A/N: Hey fellow gillies, it's my very first time posting a GG fanfic so please no throwing rotten tomatoes at me just yet! This fic is one of the three Gilmore Girls stories I have been working on the last few months but the first to have a finished chapter, so hooray for me not procrastinating enough to finally get this up. I don't have the characters voices down yet and probably never will completely (I'm no ASP) but let me know what you think anyways, should I keep going or pack up my stories and head for the hills?
Lorelai studied the mirror, studied it more than she ever would. She reached up and pushed a piece of her hair behind her ear, then grabbed it back out, then pushed it behind her ear again. She ran her hand down her sides smoothing her dress then her hands went back to her hair to grab the piece from behind her ear and pull it out again. She exhaled deeply then grabbed her purse off the dresser and walked downstairs to the living room.
"Are you sure you can't come?" She asked Rory who was lying on the couch covered in four different blankets.
"I'm sure."
"Oh come on, can't you just try a little harder to feel better."
"I spent the last six hours throwing up into a Hello Kitty bowl, if it was physically possible to try harder to feel better I would have done it already."
"Ohh, I could tell them that I'm sick."
"Stop being such a baby and just go."
"But without you there I don't have my buffer, I need my buffer!"
"You spent sixteen years with them before I came around."
"Even a better point, you see how that turned out."
"Go or I will throw up on your shoes."
"I'm going, I'm going." Lorelai said then started walking to the door before she turned back. "If I'm not back in three hours, call the police."
"Stop being so dramatic."
"You're right, dinner might be nice. What do you think we are gonna have, maybe some salmon pate or duck liver mousse."
"Mommm!" Rory said covering her ears. "Get out of here!"
"Bye sweets." Lorelai said then walked out the front door.
She spent the next twenty minutes driving and coming up with prepared topics to switch to if needed, so far the only thing she had come up with was talking about volcano's since Rory made her watch a documentary on them the other day. She pulled up into the driveway and turned off her car, her eyes went straight to the door, it almost looked like it was moving further and further from her. She took one quick look in her car mirror before hopping out and walking up to the door.
"Take your coat?" The maid asked as she walked inside.
"Yes, thank you." Lorelai said handing her her coat then she looked around the house. "Are they playing an intense game of hide and seek?"
"Pardon me?"
"Nothing, where are my parents?"
"Your mother is in the living room." She said then Lorelai walked over and found her mother standing by the drink cart.
"Hey bartender, can I get some shots of tequila?" Lorelai said earning herself an eye roll.
"I got your martini ready." Emily said and handed her the drink, they both walked over and took a seat on the couch.
"So where's dad?"
"He is in Sweden for work till Monday, it is just going to be the two of us tonight." Emily said as Lorelai was taking a sip of her martini.
"I think I'm gonna need a stronger drink."
"Well sip quickly on the way to the dining room, dinner has been done for ten minutes. Clearly Rory is the only reason you make it here on time any other night." Emily said while they started walking.
"So you hear about those volcanoes, man those things are pretty crazy."
"You may bring out the food now!" Emily yelled as the two of them took their seats, they were quickly served with a couple plates of food.
"Looks good." Lorelai said picking up her fork.
"So how is that boyfriend of yours?" Emily asked then Lorelai set down her fork.
"Luke."
"I know his name."
"He is fine."
"Just fine?"
"He's good, he's great, he is having a grand ol' time."
"What? I am not allowed to ask how your boyfriend is doing?"
"If wondering how he is is the only thing you are getting at then yes, you are allowed to ask."
"It was." Emily said then they started eating, after a minute or so she spoke up again. "Christoper called this week."
"Here it is."
"What, he just wanted to say how sorry he is for what happened at our vow renewal and he said you won't take his calls."
"I'm not taking his calls because he plotted with you to breakup my relationship, and he said some really crappy stuff to Luke to that I still haven't forgiven him for."
"He only did all that because he loves you."
"Woah, well he has got a funny way of showing his love! Loving someone is wanting to see them happy no matter what, not just showing up out of the blue then throwing a tantrum to try and get your way because you are mad that you want something you can't have."
"But he could have you, you could be a family like you always wanted."
"Like YOU always wanted mom, not me. And he can't have me because I have Luke."
"You really want to throw your life away with that man?"
"I am not throwing my life away mom, Luke is such an amazing guy and you would know that if you just gave him a chance."
"He runs a diner Lorelai, he lives in an office."
"Well at least he is here unlike Christoper or even dad for that matter."
"What does your father have to do with this?"
"He isn't even here half the time, he is flying across the world and seeing new places while you get to sit at home all by yourself."
"He is making a living and you might understand that if your boyfriend had to travel further than the local butcher shop for work."
"Clearly this is something you are never going to understand so I'm just going to leave." Lorelai said and stood up from her chair.
"We are not through with dinner yet."
"You know I don't really have an appetite anymore, besides you probably have some high class tight ass event to plan anyways." She said before leaving the room and grabbing her coat, seconds later the maid walked up behind her.
"Why are you leaving so soon?"
"Well orange really isn't my color and if I stay here any longer I'm might end up in a prison jumpsuit."
"But you didn't even get dessert."
"That's fine, I don't need anything else from that women."
"But you have to take a truffle for later, it will change your whole view on everything." The maid said holding out a truffle in a colorful tin foil wrapper.
"Well if a truffle is good enough to do that I better take it." Lorelai said then grabbed the candy out of her hand. "Thank you." She said before she walked out the door.
Later that night Emily stood in her room folding the clothes she had just changed out of and setting them in the laundry hamper, she walked over to her bed ready to climb under the covers when she noticed a colorful wrapped piece of candy on her pillow, she picked it up and looked at it oddly before opening it up and taking a bite, she turned to throw the wrapper away when she noticed writing on the inside of the tin foil.
"A journey soon begins
it's prize reflected in another's eyes
when what you see is what you lack
then selfless love will change you back." She read to herself then threw the wrapper into the trash before leaving the room.
Back at The Crap Shack Lorelai returned home, after shutting the front door she lazily removed her coat and threw it onto the coat rack. She heard the noise of something falling out of her jacket pocket then bent over to pick it up, looking at it in the dark she noticed it was the colorfully wrapped truffle the maid had gave her. She opened it while walking to the couch and sitting down, she took a bite making a mmhm sound afterwards then finished the rest. She noticed the inside of the wrapper had print in it and begun to read it.
"A journey soon begins
it's prize reflected in another's eyes
when what you see is what you lack
then selfless love will change you back."
She nods it off wondering why people feel the need to write things inside of candy wrappers, you don't need some kind of puzzle. It's candy, how much more fun can it get? She shifts into a laying down position then rests her head on one of the throw pillow, looking across the room she sees the moonlight hitting one of her photos perfectly. It's the one of her as a kid, standing in front of the Gilmore house with the same expression she wears most Friday nights at that house. She sighed then snuggled up more to the clown faced throw pillow, clicked on the television and slowly closed her eyes.
Hearing the alarm go off Lorelai lifted her head from her pillow and squirted her eyes at the clock, it read 6:00 am. She shoved her face back into the pillow and mumbled "Luke, your alarm is going off… Luke!"
When there is no answer she slaps the alarm clock turning the annoying beeping sound off then rolls over to wake Luke, realizing he isn't there she sits up and rubs her eyes. When she opens them she notices she is not in her room, she is in her parents bedroom.
What the hell happened last night?
She hops off the bed onto her feet then started to walk out of the bedroom when she notices her reflection in the mirror and screams, she is her mother. She walks closer to the mirror and touches her face, moving it around hoping she would be able to pull it off and just be herself again. Looking over at the dresser she see her mothers car keys then picks them up and runs out of the room.
Once she arrives at the house she originally fell asleep she grabs the key out of the turtle and she opens the front door then quietly walks inside, she starts to head towards the stairs when she sees herself asleep on the couch.
"Man this is weird." She whispers to herself then walks over to the couch and sits down on the coffee table. She gives her mom a few shakes then her eyes open and Lorelai's hand covers her mouth quickly. "Mom, don't freak out. It's Lorelai."
Uncovering her mouth Emily just looks at her confused and says "What?"
"I don't know what is going on but when I woke up I was in your body and I guess you are in mine."
"This is one of your jokes, isn't it?"
"Yes mom, I had an Emily suit specially made just so that I could kidnap you, leave you in my house then wake you up and pretend we switched bodies."
"We're at your house?" Emily says then sits up and grabs her neck. "Why am I sleeping on this god awful couch?"
"I fell asleep on it last night."
"You couldn't walk the twenty feet to your bedroom?"
"This really isn't the time to criticize my sleeping places, we are having a crisis here!"
"It isn't possible that we switched bodies, that kind of stuff is fictional." Emily says then Lorelai hops up, goes to the bathroom and returns with a mirror, she looks at it then looks back at Lorelai. "I'm you."
"Yes."
"I'm you."
"I don't think repeating yourself is gonna change us back."
"What is going on here?"
"I am just as clueless as you are right now."
"This can't be real, I must be dreaming."
"Trust me you aren't, the pinch marks on my arm are proof of that."
"How could this have even happened?" Emily says then Rory walked out into the living room half asleep looking at the both with squinted eyes.
"I was wondering what all the noise was, what are you doing here grandma... and why are you in your pajamas?"
"I slept here, upstairs in your moms room." Lorelai said quickly hoping Emily wouldn't try to answer her question.
"Oh, I just figured mom was too lazy to walk upstairs to her bed but I didn't know you were using it." Rory said then Emily gave Lorelai the "I told you so" look. "So why'd you sleep over grandma?"
"Well your Grandpa is out of town and we had this ummm white van that has been driving around outside our house at all hours of the night so I just didn't feel very safe staying there alone so I asked your mother if I could stay here and after several minutes of back and forth she agreed."
"Okay, well I'm just gonna head back to bed now, I'll see you when I wake up if you are still here."
"I probably will be." Lorelai said then Rory walked to her room and went back to bed. "Let's go upstairs to my room so she doesn't hear us talking."
"Sure, now you are capable of walking to your room from the couch." Emily said making Lorelai roll her eyes, she followed her upstairs then they got into the bedroom and closed the door. "Alright, so how could have this happened?"
"I don't know mom, all I remember was going to sleep then bam, I wake up like this."
"Okay, let's retrace our steps, the last time we saw each other was at dinner."
"Boy wasn't that fun."
"What all happened after you left, did you have any weird feelings?"
"You mean a weird feeling in my gut like I was about to turn into my mother overnight? No, I don't think so."
"Well what did you do from the time you left my house to the time you fell asleep on the lumpy couch?"
"Well I got in my car... Then I got back out of my car and went over to your fountain and shoved a rock into the water spout."
"What?"
"Hey, I'm telling my story here.. Then I got back into my car and drove home, I stopped once on the way for gas but that's it. When I got home I came inside, ate the truffle your maid gave me then laid down on the couch and watched TV till I fell asleep."
"The maid gave you a truffle?"
"Yeah."
"And you ate it?!"
"I'm not one to turn down a free truffle."
"The maid gave me a truffle too." Emily said then they both looked at each other and gasped.
"Oh god, we should have known that someday one of your maids would put a curse on us, I just had it pegged as that one with the rabbit's foot collection."
"Didn't the wrapper say something on it?"
"Yes! I remember reading something on it about perceptive or something like that."
"We have to remember what it says, it could help us figure out what's going on."
"We just have to go find my wrapper, it's probably in the couch cushions."
"What?" Emily says looking at her strangely.
"Sometimes when I'm really cozy instead of getting up and having to go all the way to the trash bin I just shove stuff in between the couch cushions." Lorelai said then they headed back downstairs and started digging through the couch.
"Tootsie roll wrappers, coffee to go cup, some type of green food." Emily said pulling stuff out of the couch.
"I think that was part of a bagel I ate." Lorelai says and Emily throws it across the room then wipes her hands off on the throw pillow. "Ah ha! Found it."
"What does it say?"
"A journey soon begins
it's prize reflected in another's eyes
when what you see is what you lack
then selfless love will change you back."
"That is the same thing mine said.. What does that mean?"
"I'm not quite sure.. This would be a lot easier if Rory could help us, she's always good with riddles."
"Then let's ask her."
"Yeah sure, let's go tell Rory we ate a cursed truffle and now we got transported into each other's bodies. But hey, can you figure out this riddle for us."
"That might seem a little crazy."
"A little crazy? If anyone finds out they will put us in straight jackets and we will be locked inside four padded walls."
"Fine, we'll just have to figure this out on our own then."
"Alright so we have to see something we lack, something in each others eyes. Selfless love will change you back... So what we lack.. What we lack is the ability to see things through each others eyes, so our selfless act would be to.."
"Understand the world through each others eyes."
"Great, so we have to start understanding each other. It's been over thirty years already and that still hasn't happened."
"Is there any other way?"
"I'm not sure... Wait, we could talk to your maid! She made us this way so maybe she can switch us back, give us magical white truffle and change us back."
"But I fired her."
"Why would you fire her?"
"She left a truffle on my pillow, I don't live in a hotel Lorelai."
"Well is there anyway that we can still contact her?"
"I still have her number in my phone."
"Okay, call it!"
"I don't have my phone with me, I left it at the house I fell asleep at."
"We can look her number up then, the phone book is somewhere around here." Lorelai says then there starts moving stuff around looking for it when Lorelai's cell phone on the coffee table starts ringing, she reaches over and picks it up answering it. "Hey."
"Who is this?" Luke says from the other line and Lorelai's eyes widen then she pulls the phone away from her and covers it up.
"Why did I answer it?" Lorelai asks Emily then puts the phone back to her ear. "It's Emily Gilmore."
"Oh, hello Mrs. Gilmore, how are you?"
"I'm fine."
"Is Lorelai there?"
"Yes, but her hands are full, I'll put you on speaker." Lorelai says and switches it to speaker then waves at Emily to say something.
"Hello Luke." Emily says unsure how she is supposed to start a conversion out with him.
"Why are your hands full?"
"I'm ah, cleaning out my closet."
"Really?" Luke said then Lorelai covered up the phone again.
"Cleaning my closet, you couldn't have picked something more believable than that."
"You could have just said I was busy and couldn't talk."
"Lorelai, you still there?" Luke said from the phone and Lorelai uncovered it again.
"Yeah." Lorelai said then Emily quickly cut in.
"Yeah, I'm still here. So wazzup?"
"You never called me last night to let me know if Rory was feeling any better."
"Sorry, I fell asleep on the couch before I got the chance to call you."
"You slept on the couch again, we might as well put your bed in the living room."
"That's actually not a bad idea." Lorelai whispered while holding the phone away from them.
"I would probably miss the sniff neck I get from sleeping on the couch."
"So how is Rory doing?"
"She is still sleeping."
"Okay, well I'll stop by when I get the chance to bring over her mashed potatoes."
"Okay, see you then."
"Bye."
"Bye Luke." Emily said then Lorelai hung up the phone and winced at her.
"Did you really say wazzup?"
"I was nervous, I don't know how you talk to him."
"Well I don't say wazzup." Lorelai said then they started looking for the phonebook again.
"Why is he bringing mashed potatoes?"
"It's a thing he does, it's a long story."
"May I hear it?"
"When Rory was younger she had the chicken pox and she came up with this crazy theory that she would get better faster if she ate mashed potatoes and after she ate all the ones we had at the house we went to Luke's and she told him her theory and asked him if he could make some, he did and then he started bringing a big bowl of mashed potatoes to our house everyday for like a week till her chicken pox were all gone. Out of all her friends she got rid of them the fastest so she said I knew it, I knew it would work, and every time after that when she got a cold or a flu Luke would bring her mashed potatoes. She understands now that they don't actually make her get better faster but it's like a little tradition they have."
"I didn't know you knew Luke when Rory was younger, the first time I met him was at Rory's sixteenth birthday party."
"We met him when Rory was eleven, so about nine years ago."
"Five years you knew him and never brought him up."
"We really didn't talk much back then, not that we are getting communicator of the year awards or anything but it was different than how we are now."
"I guess we didn't really talk back then, aside from the occasional yams joke at thanksgiving."
"By the way I have another one for this Thanksgiving." Lorelai said laughing then Emily rolled her eyes.
"Have you found the phone book yet?"
"I know it is somewhere in this room, I just don't remember where."
"Why don't you check the couch cushions?"
"Haha." Lorelai said dryly then found the book under a stack of magazines and flipped it open. "Okay, what's her name?"
"Sophie."
"Wasn't Sophie the one blonde maid who you thought was coming to work drunk?"
"Oh yeah, maybe it was Alexander, or Abigail... Wait no, it was Tabitha! I'm sure of it."
"Alright, I'm not even gonna ask how you got to that name from the other ones. What's her last name?"
"I don't know."
"You need the full name to look someone up."
"Oh, well I don't know her full name. I know that she likes to over use pledge though."
"That's perfect, I'll just go into the phone book under pledge lovers and look for her name."
"Is it really necessary for your jokes right now?"
"You are the one who brought up the pledge."
"We can just go get my phone from the house."
"I will go get it myself, you have to start cleaning out my closet."
"You can't be serious."
"Well it won't make sense if you don't."
"What am I supposed to do if Luke comes home?"
"What do you mean?"
"You are dating."
"Yes?"
"Is he gonna want to do anything?"
"What do you think we are, animals? It's eight am and Rory is home sick."
"I don't mean like that, I mean like a kiss."
"Yeah, probably... Ohhh. Well it would just be a little peck, you could handle that."
"I have not kissed another man in forty years of marriage and I'm not going to start now, especially with my daughters boyfriend."
"Oh, pretend to be sick, Luke won't kiss me when I'm sick."
"Richard is the same way."
"Men."
"But how do I pretend to be sick?"
"Well Rory has the flu so it makes sense that I would be getting sick, maybe bring up that you are feeling nauseous and you are thinking you might have caught Rory's flu. And he knows the most contagious you are is right when the flu starts so he won't even think about kissing me, well you."
"Alright, but what if Rory wakes up?"
"She's got a good two or three hours of sleep left in her so you should be okay." Lorelai says then grabs the cars keys and starts to leave.
"And change clothes while you are there, I don't want to neighbors thinking I've gone insane and started driving around town dressed in my pajamas."
"Or I can just add a nightcap and slippers then tell them I'm going to a dress up party."
Lorelai left then Emily went upstairs to the bedroom and starting digging through the closet, after about forty-five minutes and several disapproving faces towards Lorelai's wardrobe she heard the front door open. She threw some clothes aside and hopped up off of the floor.
"Wow, that was easy to get up." Emily said to herself, amazed by how it felt to be in a over twenty years younger body then she started heading downstairs. "You better not have sped in my car!"
"What are you talking about?" Luke said walking around the corner and into the living room, holding a giant bowl of what she assumed was the mashed potatoes they had talked about.
"Sorry, I thought you were my mom."
"I don't think she took your jeep, it's still in the front yard."
"Oh well, I guess she can speed then."
"So your mom is coming back?"
"Yeah, she just forgot a few things she wanted while she stays here."
"Your mom is staying here?"
"Just till my dad gets back, she was freaked out to stay alone and she wore me down so."
"I'll hurry and get these mashed potatoes in the fridge so I can get out of here before she gets back."
"Why would you want to get out of here before she comes back?"
"You know why, and I'd rather not get the famous Emily Gilmore leerings."
"They're famous leerings?"
"You know the one, where she instantly looks you up and down and you can literally see the judgement in her eyes."
"Oh, that one." Emily said then looked him over.
"That's a really good impression.. I'm gonna go put these in the fridge." Luke said then disappeared into the kitchen, when he came back he stood next to her told her he had to get back to the diner. When he leaned in to kiss her she pulled away quickly and looked the other way, his face dropped when he looked over at her and her face was practically glued to her shoulder. "Something wrong, Lorelai?"
"Yeah, I'm starting to think I might be getting Rory's flu, I've been nauseous since I woke up this morning." Emily said then Luke put his hand on her forehead checking the temperature then let it fall to cup her cheek, Emily swallowed deeply trying not to freak out that her daughters boyfriend was brushes his fingers on her cheek.
"Why are you cleaning out your closet? You should be resting."
"I think I will go do that now." Emily said then turned to go back upstairs when he grabbed her hand and held it.
"I'll come over right after work and check on you, call me if you need anything."
"I will." She said then he gave her hand a gentle squeeze before leaving out the front door.
A half an hour later Lorelai finally returned home, she walked up the steps and into her bedroom where Emily was lying on the bed reading a magazine.
"You are already done cleaning the closet? That usually takes me two hours, three if I just went shopping."
"I was cleaning the closet but then Luke told me to lay down since I wasn't feeling very well."
"So Luke did show up?"
"Yes, and apparently I have a famous leering."
"Oh, the one where you look someone over and you can just see the judgement in your eyes."
"Yeah, that one.. I thought you said Luke was an amazing guy?"
"He is."
"Well he couldn't have gotten out of here any faster when he heard I was coming back."
"That's because you petrify him mom."
"I do not."
"He flinches when you walk by him, this is a man who wasn't even afraid of The Exorcist."
"Why would he be afraid of me?"
"Because you are the mother of his girlfriend and he cares so much about respecting you but then you treat him like he is nothing and send another guy in to break up his relationship."
"Well if he is as tough as you say he is it shouldn't bother him." Emily said then Lorelai just exhales and holds her cell phone out to her.
"Here is your phone, call her so we can end this as quickly as possible." Lorelai said then Emily grabbed the phone and scrolled till she found the number she needed and started dialing, she only got a dial tone from the other end so she tried to call again."
"It keeps making a weird sound, like a long beep sound."
"That means the number isn't working."
"Why wouldn't it be working, it's the number she gave me."
"She disconnected it, probably so she wouldn't get an angry phone call from two people she body switched."
"So what do we do now, how do we find her?"
"Go to the supermarket and wait in the aisle with the Pledge?"
"Lorelai."
"I don't know, is there anything she said to you? Like where she lived or where she hung out?"
"The maids really don't ever talk to me."
"Why wouldn't they talk to you, you are such a delight."
"Wait… I could file a police report!"
"What? If you tell a police officer what is going on we are the ones they are gonna put behind bars."
"No, we don't tell them this part but we tell them my maid stole something from me and took off. Didn't even show up for work the next day and disconnected her phone line, then I give them all the information she gave me."
"Her first name and the disconnected phone number."
"They will find her for us."
"That could actually work. What should we say she took?"
"Ahh, oh! How about that beautiful sapphire and diamond necklace with the white gold chain your father gave me for my last birthday?"
"Didn't you lose that months ago?"
"Yes, but even if they can't find her then at least I have an excuse for your father about why I don't have it anymore."
"My master."
"What?"
"Never mind." Lorelai said then they heard the sink downstairs in the kitchen start running.
"What is that?"
"It's the kitchen sink, Rory must be up. Now this is gonna be the real challenge.."