Sailor Moon takes over Wal-Mart!
WARNING: This crack fic was intentional. The lack of depth is intentional. The change between english and japanese names intentional. The no plot line which leaves you feel sick over the butchering intentionally. Though know this: WE LOVE SAILOR MOON. And are not haters hatin'
This fic was though of a few years ago by me and Mermain123! She helped write!
She glanced at the mailbox at the end of her street. Her patience was running dry as she waited eagerly for the mail man to deliver the mail and her package. A one: Business Tycoon 5 1/2. The video game was only now available in America and it cost her a pretty penny or yen for that matter to buy it over seas. The young guardian of love and justice sighed and shifted in the arm-chair that faced the front window of her house. Business Tycoon was her favorite game serious. Next to the game about her that is. Usagi smiled wistfully as she looked behind her at her collection of Sailor Moon games and Merchandise. Oh how she loved her self.
All of a sudden she heard a knock on the door. Turning around, she saw the mail man at her front door knocking, holding what looked like a package. "Who's that" said Usagi's mom, poking her head out of the kitchen where she was napping.
"GO BACK TO BED YOU UNGRATEFUL WH-"usagi was interrupted by yet another knock. She raced towards the door and threw it open revealing an annoyed and half drunk Mail Man who was nursing a bottle of scotch. "MAIL!" he said throwing it at the teen. Usagi grinned and hugged the package to her chest. Oh how she had waited! "TIP" Usagi laughed and closed the door on the mail man. Once the door was closed, and the mail man left (though not before ramming into her garage with the mail truck) Usagi ripped open the package. There, beneath bubble wrap was her game. She squeed and held it to her chest and ran around in circles. Then she heard a sound. A sound of paper russtling.
There on the floor, was a piece of paper which had fallen out of the package. Usagi stopped her running, only to hit a wall. Wailing and pouting, she picked her self up then the paper. She quickly scanned the contents. "A...This is a deed to the Wal-Mart Franchise?" she snorted and rolled her eyes. "Pfff Yeah Right" she tossed the paper on to the table and then went to her room to play Business Tycoon 5 1/2
Usagi was in the land of dreams. She was dreaming of Darien/Momaru and getting rid of the brat Chibiusa. She laughed as Chibiusa was turned into a carrot and then eaten by a Rabbit. She giggled in her sleep before a hand hit her across the face. She opened her eyes to come face to face with her "daughter" Chibiusa. "GET UP AND GET ME WAFFLES" screamed the pink haired little demon, eating candy and smacking Serena at the same time. "No!" Usagi got up from the bed and flipped her desk.
Tiredly she made her way down the stairs to her kitchen where her mom and a strange man were. The man was shortish with brown hair and a stained tweed suit and long white beard. "Ah ha! You must be Sailor... Serena! or Usagi... Whatever, anyway congrats, I'm Greg!" he said grabbing her hand and squeezing it till Usagi slapped him. "Why are you congratulating me?" said the blond teen. "Because our sources...our ebay page, says that you bought the entire Wal-Mart francise!"
Usagi gasped! "Impossible, Wal-Mart is a multi-billion dollar company! I couldnt afford to buy the Wal-Mart franchise!" she said stepping back dramatically. "Nope, before you bought Wal-Mart, the entire company tanked! All our buildings were ether sold to another company or taken down. EXCEPT ONE! The one in eastern Tokyo!"
Usagi shifted in her seat as the limo drove over town taking her to, god knows nowhere. Eventually they stopped in front of a building. The building was a walmart that looked abandoned. Grass grew to the top of the walmart door frames, snakes slithered between the blades and 'Nightmare Moon PWNS SAILOR MOON' was scrawled on the wall. The letters above the doors had long since fallen down. "WELCOME TO YOUR NEW BUSINESS" said Greg slapping her on the shoulder.
There will be more... count on it.