Title: Picnic by Bats
By: janahjean
Synopsis: offshoot from "dreaming of u's" and "chasing after robins"
One-shot. Justice league, robins and alfred on a picnic. No slash. Bmww.
Disclaimer: do not owe the characters. They are the properties of dc.
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The black limousine That stop by the edge of the road stole everyone's attention. It had been thirty minutes pass since superman had officially declare that they might as well start the picnic because it looks like batman is not coming at all.
"Thats probably batman. Lets all calm down instead of crowding him which he might hate" the martian telepathy-ly told the six. So they pretended to continue with their task while keeping an eye on the limousine.
"Ill go get them." Diana offer.
Alfred slide out of the driver's seat and the soundproofing of the limo's interior broke
"-you cant make me!"
"Boys! You better behave or el-"
"Dad! Damian bit me!"
"Whose stupid idea was this picnic any-"
" ****** you!"
"Watch your -"
It was accompanied by grappling, tussling and kicking and look alarm at alfred who just sigh.
"Excuse me madam as i set this on the table." Alfred said calmly as he fish out a basket and walk away.
"Uh,bruce?" Diana ask tentatively.
The atmosphere was filled suddenly with embarass silence.
"Just...wait a second okey?" Bruce said softly.
"Comb your hairs and act like human beings okey?" He hiss at his kids before he tried to look presentable.
"Diana!" Bruce wayne, playboy, billionaire and philantropist step out of the car all charm and suave polishness. Watching him grin and you will think that he wasnt upset earlier.
Diana give him a look that somehow penetrate thru Bruce's sunglasses. Bruce sweated a little knowing that diana was calling out bull at his fake brucie persona. Bruce stubbornly hold on to the mask.
"Boys met your aunt." He told the car occupants.
The three boys came out and stand beside bruce wayne. You could practically see them smoldering as the sun burns them since they are the agents of darkness.
Bruce Wayne with his casual wear of a polo and black slacks wave at his eldest. " this is dick." He introduce the hood tshirt wearing, baggy pants boy who was wearing a shade like his father. Dick have messy hair unlike his dad.
"Hi aunt." Dick hug diana.
"Tim..." Bruce continued the introduction as he pat the hair of the child next to dick. Bruce made a face when he encounter the huge amount of gel tim put on his hair. Diana was amuse that the second kid was almost like bruce with the brush up hair and the boy was wearing a suit. He got brown hair and brown eyes. "Nice to meet you maam" he politely extend a hand. His brown eyes look smart and shy at the same time.
"Likewise." Diana murmured.
"...Damian" theres no doubt the youngest was half bruce alright. He was the exact copy of bruce except for the very semi-bald hair and the serious green eyes. Diana almost squeel when a flash of dimple came out and then, the kid runaway.
"Oh god! Lil d!" Tim chase after the kid in a flash.
Diana was still reeling with shock at the dimple which was totally not expected. Meanwhile Bruce was frowning. Someone is missing. "Jason, get your ass here. Now!" He shouted at the inside of the car.
Dick was already helping superman with the cooking meanwhile.
"No,Bruce!" The boy inside drawl, inwardly laughing.
Bruce snap. "You little-" and dive inside the car.
Diana face palm. She waited as the two fight each other and with no holds bar it seemed like.
"And this is Jason!" Bruce triumphantly emerge while yanking out his black sheep child by one earring. Bruce have a white band aid across the bridge of his nose and was grinning.
"Old man. It hurtsss." Jason whine pitifully.
Diana openly gape at Jason. The boy break the wayne's mould by a mile. He have a dark red hair and was wearing a basketball tshirt and shorts. However, he was sporting the eyes of bruce- a wolf blue eyes of a predator. He sport two band aids on his face- one across the nose and an older one on one cheek.
Diana made a mistake of extending her hand for a handshake. Jason grab it and not taking his eyes off diana, he kiss it. He murmur something french and let go of her hand.
Bruce was shaking with anger.
Jason eyes brighten when he caught his two favorite people outside his family at the distance. "Flashes! My boys. How are you!?" He yelled before he saunter away.
"Jasonnnn!" Wally yelled back as he run towards his friend delighted.
"Noooo!" Barry fled into the horizon wailing.
Jason jump into the younger speedster's back and scream "lets get barry!"
##
Damian and dick exchange gloating looks as the thoroughly embarass Bruce, tim and jason were slathered with sunscreen by Alfred.
"You smell absolutely divine Bruce." Dick cooed.
Diana shake her head fondly as bruce growl unhappily.
GL was explaining to the two other aliens why damian and dick didnt need that much sunscreen.
##
Diana hold Bruce's hands and tighten it with warning when bruce tried to Wiggle out from the display of affection. Superman and hawkgirl was laughing in the distance.
The couple decided to stop under an oak tree(coz thats the only tree i know) by mutual decision.
Bruce watch nervously in the corner of his eyes the thoughtful look that appears on his girlfriend's face.
"I dont see it enough you know" diana confess.
"Pardon?" Bruce slipped into a british accent (blame it on alfred) especially if someone caught him offguard.
Diana smile. "Your eyes Bruce." She flirted.
Bruce raised one incredulous eyebrow. He huff seeing diana's hopeful, persistent look. "Fineeeee" he said as he remove his shades.
"There you are." Diana said softly as she cup bruce's chin.
Bruce wolf eyes soften as he lean forward and kiss Diana.
##
Kid Flash and jason was giggling and giving each other high fives as they began to change clothes in the male toilet room. They have spend their money on clothes when they visit a nearby town using kf's super powers.
"Whoaa!" Jason who was rarely impress step back and admire the last piece that he applied that transfer KF as his complete doppelganger. He ignore KF gagging at the band aid which he put across KF's nose.
He was staring at KF's hair, which was a mess, at the dark sunglasses and finally the earring and band aid.
"I am really a gift to girls." Jason declare please. He wag a finger at Wally. " chin up my boy and when you walk do it with a strut."
"And smirk for the love of God." He added before he fish a comb from his wallet and tried to tidy his hair to look like Kid Flash.
Since KF was skinny, jason had expertly pick his disguise to give an illusion of thinness. Since Wally was poor, he made sure the clothes are moderate. He was more of an expert than wally and so was a lot quicker and he doesnt require assistance. He fish out foundation powder from his belt and quickly hid the bruise on his nose and cheek. He also grab a pair of rose tinted glasses that make his eyes look soft and innocent.
"Ja-"
Jason cut him off with one raised index finger. Jason carefully study his reflection with a scowl before he shake loose his shoulder and -
Kid flash almost shit his pants.
"Im hungry." Wally's voice sounded weird coming from jason's lips. Jason's usual smirk became the open, hopeful and cheerful smile. He also traded his posture to be loose and carefree and he was bouncing off his feet with energy.
Jason ever confident was the first to get out of the building singing Barry's name.
Later...
Wally was struggling to maintain his acting despite the fact the he seemed to be able to get away with grunts and curses. He glare at everyone who even look at his direction more out of nervousness that he might get his cover blow than acting it as Jason would was finally done in helping Bruce with _( insert whatever labor here) and it culminated to having bruce clasping a shoulder and a soft, "good job son."
Wally's first thought was whether or not this is a good touch or a bad touch from batman for crying out loud. His knees buckled a bit for being complimented and being called "son".
"Eh. Youre welcome" wally muttered as he address the ground.
Bruce eyes narrowed. He quickly remove Wally's shade. Wally look startled and fearful.
"That son of a bitch." Bruce growl as he watch Jason getting away in convincing the green lantern and hawkgirl from a distance as Wally.
Then wally jump in fright as Bruce laugh. "Wow " bruce said as he wipe his eyes. "A word of advise, Stay away from my kids if you dont want your cover blown."
Then bruce left.
##
Tim and john meanwhile was knee deep in the game of chess under the shade of another oak tree whom they shared with alfred. Alfred was reading a novel while sipping his cup of tea on a chair that dick thoughtfully provided.
For everytime they took each other piece out of the game, they reward themselves with a piece of oreo cookies.
Telepathecally though they were arguing about the schematics of the watch tower defense capabilities and how to upgrade the computer system.
The two were really quite good with their poker faces.
##
Kid Flash hurled curses at jason for not warning him about Damian being crazy. He just discover why you dont mess with the youngest. He was screaming his lungs out as he fled from Damian who was trying to slice him into pieces with a sword.
"Fuck!" Jason drop his props- snacks (which is a good reason why he wasnt using superspeed disguise as wally)and run towards his brother and only friend. He is getting sick of eating granola bars anyway.
Dick also race towards the commotion.
Somehow the three robins ended up in a brawl.
It was the best day of all who attended lives anyway
##
An: if i picture bruce wayne it was in"son of batman" the wayne manor is on "batman year one"
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