Having Roommates is hard

A/N: Been reading Old Wonder Woman comics and watching the Animated Justice League. Diana's early habit of hanging out in the woods naked came to mind during Starcrossed and this is what came out. Clearly I decide to have Dick living there to. Planning on it being a one shot, but who knows. As always feedback is always welcomed.

Bruce had known that the roommate issue was going to come up at some point. There were two parts of his life meeting up, the Batman in the Justice League, and the Batman who was training Robin. The Invasion had changed the distance those two lives had. Thankfully it had happened during a school week so Dick wasn't home when they attacked. Small Miracles. Bruce thought to himself. The past few weeks with the two lives living in the House had been interesting to say the least. J'onn keep to himself, but keeping Diana out of Gotham crime fighting had proven to be harder than expected. Mostly because she won't take, no, you can't help me for an answer. Most of his nights had been keeping her in the manor and out of his hair. This was a task easier said than done.

Tonight had been easy. It had been quiet on both ends; Diana had stayed in the manor without a fight and patrol had yielded a few muggings but nothing greater. Slow nights were always welcomed. It meant more sleep. It was just a quick change in the cave and then up to bed.

Dick was ahead of him, bonding up the stairs toward bed. Bruce himself felt tired, and because of how quiet it was, was clear he was not going to be going out for the second patrol. He followed Dick out from behind the clock and toward the bedrooms. This wasn't a time to talk. It was a time to just walk to bed.

Everything was fine until they hit the first landing on the big stairs. Dick stopped dead in his tracks, his head cocking to the side as he looked out the window at something in the yard. "Dick…." Bruce started to say, and then he saw the same thing. His eyes went a little wide.

It was Diana. Only she was missing a few articles of clothing. In fact, she was missing all of them. With her back to them, she was out in the yard, completely naked as the day she was born. Her hair was cascading down her back and it was a very interesting sight in the middle of the night. She looked statuesque with her arms crossed in the air. There was nothing in her body language that made it seem like she was ashamed of her state of being and form. It was rather freeing to see someone just comfortable in their own skin. Bruce felt his brain slam the stop all thoughts button. There is a naked woman in the yard it shouted at him. Then he remembered he was standing next to a twelve year old boy who was seeing the same sight. He looked down at Dick, "Go to bed. NOW." He was going to have to have a talk with her. Great.

Dick didn't move at first. He stood there, staring at Diana, like he hadn't heard Bruce. There was nothing in the past few weeks that made it seem like Dick had a crush on her; but Bruce had a feeling now things were going to change. Bruce covered the boy's eyes and repeated himself, "Up the stairs, now." The boy shot up the stairs like a rocket and Bruce remembered that Dick's windows faced the back yard. He had to act quickly.

The night air was warm on her skin. It was a beautiful night, silent. Diana had decided to come out and enjoy it, even if Bruce won't let her. Besides, she wasn't doing anything in his city. The manor house was outside the limits and she voted she was allowed to be there. Plus it wasn't like she was fighting crime or anything like that. Just reconnecting. It had been a long time she had a chance to do that, since her banishment from the island. It was night like these the Amazons would choose to present offerings. It was night like these that remind her that she was alone in Man's world. That was something she tried not to think about.

She heard movement in the grass behind her, and turned to see Bruce carrying a fluffy Robe. "We need to talk." He said in a gruff voice. He didn't seem uncomfortable as she took the robe from him but she didn't put it on, just held it. She didn't have a problem with her nudity, why should he? On his part he was mostly trying to ignore the fact she was naked.

"Oh?" She cocked her head to the side, unsure of what he was speaking about.

"I…I..How do I say this…The boy…" Bruce shook his head to clear his thoughts, "I don't mind that you're naked, I get it, but could you do it somewhere else? Deep in the tree line perhaps? Because I don't want to have to start feeding Dick Saltpeter."

"Why would you have to feed him saltpeter? I mean, he isn't a horse, he can be reason with." She crossed her arms, "Besides, what is the problem?"

This was going to be harder than he thought. "Never mind. I don't want to know why you are out here naked, but I can tell you what I can't have happening. Dick seeing you out here, naked." She was slipping the robe on at this point, "He is a young boy….and he has urges. And seeing you naked isn't going to help him any." She had it on but hadn't bothered to tie it. This conversation was getting harder by the minute. And he sure Dick was watching.

"Urges?" She cocked her head to the side and Bruce wondered if she was just messing with him at this moment.

Bruce took a deep breath. He had a feeling that he was going to have to explain the birds and the bees to Dick now, but he didn't think he would have to do it with Diana. He had assumed that her mother had taken care of that for him, but then reminded himself that Diana grew up on an island with all women, so sex was probably something that didn't come up to often for them. At least not with men. And that got Bruce thinking on something else completely, and he cursed his male mind. He started to wonder if he needed a spoonful of saltpeter.

"It's late. And I really don't want to explain this, or argue about it. So here is the short version. I understand it is a religious thing, I realize that telling you can't do it isn't right. To be clear I am not telling you, you can't do it. But I have a 12 year old boy up stairs who is probably peeking out the window hoping for another look at you." That got her to tie it. Bruce tried to hide his amusement. She didn't like being viewed from a far it seems. Or she was catching on to his position. He was hopping for the latter of the two. "Which isn't good for either of us, if you catch my drift, so…can we agree, deeper in the tree line…out of view of the house?"

"I suppose I could….." She said, and then smiled, "if you let me help you." It was a testing of waters. She looked at him hopefully.

"I…We'll talk." Bruce answered, he didn't want to fight it about it now, before turning toward the house. Of course all deals with women are based on trades.