A Friendly Game of Dodge Ball
Summary: "If you can dodge a wrench, you can dodge a ball!" OneShot for the lulz Rated T for a few bad words.
I'm back readers! Sorry about not updating some of my other stories...I'm working on it : } Anyways, just writing a little sport-y themed story for the lulz Inspired by MissNelle's story "Baseball Battle! Earth vs Asgard!" you should read it, it's really funny. Enjoy.
Chapter 1
The lodge room doors slide open and Thor and Loki passed happily threw the threshold "Friends! I have just finished watching a most marvelous movie film." Loki scoffed "Thor it was barbaric, tools should not be thrown in a friendly jest." Everyone was curious as to what the two gods were talking about. Tony even paused his game, at the mention of "tools" being thrown. "Come on Loki, it was a great team building activity." Loki rolled his eyes "It was an okay team building activity at best, why not engage in a friendly battle of Boggle or Guess Who?"
Thor gave Loki a friendly slap on the back "Loki, please while a game of the mind might prove useful for you, a game in which you ready yourself for anything will prove to be far better skill on the battle field." Loki huffed; he rather liked the idea of Boggle, after seeing it played by the Great Peggy Hill from the Hill that bores Kings television show "Fine."
"Great! Friends let us play a friendly game of dodge ball!" The room fell silent for a few moments until the sound of Tony snickering filled room "Bwahahahahaha, you can't be serious, bwhahahahaha, you're serious? You're serious!" Tony fell backwards his game controller still in hand. Clint laughed a bit at Tony's antics and Steve frowned at the playboy's rude actions.
Natasha looked at Thor "Thor..." but she could tell by the look in his eyes that he was serious. The thunder god really thought this was a good idea, and his beaming smile started to slowly fade. Bruce put down his newspaper "Guys," but Tony only laughed harder. Natasha rolled her eyes "I'm in." The room fell silent again. Clint's jaw dropped and all eyes were on her, she even had Loki's full attention. Tony leaned back on one elbow "You can't be serious?" he asked more serious this time.
"What? You boys afraid of a little game of dodge ball." everyone looked at Tony "Well no, but we don't even have enough players." That's when Phil walked in, "High guys, what's this about dodge ball?" Now Tony's jaw dropped "Yeah, four on four, not happening you need at least five-" Then entered Jane and Darcy. "Sup guys!" Darcy waved. Tony gave up "W-what! What are they even-" Jane cut in "We're here to do research on the two way portal. We needed better equipment so Director Fury let us use the main lab here. Thor called use up for lunch and yeah, Hi."
Tony could feel his eye twitch. Thor could feel his smile coming back "So that settles it!" Tony sighed dramatically, tossing his PS3 controller on the floor "Well I'm picking my own team!" Thor crossed the room quickly pulling out a plastic bag and grabbing a piece of computer paper "No Tony, that would be unfair and thus defeat the purpose of this team building activity." Tony was about the say something but Steve beat him to the punch "What do you have in mind?"
Thor ripped up the little sheets of paper, writing little one's and two's on five pieces each "We do this on Asgard all the time, but with stones." he folded the little slips of paper and placed them all into the plastic bag "Each of you will draw from this plastic pack and be sorted into your respective teams."
Jane nodded "Sounds good to me." everyone slowly agreed and Thor placed the plastic bag on the coffee table for all to reach "Gather round! Tony since you have requested so, you may go first. Let it be known that whoever picks the one or the two first will be the team captain!" Clint scoffed shaking his head side to side and everyone else just prayed to be on the same team as Thor.
Tony drew first "Two? Eh, I'm still number one."
Steve was next; he reached slowly in the bag, pulling out the little white piece of paper. Tony peeked over "Tony!" but the brunette just rolled his eyes "Hurry up Cap sickle." Steve finally got the paper opened "Two!" Tony clinched his fist "Yes! High five!"
Phil was next, "Please be two, Please be two, Please be two." he closed his eyes and unfolded the paper "TWO! Yesh!" Steve smiled, Tony shrugged.
Loki was next "Well if I must." he pulled out the next piece of paper "One," Thor beamed, "That means you are team captain of One!" Loki sighed "Yay" in the most lack luster way possible.
Thor was up next, this was the drawing everyone was waiting for. Everyone watched the god dip his muscular fingers into the thin plastic bag. Loki and Tony both prayed for the god of thunder to be on their team. "Two?" Tony went mad giving high fives to Steve and Phil, Thor frowned looking at his brother "Aww, but I wanted-" Tony pulled the big blonde over to him "Too late, you're on my team! And that just leaves on spot left on team Tony is Awesome!" Tony eyed Bruce, while the rest of the team looked around the room with indifference.
Clint was next "Aright, give me a two," he reached into the bag "Wha-one. awww" Clint slumped and walked over to Loki, who patted him on the back. "Looks like the odds are not in your favor," the god of mischief bowed slightly "Welcome back number 1." the look on Clint's face was priceless.
Natasha was up next, she grabbed her piece of paper quickly "Two," she turned it around for the group to see. Tony and Clint frowned; Thor looked like his heart was being ripped out, and Loki facepalmed.
Phil clapped his hands together "Alright, Looks like Bruce, Jane, and Darcy are all on team one. Good luck guys, let's meet down in the practice room around 5-ish?" The groups disbanded to their respective practicing areas, which were few. Loki's team headed to the parking deck, while Tony's team crammed into one of the unused rooms in the back of his lab. None of the teams were allowed to use the practice room, on Fury's orders, he liked the idea of a "friendly" dodge ball game. Mostly because of the idea of anyone throwing anything at Tony amused him, he ordered for the room to be reinforced so that some of the other agents and guest could fit in.
~Team One's Strong Hold~
"Okay," Loki clasped his hands together, looking at his bewildered team "Strategies. Hmmmmm, Ah yes, avoid being stricken down but Thor at all cost. Stark can be a little cocky and tends to preform terrible when over confident. Please keep your eyes on Miss Romanoff." Loki pointed at Clint "You, keep your eyes off of Miss Romanoff, I would not put it pass her to use your child like affection for her against you." Clint rolled his eyes "Miss Foster and Miss Lewis please keep on your toes." The two women nodded "You," Loki pointed again "Dr. Banner for the love of Odin, please do not Hulk out." The doctor nodded nervously
~Team Two's a.k.a Team Tony is Awesome Strong Hold~
"Alright team, we got a pretty good thing going for use, with Captain patriotic and Goldilocks on our team." Looking around at his team "And I guess it's a good thing we have Fan boy and Wonder woman too." They rolled their eyes at their pet names, not feeling as over confident of the billionaire. "Let's get out there and kick some Team One's ass!"
5pm
"Time is exactly 5pm eastern time; teams please take your places at the back lines." JARVIS said "The rules are as followed, if you are hit by any of the red balls thrown by a member of the opposing team you are out. If you catch a ball thrown by a member of the opposing team then the player who threw the ball is out and the member holding the ball is safe and may be allowed to bring back any player on their team that was previously hit out. The first team to lose out five players will be deemed the loser. Ready..."
The players all lined up on their lines, team one wearing green jerseys and team two wearing red.
"Set..."
They all bent down clinching their fist, eyes fixed on the six rubber red balls all lined up at the middle of the court.
"Begin!"
~TBC