Jackals in the Night
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A/N: I got this idea after watching the movie Thirteen Ghosts. No, this doesn't deal with any ghosts. But the character "The Jackal" really appealed to me. He kind of reminded me of Nny in a way. I made Squee very bitter in this fic but I suppose I would be bitter too if I was forced to be in a mental institute. BTW, I don't talk about Pepito. I do like the little guy a lot, I just forgot about him in this fic. SORRY PEPITO FANS!
Genre: Slight Shounen Ai (if you look for it), Angst/Drama, OOC (Squee)
Disclaimer: Jhonen Vazques is the one who owns this comic; he would probably kick my ass if he knew what I was doing with it. ^^;;
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Purgatory. In biblical terms, purgatory is supposed to be the ring you are placed in before you descend to Hell—Hades. Not sure when I will descend. It's doubtful I'll ever leave this place. Perhaps, living with my parents was the purgatory…and this is the Hell. The moon's light enters through the bars. It's almost as if it's mocking me. I hate it.
In my dreams, I can see myself acting like those around me—babbling for some unknown reason—but never knowing that I, MYSELF, am insane. Oh no, it's only those around me. I'm perfectly normal. At the end of the dream, I would see The-Crazy-Neighbor-Man looking at me through the bars. He's laughing at me with some deranged look on his face. It's because he knows he is free and I am not. He's the one truly insane when I am the one who is taking his punishment. These are the dreams that haunt me since I've come here.
I've learned to fear four main things during my "stay." The first is my dreams, but I cannot stop them—so there is no way to avoid that trauma. Second are the orderlies. They believe they are god because they are sane and we are not. Our "Gods" tease the mentally insane until they lash out at some unsuspecting person or just break down crying. Then, their laughter will ensue. Laughing at us to make them feel better about themselves. For they know, if we did try anything with them—electric shock therapy will the punishment. And that's just a bitch on its own. Third, the "residents" themselves. They can seem extremely sweet and sane one moment and homicidal the next. I had to learn how to catch the changes—quickly. Getting bitten by a rabid patient is not something I would like to happen again. The final fear is the ghosts that are still around the asylum. Unlike the patients here, they don't hide their insanity. They have caused many of the "unexplainable" acts around a few cells. I fear the day they realize I can see them.
Lonely. I'm lonely. I won't deny it, but I won't ask for comfort from these people. The doctors who think they know all of our problems. The orderlies who terrorize the patients. Not even the patients will give me comfort. Not like I would want it from them anyways. Then again, it's not like I've been given comfort.
Wait. That's a lie. The Crazy Neighbor Man did. He protected me. Sure, he killed that one guy and beat my father with a plastic robot. But he did. He made sure I was safe. He told me he didn't want me to end up like him. But the way things are going, I'm not sure if I can keep my promise to him.
I hug Schmee close as I allow my thoughts to turn even more depressing. Schmee's deep-twisting voice[1] enters my head.
Squee. Don't let the sickness get you. All my hard work would go to waste. Even that stupid neighbor man tried to stop the illness. You can't let it get you.
"Schmee, I'm tired. I don't think I can stop it even if I wanted to."
But! You can't! It's not too late! IT ISN'T!
"How do you know?"
I have eaten all your sickness, remember? But the more you act like this, the harder it is to take the sickness away.
"What if I don't want it to go away."
………… You want to end up like that stupid neighbor man? We both don't want you to get sick. To have the sickness.
"…..why?"
We like you very much, Todd.
"You…like me?"
Neither I nor …Nny would do what we're doing if we didn't.
"Nny..? Who is Nny?"
Been awhile since you've heard that name, eh? Well…I suppose that idiot isn't so bad. Not as bad as these people. He's the Crazy Neighbor Man, remember?
"I've forgotten." I can feel some tears gathering around my eyes. I close them as I hug Schmee closer to my body. "How long have we been here, Schmee?"
………Years ………
"How many years?" I let my tears fall down onto Schmee's plush fur that is now a faded brown.
Seven.
"Seven…? I didn't realize it was that long." A sad smile crosses my features as I look down at my teddy bear. "Isn't that the number for Heaven."
Todd…Squee…I…
"Don't worry. I won't let it get me yet."
I allowed myself to be soothed by Schmee's talking. He really is nice when he wants to be. It's nice to talk to someone sane. Sure the orderlies and doctors claim they are sane. But like Schmee says: Almost everyone is going nuts[2]. With my sickness being eaten and these sane conversations with Schmee, I might make it out of here intact. At least I hope so.
I don't want all of Schmee's work to go without fruit. I don't want Nny to be sad because I ended up like him or worst. Nny…his name is Nny. Maybe when I get out of here…I will go and see him. He seems like such a nice guy deep down. Really…he does.
-OWARI-
C&C are welcome!
[1] I always think of Squee like Danny from The Shining. Schmee's voice is supposed to sort of be like that voice that talks to Danny. At least, that's how I picture Schmee's voice.
[2] That comes from Squee's series. Schmee tells Squee this during a dream.