constant odds since the invitation arrived in the mail. It seemed that her friends had been the deciding factor. 'Always count on your friends to either get you out of messes, or put you right in the middle of them.'
Blinking a couple of times, her vision cleared and Hilde took her first long look at the agenda. The color drained from her face as she quickly brought her head up. "I leave tomorrow?!" Hilde began to panic. "I have nothing to wear to a formal function like this! Where am I going to find a dress at the last minute?"
Gwen and Anka looked at each other with huge bright smiles. "SHOPPING TRIP!!" Pulling Hilde out of the chair, Anka headed for the door, while Gwen grabbed their purses and the car keys.
****************
A couple hundred dollars poorer and one dress richer, Hilde stood on the jet-way casting her friends an apprehensive look and a tentative wave. As she watched the jet-way pull away from the docking area, he subconsciously tightened her grip on her garment bag. She felt like a little girl, going on her first trip away from home; scared and uncertain.
Sighing, Hilde turned away from the closed doors that lead to the space dock and sluggishly moved toward the shuttle. Due to her despondency, she was the last to board. Her first class ticket gripped in one hand, she finally made her way to her seat. As she sat down, Hilde noticed that the entire first class cabin was empty, except for her.
'Quatre, still looking out for your friends.' Hilde thought to herself as she shook her head.
The attendant came by and took her garment bag for her tight grasp. Not knowing what to do with her hands, Hilde sunk down in the plush seat and fastened her seat belt. Her hands found their way to the ends of the armrests; her nails biting into the cushioned padding. Pushing her head back against the high backed seat, Hilde closed her eyes and tried to remain calm.
She was terrified to fly. Piloting a mobile suit is a completely different situation then flying on a commercial flight. The main reason was control. If she could actually fly the shuttle, things would be better.
As the engines roared to life, Hilde's grip became harder; causing her knuckles to turn white. 'At least Quatre was kind enough to make sure I didn't embarrass myself in front of anyone. Who would have thought that me, an ex-OZ soldier, would be afraid to fly?' Hilde forced herself to look out the window and watch as the shuttle was wheeled out onto the launch ramp.
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain calling from the flight deck. We've been cleared for launch. We ask everyone to please double check his or her safety belts. As soon as the flight attendants give us the thumbs up, we'll be on our way. Today's flight to L4 should last approximately 3 hours."
Sunlight streamed through the small window, landing on the right side of her face; glistening off the single tear that raced down her face. The sudden acceleration pushed Hilde further back into her seat as the shuttle gained speed for take-off, forcing her to close her eyes.
Though she remained silent, her mind and heart both screamed, "This is a mistake!" But she was unable to turn back now, just like she was unable to go back and change the events of three years ago . . .
It was a simple kiss, an innocent kiss. Or at least it had started out that way. A kiss that they had done time and time again. But the way his eyes burned deep into hers, Hilde knew it was more than just one innocent kiss. Duo tilted his head slightly to the side and applied a little more pressure against her lips. She sighed, giving him the chance to deepen the kiss, taking them further into the sea of passion they had been swept into.
Clothes and inhibitions were shed, as they explored each other by both touch and taste. Duo's hands worked magic as they traveled across her body, taking her to heights she'd never experienced before. Even with her lack of knowledge, lead by desire, instinct and love, Hilde had been able to return the favor, her voice escaping his lips in a harsh whisper.
They finally came together, wrapped in each other's embrace. No amount of physical pain could override the pleasure coursing through her body. Slowly, Duo took her to the highest peak, promising her the stars if she wanted them. Hilde wound her hands into her long hair and brought his face down to hers; his lips on hers as she finally reached the stars he had promised her with each touch, each kiss.
Duo rolled to his side, pulling Hilde with him, so they lay face to face. Her eyes were closed as she sighed and curled against the warmth of his body like a contented kitten. Duo placed a chaste kiss on her forehead and the let sleep consume him as well.
Sunlight poured in the bedroom the next morning, dancing across her face, pulling her from the darkness of sleep. Hilde rubbed the sleep from her eyes and as her vision cleared she was able to take in her surroundings. She was in Duo's room, in Duo's bed. With that warm thought tucked tightly into place, Hilde let herself think about the possibility that dreams do come true.
Holding the sheet tight against her chest, she rolled over to greet the other occupant in the bed, her lover. But what she saw caused her smile to falter and then quickly disappear.
He sat on the edge of the bed, clad in only a pair of black silk boxer shorts. His glorious hair was loose, cascading down his back. Tears quickly pricked at her eyes when she noticed that Duo held is face in his hands.
"Duo?" Hilde called his name as she reached out to touch him, but she hesitated, letting her hand hang in the air only a few inches away from his shoulder.
Duo's head shot up at the soft sound of her voice. He didn't look at her; he just continued to stare into the room in front of him. "I'm sorry, Hilde." He said, his voice barley above a whisper.
The tears she had been holding back threatened to fall as she realized where this conversation was headed. He turned his body slightly to the side, bringing his face completely around to look into hers. He ran his hand through his bangs to around the back of his neck.
"I . . . Things got a little out of hand last night. I guess you could say that I was caught up in the moment. But the truth is . . ." Duo paused, searching for the right words. "I'm sorry, Hilde. What happened last night . . . it was a mistake."
A slap in the face wouldn't have stung as deeply as the words that just tumbled from his mouth. Hilde was thankful that the sun was behind her, casting her face in shadows. She could see the regret in his beautiful cobalt eyes. What could she say? 'Last night was the most wonderful night of my life!' Or better yet, 'I love you!'
Instead, she just remained silent. Duo moved closer to her, trying to read her expression but her face was hidden by morning shadows and a wall of messy bangs.
"Hilde, I realize we can't go back and change what happened, but I still want to be your best friend. And I still want you to be my best friend. Last night, doesn't have to change that."
She watched from beneath her bangs as Duo extended his hand towards her. A tentative smile appeared as he simply asked, "Friends?"
She looked up into his handsome face. She'd never been able to deny him anything, so she'd deny her own feeling just to see him honestly smile. Grasping his hand in hers, she shook it and answered him back, "Friends." . . .
Hilde opened her eyes and found the moon harshly glaring at her. She detached her fingers from the armrest and rubbed her hands over her chilled arms. The stewardess picked that moment to stop by. "Can I get you something to drink, Ms. Schbeiker?"
"Hot tea, please." She answered quickly before turning her attention back out of the shuttle window.
And so friends they had remained, or had tried to remain friends. But their relationship changed forever in just that one night; a night that neither of them mentioned again.
Gone were the carefree attitudes, the fun nights, the casual flirting. For the first couple of weeks after that night, they walked on eggshells around each other. The guys at the scarp yard joked about the tension being so thick you couldn't cut it with a scythe.
Hilde watched as Duo moved on with his life, dating other women. In time, it seemed he had totally forgotten about the night they spent together. He started treating her like he had before, his best friend. But Hilde had been unable to move on, unable to forget. She loved him so much that she cherished the one night they spent together, even if he regretted the entire episode.
Finally, Hilde could no longer stand living with him, constantly remained of what she had dared to dream for and couldn't have. On a whim, she had sent applications to a couple of universities on Earth, and was accepted on scholarship to the Freie Universitat Berlin. She jumped at the chance to get far away from Duo, so she left him and Howard in charge of the scrap yard, while she pursued her degree in Interspatial Affairs.
The distance had allowed her to learn more about her life and herself. As the semesters turned into years, the correspondence between herself and Duo grew from days to weeks to months. It had been better this way, hadn't it?
Hilde took a sip of her hot tea. She still loved him. Time and distance hadn't been able to dull any of her feelings for him.
"Ms. Schbeiker?"
Hilde shook her head and glanced up at the attendant. "I'm sorry."
The stewardess smiled. "That's okay, dear. We're about ready to land at the colony."
"Okay. Thank you." Hilde replied as she handed the young woman her unfinished cup of tea. Hilde rechecked her seat belt, making sure it was secure before she closed her eyes and pushed her head back into the plush chair back.
As her fingers pressed into the armrest as the shuttle approached the colony, Hilde couldn't help but wonder, how long she could stand there and pretend to be nothing more than Duo's friend before she snapped?
****************
The limo ride to the Winner Estate took her right through the heart of the colony. Living on Earth for the past three years had somewhat spoiled her to the beauty of Nature. Things such as sunlight and moonlight didn't need to be replicated. On the Earth, beneath the grass was dirt, not tons of metal. She was even amazed at the structural differences between L4 and L2. The colony contained numerous buildings and monuments built in Arabic fashion. Hilde continued to stare out of the tinted windows, watching the city disappear behind her.
The small the city became, the closer they came to the Winner Estate. Her palms grew damp as the huge mansion came into view. The Georgian style mansion seemed out of place compared to the Arabic architecture of the rest of the colony, but it seemed to suit the Winners.
As the limo pulled to a stop at the bottom to the stairs, Hilde saw Quatre and Trowa waiting for her near the doorway. "Too late to turn back now." She muttered to herself as the chauffeur opened the door. Hilde curled herself from the vehicle and gave them both a smile.
Quatre watched her as she followed the chauffeur up the stairs to where they were waiting. Trowa noticed the frown that formed on his lover's brow. "What's wrong?"
"She's apprehensive. Very apprehensive." Quatre said, his gaze never wavering off of Hilde's form.
Trowa smirked. "You don't have to be an empath to figure that out." His green eyes darted between Quatre's face and the wide cornflower blue eyes of the girl ascending the stairs.
Hilde stopped five steps shy from the front porch. Quatre smiled at her and descended the last few stairs to greet her. "Hilde, we're so happy that you were able to attend the party." He said as he extended a hand toward her. Hilde quickly rubbed her clammy against her pants before she let him take hold and lead her into the house.
Trowa followed behind them as the moved into the main hallway. Hilde stopped and stared; actually gawked would be a better word. Beautiful paintings and tapestries were scattered along the walls, while various sculptures and statues lined the walkway. She was reminded of all the castles located along the Rhine River she had dragged Anka to one summer.
Quatre flashed Trowa a sad smile as he watched her lightly run her hands along a tapestry depicting the mythological birth of the goddess Aphrodite. "Quatre, these tapestries are exquisite. How long have they been in your family?"
Trowa placed his hand on Quatre's shoulder, giving him a quick squeeze, a silent message that he was going to leave the two of them alone. Quatre placed his hand on his lover's, letting him know that he would come to him after he was done. With the silent words spoken, Trowa bowed slightly to Hilde and then excused himself, looking back over his shoulder as he continued to walk down the hallway.
"You don't have to make idle conversation for my sake, Hilde."
"Using your empathic abilities again?" Hilde asked, her back still turned to her friend.
"Not this time." Quatre watched as Hilde turned around and faced him. She wouldn't look him straight in the eye, so Quatre decided to try the direct approach. "How are you, Hilde?"
"Things are good. I have finals in two weeks, followed by graduation. You're still coming to the graduation ceremony, aren't you?"
"Yes. Both Trowa and I will be there to see you walk across that stage." Quatre paused and looked at his friend before he continued, "But I didn't mean how was school, I meant how are you doing?"
Hilde lowered her head and said, "I'd rather not talk about it."
Quatre softly grabbed her chin with his hand and turned her face up toward his. "Hilde, it's not good to keep all of these emotions you have bottled up inside. It's hurts watching you do this to yourself. Maybe it's time you really told Duo how you feel about him."
Hilde jerked her chin out of his hand. "No, Quatre. He's rejected me once; I couldn't bear it if he did it again. So, I will pretend for one more day, that we're friends. After tomorrow night, he won't see me again since I took the job on Venus. The transport for Venus leaves the day after graduation."
He knew it was no use to argue with her when she dug in her heels about something. Sighing, he bent over and kicked up her garment bag. "Come on, I'll show you to your room." Quatre lead her down the hallway and into the east wing of the mansion. He stopped about a quarter of the way into the wing and turned to the door on his left. "I hope you like your room." He said as he threw the door open.
Hilde thought she had just stepped into a fairy tale. The walls were painted a pale yellow that complimented the rosewood furniture scattered through out the room. In the far corner near the sliding glass doors that lead to the balcony, was a water fountain. It's calming sounds filled the entire room. But the biggest surprise was the traditional Arabian style bed that stood in the middle of the entire room. The bed consisted of nothing but huge pillows and a sheer canopy.
"Quatre, this is absolutely breath-taking!" Hilde exclaimed as she spun around, trying to catch every detail.
"I'm glad you like it, Hilde." Quatre reached for the doorknob to the bedroom door. "Everyone else will be arriving tomorrow, so you pretty much have the run of the entire house. But I suggest you get some rest first. Dinner is an informal affair around this place. Just ring the kitchen when you're hungry."
Hilde stopped him before he completely closed the door. "Quatre, thank you, for everything. Especially, the flight."
He sent her a kind smile. "You're welcome, Hilde. Don't worry. Your secrets are save with me." With that said, Quatre quietly pulled the door closed behind him. Once the door was closed, he leaned his forehead against it for support.
"I take it things didn't go well." Quatre was not surprised when he heard the quiet voice come from the shadows of the hallway. He turned and found emerald green eyes staring at him.
"Nope, she's just as stubborn as she was three years ago." A heavy sigh escaped his lips. "I just want them both to find happiness, like you and me, Heero and Relena, Wufei and Sally."
"Don't worry, little one. They'll find their way to each other... eventually." Putting his arm around Quatre, Trowa lead him away from the bedroom door and down the hall.
On the other side of the door, Hilde pushed back the sheer canopy of her bed and fell onto the bed of soft pillows. Kicking off her shoes, she curled up on her side and pulled the fleece blanket up over the lower part of her body.
"I'll take just a quick nap and then call the kitchen and order the biggest chocolate fudge sundae in the world." She muttered to no one in particular. Her full lashes lay against her cheeks as she closed her eyes and sunk further into the pillows.
She never did get that sundae. For the first time in three years, the ghosts from her past memories did not haunt her dreams.
A/N: Merry Christmas Everyone! I hope you all have a wonderful holiday season. Kristen, thanks for putting up with the numerous revisions of this story, you're the best! Credit for the title all goes to Lara_Winner, thanks for helping me get past the mental block on the name for this fic.
Dedication: To anyone who has ever lost or walked away from true love, here's hoping that one day it will find its way back to you.
****************
You are cordially invited
To the 21st Birthday Party
For Mr. Quatre Raberba Winner
On the 13th day of May AC 201
The party will be held at
The Winner Residence on L4
Please RSVP by 02 April AC 201
****************
"How many times do I have to tell you, Anka? I. AM. NOT. GOING!" Hilde threw her hands down in frustration as she argued with her sorority sister.
Anka looked up from her magazine, an amused look played across her face. "Hilde, you've been keeping secrets from us for the past three years."
The petite redhead lounging on the bed, chimed in. "You never told us that you knew Quatre Winner. The heir to the biggest fortune in the entire universe."
"It must have slipped my mind, Gwen." Hilde said as she plopped down the chair sitting in front of her desk. 'Who could have thought that one little invitation would cause this much chaos?' Placing her elbows on her knees, she rested her chin in her cupped hands.
For the past three years, she had been living in the Omega Beta Zeta house on the campus of the Freie Universitat Berlin. Here she had found the sisters that she had always dreamed about. The ones you could gossip with, the ones who always had a shoulder to cry on, the ones that would sit with you, eat ice cream and watch sappy love stories.
But in a matter of two weeks, she would be thrown out in the real world again, and she wasn't looking forward to it one bit.
Dragged from her thoughts, she found a pair of emerald greens eyes and one of cooper brown staring directly at her. Hilde sighed and smiled slightly. "Even if I wanted to go, I have finals in two weeks and graduation shortly after. I have no time to attend fancy parties, when I my life hangs in the balance of those tests."
Gwen pushed herself up into a seated position. "Stop being so melodramatic, Hilde. You've got a 4.0 G.P.A; all your professors love you. Hell, you're even graduating a year earlier than the rest of us. You need to enjoy life, not spend it buried in textbooks."
'You guys don't know how much of life I've experienced in my 20 years.' The thought came to Hilde's mind but never escaped her lips. Some secrets were best kept swept under rugs.
Tossing her blond hair, Anka added, "Besides we already sent your RSVP."
Hilde stared at her friend, her mouth slightly open. Anka laughed at the comical look on her best friends face. "Hilde, you better close your mouth or you're liable to catch flies."
Regaining her composure, she sent Anka a narrowed look. "How could you do that to me?" Quickly stalking across the room, Hilde moved over to the vid-phone. "I'll just have to call Quatre and explain to him that I'm not able to make it because . . . because I don't have the money. Yea, that's it!"
Before she could begin to place the call, Gwen cleared her throat. "I'm afraid that won't work." Reaching into the top drawer of her night side, Gwen withdrew an envelope and walked over to Hilde. "You see, Quatre already made arrangements for your travel." Placing the envelope in Hilde's open palm, Gwen retreated back to her side of the room, not wanting to take the full force of her friends temper.
Hilde pulled out the tickets and itinerary and looked at them through misty eyes. Her heart and her brain had been at constant odds since the invitation arrived in the mail. It seemed that her friends had been the deciding factor. 'Always count on your friends to either get you out of messes, or put you right in the middle of them.'
Blinking a couple of times, her vision cleared and Hilde took her first long look at the agenda. The color drained from her face as she quickly brought her head up. "I leave tomorrow?!" Hilde began to panic. "I have nothing to wear to a formal function like this! Where am I going to find a dress at the last minute?"
Gwen and Anka looked at each other with huge bright smiles. "SHOPPING TRIP!!" Pulling Hilde out of the chair, Anka headed for the door, while Gwen grabbed their purses and the car keys.
****************
A couple hundred dollars poorer and one dress richer, Hilde stood on the jet-way casting her friends an apprehensive look and a tentative wave. As she watched the jet-way pull away from the docking area, he subconsciously tightened her grip on her garment bag. She felt like a little girl, going on her first trip away from home; scared and uncertain.
Sighing, Hilde turned away from the closed doors that lead to the space dock and sluggishly moved toward the shuttle. Due to her despondency, she was the last to board. Her first class ticket gripped in one hand, she finally made her way to her seat. As she sat down, Hilde noticed that the entire first class cabin was empty, except for her.
'Quatre, still looking out for your friends.' Hilde thought to herself as she shook her head.
The attendant came by and took her garment bag for her tight grasp. Not knowing what to do with her hands, Hilde sunk down in the plush seat and fastened her seat belt. Her hands found their way to the ends of the armrests; her nails biting into the cushioned padding. Pushing her head back against the high backed seat, Hilde closed her eyes and tried to remain calm.
She was terrified to fly. Piloting a mobile suit is a completely different situation then flying on a commercial flight. The main reason was control. If she could actually fly the shuttle, things would be better.
As the engines roared to life, Hilde's grip became harder; causing her knuckles to turn white. 'At least Quatre was kind enough to make sure I didn't embarrass myself in front of anyone. Who would have thought that me, an ex-OZ soldier, would be afraid to fly?' Hilde forced herself to look out the window and watch as the shuttle was wheeled out onto the launch ramp.
"Ladies and gentlemen, this is your captain calling from the flight deck. We've been cleared for launch. We ask everyone to please double check his or her safety belts. As soon as the flight attendants give us the thumbs up, we'll be on our way. Today's flight to L4 should last approximately 3 hours."
Sunlight streamed through the small window, landing on the right side of her face; glistening off the single tear that raced down her face. The sudden acceleration pushed Hilde further back into her seat as the shuttle gained speed for take-off, forcing her to close her eyes.
Though she remained silent, her mind and heart both screamed, "This is a mistake!" But she was unable to turn back now, just like she was unable to go back and change the events of three years ago . . .
It was a simple kiss, an innocent kiss. Or at least it had started out that way. A kiss that they had done time and time again. But the way his eyes burned deep into hers, Hilde knew it was more than just one innocent kiss. Duo tilted his head slightly to the side and applied a little more pressure against her lips. She sighed, giving him the chance to deepen the kiss, taking them further into the sea of passion they had been swept into.
Clothes and inhibitions were shed, as they explored each other by both touch and taste. Duo's hands worked magic as they traveled across her body, taking her to heights she'd never experienced before. Even with her lack of knowledge, lead by desire, instinct and love, Hilde had been able to return the favor, her voice escaping his lips in a harsh whisper.
They finally came together, wrapped in each other's embrace. No amount of physical pain could override the pleasure coursing through her body. Slowly, Duo took her to the highest peak, promising her the stars if she wanted them. Hilde wound her hands into her long hair and brought his face down to hers; his lips on hers as she finally reached the stars he had promised her with each touch, each kiss.
Duo rolled to his side, pulling Hilde with him, so they lay face to face. Her eyes were closed as she sighed and curled against the warmth of his body like a contented kitten. Duo placed a chaste kiss on her forehead and the let sleep consume him as well.
Sunlight poured in the bedroom the next morning, dancing across her face, pulling her from the darkness of sleep. Hilde rubbed the sleep from her eyes and as her vision cleared she was able to take in her surroundings. She was in Duo's room, in Duo's bed. With that warm thought tucked tightly into place, Hilde let herself think about the possibility that dreams do come true.
Holding the sheet tight against her chest, she rolled over to greet the other occupant in the bed, her lover. But what she saw caused her smile to falter and then quickly disappear.
He sat on the edge of the bed, clad in only a pair of black silk boxer shorts. His glorious hair was loose, cascading down his back. Tears quickly pricked at her eyes when she noticed that Duo held is face in his hands.
"Duo?" Hilde called his name as she reached out to touch him, but she hesitated, letting her hand hang in the air only a few inches away from his shoulder.
Duo's head shot up at the soft sound of her voice. He didn't look at her; he just continued to stare into the room in front of him. "I'm sorry, Hilde." He said, his voice barley above a whisper.
The tears she had been holding back threatened to fall as she realized where this conversation was headed. He turned his body slightly to the side, bringing his face completely around to look into hers. He ran his hand through his bangs to around the back of his neck.
"I . . . Things got a little out of hand last night. I guess you could say that I was caught up in the moment. But the truth is . . ." Duo paused, searching for the right words. "I'm sorry, Hilde. What happened last night . . . it was a mistake."
A slap in the face wouldn't have stung as deeply as the words that just tumbled from his mouth. Hilde was thankful that the sun was behind her, casting her face in shadows. She could see the regret in his beautiful cobalt eyes. What could she say? 'Last night was the most wonderful night of my life!' Or better yet, 'I love you!'
Instead, she just remained silent. Duo moved closer to her, trying to read her expression but her face was hidden by morning shadows and a wall of messy bangs.
"Hilde, I realize we can't go back and change what happened, but I still want to be your best friend. And I still want you to be my best friend. Last night, doesn't have to change that."
She watched from beneath her bangs as Duo extended his hand towards her. A tentative smile appeared as he simply asked, "Friends?"
She looked up into his handsome face. She'd never been able to deny him anything, so she'd deny her own feeling just to see him honestly smile. Grasping his hand in hers, she shook it and answered him back, "Friends." . . .
Hilde opened her eyes and found the moon harshly glaring at her. She detached her fingers from the armrest and rubbed her hands over her chilled arms. The stewardess picked that moment to stop by. "Can I get you something to drink, Ms. Schbeiker?"
"Hot tea, please." She answered quickly before turning her attention back out of the shuttle window.
And so friends they had remained, or had tried to remain friends. But their relationship changed forever in just that one night; a night that neither of them mentioned again.
Gone were the carefree attitudes, the fun nights, the casual flirting. For the first couple of weeks after that night, they walked on eggshells around each other. The guys at the scarp yard joked about the tension being so thick you couldn't cut it with a scythe.
Hilde watched as Duo moved on with his life, dating other women. In time, it seemed he had totally forgotten about the night they spent together. He started treating her like he had before, his best friend. But Hilde had been unable to move on, unable to forget. She loved him so much that she cherished the one night they spent together, even if he regretted the entire episode.
Finally, Hilde could no longer stand living with him, constantly remained of what she had dared to dream for and couldn't have. On a whim, she had sent applications to a couple of universities on Earth, and was accepted on scholarship to the Freie Universitat Berlin. She jumped at the chance to get far away from Duo, so she left him and Howard in charge of the scrap yard, while she pursued her degree in Interspatial Affairs.
The distance had allowed her to learn more about her life and herself. As the semesters turned into years, the correspondence between herself and Duo grew from days to weeks to months. It had been better this way, hadn't it?
Hilde took a sip of her hot tea. She still loved him. Time and distance hadn't been able to dull any of her feelings for him.
"Ms. Schbeiker?"
Hilde shook her head and glanced up at the attendant. "I'm sorry."
The stewardess smiled. "That's okay, dear. We're about ready to land at the colony."
"Okay. Thank you." Hilde replied as she handed the young woman her unfinished cup of tea. Hilde rechecked her seat belt, making sure it was secure before she closed her eyes and pushed her head back into the plush chair back.
As her fingers pressed into the armrest as the shuttle approached the colony, Hilde couldn't help but wonder, how long she could stand there and pretend to be nothing more than Duo's friend before she snapped?
****************
The limo ride to the Winner Estate took her right through the heart of the colony. Living on Earth for the past three years had somewhat spoiled her to the beauty of Nature. Things such as sunlight and moonlight didn't need to be replicated. On the Earth, beneath the grass was dirt, not tons of metal. She was even amazed at the structural differences between L4 and L2. The colony contained numerous buildings and monuments built in Arabic fashion. Hilde continued to stare out of the tinted windows, watching the city disappear behind her.
The small the city became, the closer they came to the Winner Estate. Her palms grew damp as the huge mansion came into view. The Georgian style mansion seemed out of place compared to the Arabic architecture of the rest of the colony, but it seemed to suit the Winners.
As the limo pulled to a stop at the bottom to the stairs, Hilde saw Quatre and Trowa waiting for her near the doorway. "Too late to turn back now." She muttered to herself as the chauffeur opened the door. Hilde curled herself from the vehicle and gave them both a smile.
Quatre watched her as she followed the chauffeur up the stairs to where they were waiting. Trowa noticed the frown that formed on his lover's brow. "What's wrong?"
"She's apprehensive. Very apprehensive." Quatre said, his gaze never wavering off of Hilde's form.
Trowa smirked. "You don't have to be an empath to figure that out." His green eyes darted between Quatre's face and the wide cornflower blue eyes of the girl ascending the stairs.
Hilde stopped five steps shy from the front porch. Quatre smiled at her and descended the last few stairs to greet her. "Hilde, we're so happy that you were able to attend the party." He said as he extended a hand toward her. Hilde quickly rubbed her clammy against her pants before she let him take hold and lead her into the house.
Trowa followed behind them as the moved into the main hallway. Hilde stopped and stared; actually gawked would be a better word. Beautiful paintings and tapestries were scattered along the walls, while various sculptures and statues lined the walkway. She was reminded of all the castles located along the Rhine River she had dragged Anka to one summer.
Quatre flashed Trowa a sad smile as he watched her lightly run her hands along a tapestry depicting the mythological birth of the goddess Aphrodite. "Quatre, these tapestries are exquisite. How long have they been in your family?"
Trowa placed his hand on Quatre's shoulder, giving him a quick squeeze, a silent message that he was going to leave the two of them alone. Quatre placed his hand on his lover's, letting him know that he would come to him after he was done. With the silent words spoken, Trowa bowed slightly to Hilde and then excused himself, looking back over his shoulder as he continued to walk down the hallway.
"You don't have to make idle conversation for my sake, Hilde."
"Using your empathic abilities again?" Hilde asked, her back still turned to her friend.
"Not this time." Quatre watched as Hilde turned around and faced him. She wouldn't look him straight in the eye, so Quatre decided to try the direct approach. "How are you, Hilde?"
"Things are good. I have finals in two weeks, followed by graduation. You're still coming to the graduation ceremony, aren't you?"
"Yes. Both Trowa and I will be there to see you walk across that stage." Quatre paused and looked at his friend before he continued, "But I didn't mean how was school, I meant how are you doing?"
Hilde lowered her head and said, "I'd rather not talk about it."
Quatre softly grabbed her chin with his hand and turned her face up toward his. "Hilde, it's not good to keep all of these emotions you have bottled up inside. It's hurts watching you do this to yourself. Maybe it's time you really told Duo how you feel about him."
Hilde jerked her chin out of his hand. "No, Quatre. He's rejected me once; I couldn't bear it if he did it again. So, I will pretend for one more day, that we're friends. After tomorrow night, he won't see me again since I took the job on Venus. The transport for Venus leaves the day after graduation."
He knew it was no use to argue with her when she dug in her heels about something. Sighing, he bent over and kicked up her garment bag. "Come on, I'll show you to your room." Quatre lead her down the hallway and into the east wing of the mansion. He stopped about a quarter of the way into the wing and turned to the door on his left. "I hope you like your room." He said as he threw the door open.
Hilde thought she had just stepped into a fairy tale. The walls were painted a pale yellow that complimented the rosewood furniture scattered through out the room. In the far corner near the sliding glass doors that lead to the balcony, was a water fountain. It's calming sounds filled the entire room. But the biggest surprise was the traditional Arabian style bed that stood in the middle of the entire room. The bed consisted of nothing but huge pillows and a sheer canopy.
"Quatre, this is absolutely breath-taking!" Hilde exclaimed as she spun around, trying to catch every detail.
"I'm glad you like it, Hilde." Quatre reached for the doorknob to the bedroom door. "Everyone else will be arriving tomorrow, so you pretty much have the run of the entire house. But I suggest you get some rest first. Dinner is an informal affair around this place. Just ring the kitchen when you're hungry."
Hilde stopped him before he completely closed the door. "Quatre, thank you, for everything. Especially, the flight."
He sent her a kind smile. "You're welcome, Hilde. Don't worry. Your secrets are save with me." With that said, Quatre quietly pulled the door closed behind him. Once the door was closed, he leaned his forehead against it for support.
"I take it things didn't go well." Quatre was not surprised when he heard the quiet voice come from the shadows of the hallway. He turned and found emerald green eyes staring at him.
"Nope, she's just as stubborn as she was three years ago." A heavy sigh escaped his lips. "I just want them both to find happiness, like you and me, Heero and Relena, Wufei and Sally."
"Don't worry, little one. They'll find their way to each other... eventually." Putting his arm around Quatre, Trowa lead him away from the bedroom door and down the hall.
On the other side of the door, Hilde pushed back the sheer canopy of her bed and fell onto the bed of soft pillows. Kicking off her shoes, she curled up on her side and pulled the fleece blanket up over the lower part of her body.
"I'll take just a quick nap and then call the kitchen and order the biggest chocolate fudge sundae in the world." She muttered to no one in particular. Her full lashes lay against her cheeks as she closed her eyes and sunk further into the pillows.
She never did get that sundae. For the first time in three years, the ghosts from her past memories did not haunt her dreams.