Note: The first one can be considered kind of crossover with Ghost Hunt, but you don't have to watch it to know. The second one is the sequel for the Drama CD (I can't remember which one, that one about Riko's chocolates), but, like the first one, it's stand alone. The fifth one is an idea I got from Haikyuu second episode, and I just really wanted to take it to the extreme! Everything basically revolve around Seirin and Kagakuro, but the last one was just a crack. Anyway, enjoy!
I. Building
Kagami was lost. He was not a man with poor direction, but he was just puzzled by the construction of path in this big mansion. He was instructed to set up the night-vision cameras and some microphones in the third floor rooms, and now he was walking here and there to go back to their base.
He was a man never afraid of ghosts; after all, it was their job to hunt one. But this one was actually creeped him out, having a maze mansion renovated over and over again just to trap a soul inside, or whatever the previous owner had told before he died.
He paced back and forth, there was a stairs in the west, one in the east, one above the walls, and he was definitely lost. He remembered putting some marks in the floor, but they just disappeared!
He felt goosebumps. The fuck! Where the hell do I go?!
"Kagami-kun." A voice said.
It took some milliseconds for the red head to register the voice in his head.
And he jumped. "Ahh! Kuroko! Damn it! We're on a haunted mansion and you have the nerve to act like a ghost!"
He grabbed the blue head's collar, and put his right fist near his face, acting as if wanting to fight.
"But you were taking forever. Captain's gonna scold you."
"Whatever. Let's go. I just checked if I installed them correctly." Kagami released Kuroko and scratched his head. He was actually grateful that the boy found him, or he might have been trapped in this fucking mansion.
"You really don't need to lie, Kagami-kun."
II. Space
"Gather!" Hyuuga called the team in the middle of the practice. He did it as soon as he found that their coach went out. "Valentine's coming. This is very very bad."
"Is it about…that cho-chocolate, captain?" Kagami asked, remembering the story from the bespectacled and Kiyoshi. "Tha- that chocolate which took you to space?!"
Everyone gulped. Space? Chocolate? They thought that those two words never appeared in a single sentence. But with their coach around, everything that should be impossible with cooking became possible.
"Actually, upon hearing the story, I wanted to taste it with Kagami-kun." Kuroko confessed, and everyone was already used with being startled as the shadow suddenly voiced out his thoughts.
"Geh!? Why do you have to include me?!" the red head exclaimed. Then, they heard the gym's door open.
"Hoho! Kuroko-kun, I'll gladly take that offer!" Riko appeared behind the opening doors, her right arm in her waist, and the left one handling a plastic with some things. "My papa delivered it for me! My best chocolate ever!"
Why?! It's not valentines yet! Everyone screamed in their minds.
"Now then," Riko dropped the bag after retrieving two small rectangular pieces of chocolate. She then dashed towards the light and shadow of the team, whose mouths were slightly opened. She took the opportunity and slid her creation into their mouths at the same time. "Yay! I did it!"
The team, especially Hyuuga, facepalmed. They saw the duo just swallowed the whole thing without chewing, since it was pushed up to their throats. They grumbled a little, and then, they dropped in the ground simultaneously.
"Kuroko!? Kagami?!" Izuki shouted, and the whole batch circled around them. Riko just kept smiling to herself.
Meanwhile…
"Kagami-kun, I'm glad I got to go to space with you." Kuroko said, looking at the Moon, while they float above the Earth.
"Shut up!" Kagami just said.
If they were not in some random shit of a space and such, Kagami thought, he might have blushed or think he was in heaven. However, this was hell. He then thought that maybe their captain and Kiyoshi-senpai were drugged into thinking that this was their coach's best creation.
III. Krypton
"Hg." Kuroko said, reading every alphabet letter
"Hydrangeas." Kagami answered in English, and he suddenly received a jab in his stomach. "Hey! What's that for?!"
"Kagami-kun, while I'm surprised you know those flowers, I believe we are reviewing elements today."
"I don't really know, sorry." The red head scratched his head.
The duo were currently in their room, Kuroko sat in his usual position in the back near the windows, while Kagami turned his chair towards his shadow's desk. They were preparing for their Chemistry exam.
"Next. Kr."
"Kuroko."
Kagami knew he was wrong, and he did not really know what element it was. He wondered why did not receive some punch or jab though.
IV. Vegetables
"Kagami, no meat?" Riko asked, looking at the set of dishes in the table. The whole Seirin team were currently lodging in their ace's house after their game with the Rakuzan.
"Ahh, sorry, I ran out of meat. And I really don't keep much here."
"What?" Hyuuga exclaimed. "Aren't you a meat person!?"
"Huh? I like vegetables though. And they're cheaper." Kagami answered honestly. He liked cooking, and vegetables are faster and easier to cook.
"Vegetables are cheap (Yasai wa yasui). That's it!" Izuki said. Mitobe laughed.
"Shut up and die Izuki. And that was very very lame, was it even a pun?" The captain stated.
Kuroko just stared in the dishes, while everyone began digging in. Kagami noticed that his shadow did not touch any food at all.
"Kuroko?"
"I don't like vegetables that much." He confessed.
"Yosh, I think I still have some bacon left here. Wait, I'll fry it." Kagami stood up from his seat, and began searching for the meat in his fridge.
The team just cried of jealousy. Why was Kuroko having meat and not them?!
V. Strip
"I'm bored…" Hyuuga stated.
"Me too." Izuki also voiced out. "I don't want to think of puns anymore."
"Good for you, but I'm extremely bored."
Because of unfortunate circumstances, it was the day the dean entered their practice at random, and Kagami missed Kuroko's ignite pass, which went straight to the old man's face, his wig was removed before he dropped to the ground. The wig in the air successfully fitted Riko's head, and everyone snickered. The dean heard the laughter, and stood up, shouting at them, "You're banned from using the gym, the tracks, and any sports facilities of this school for the week!"
"Coach, can't we practice in your gym?" Furihata said. He looked at their upset coach standing in front of the room with crossed arms like a teacher would do. Everyone in the room gaped as they saw black aura emitting from the girl. All of them were actually already sitting in the back, and they wished they could go further.
"We are practicing now elsewhere, if we could, damn it!" Riko said, clenching her fists. "But, for whatever unluckiness brought to us, the local gym was being used, and ours was currently full. The street courts were used by the XXX Middle, and the dean made sure we stay here until the night!"
"How cruel…" Koganei muttered. The trio freshmen nodded.
"That's why, since it's your fault, Kagami and Kuroko!" Riko called. "Draw a comic strip!"
Everyone was speechless, their mouths opened.
What had possessed their coach? And what is the connection of a comic strip to their dilemma?
"What for, coach?" Kuroko calmly asked, appearing beside Riko in an instant. Since they were used to it, the girl coach just jumped a little, before coughing to signal attention.
"I'm very very upset right now, so I want you to draw anything to please me."
"Why a comic strip?! And just to please you?! The hell?!" Kagami shouted, and everyone silently agreed.
"Because I said so." The coach stated, ignoring the curses.
"I agree with coach, Kagami-kun." Kuroko then looked at his partner
"Why?!"
"I like drawing." He answered, and then took a pencil and paper from his bag. "Is this alright?"
Hyuuga felt goosebumps when he saw Riko suddenly had sparkly eyes upon reading the single page comic strip Kuroko handed him.
"C-can we also read it, Kuroko?" The captain asked, and the blue head nodded. Riko gave the paper to him, and everyone gathered in his back.
Everyone just laughed out loud.
"You do the rest, Kuroko-kun!" The coach said as they left the room when it was six pm. Kuroko nodded in understanding, and his partner, who heard the conversation, just cocked his head in confusion.
The next day, the dean angrily went to the team who was currently lodging in Kuroko and Kagami's classroom and shouted at them that they could practice already.
"Kuroko, what happened? What did you do?" the red head asked as they ate dinner in Maji Burger after the practice. "Actually, I was not able to read your comic strip, sorry."
His shadow sipped a little before answering. "The story was that Kagami-kun burned his wig in the school's incinerator, and then I called Akashi-kun to ban our dean to buy new one. I recently discovered that Akashi-kun owns this school, and it was under the management of the dean."
"Seriously?! That's…fuck."
"Anyway, I noted in the strip that we are actually friends with Akashi-kun, and gave a false proof that he would agree if ever they don't let us practice. I guess it worked."
"Wow, that's amazing. I guess I was not wrong when I thought you were really angry." Kagami said. "But, why a comic strip?"
"So that we could ask the newspaper club to include it in their weekly publication. That was actually the reason why the dean finally gave up on us." The blue head said with a poker face. "And comics are a better way to get attention than a mere article, so it would have successfully spread the dean's issue."
Kagami knew not to piss his shadow, for Kuroko would go to any measure to let you know he was damn scary when upset.