**AN: I wrote this before 4.07 aired, it has just taken me awhile to upload it. I am also assuming that Caroline was turned after Christmas had passed, since Halloween occurred in season 1**
Christmas was always a beautiful time in Mystic Falls. The trees had already lost all of their leaves, and were trickled by droplets of snow. The river had not quite frozen over yet, but it was getting close. People had already began decorating every inch of their homes with beautiful Christmas lights, and festive decorations. Christmas was Caroline's favorite time of year. She loved everything about it. She loved helping her mother put the Christmas tree up in the living room, she loved designing a new layout for the outside decorations each year, she loved the shopping, and she loved the food. Christmas dinner was always decadent, with honey roasted ham, fresh mashed potatoes, summer squash, green bean casserole, and homemade buns, but Caroline could think of no better combination than homemade banana bread and hot apple cider.
However, this year, Caroline just didn't seem to be in the spirit of Christmas. So much had changed since last Christmas. She was now a vampire, which, in the grand scheme of things, had really not changed her life all that much, but there were little things that made this year different. The most significant of which was the food. Caroline could still eat and still taste but it was not what her body yearned for anymore. The taste of everything was not as enjoyable as it once was. Now her sustaining force was blood.
Caroline went downstairs and into the garage where the fridge that contained her blood bags was located. Her mother knew that she was a vampire, and she had made her peace with it, but she still didn't want to watch her daughter quench her thirst. Caroline had just sat down to enjoy her morning blood bag when she heard her mother call her from the living room. She called back to her, to let her know she would be there in a moment. Caroline finished off the bag, and disposed of it, and went to join her mother in the other room.
"What is it?" Caroline questioned, attitude coming off of her in waves.
"Well, good morning to you to." Liz complained. "I thought that we could get the season started by putting up the tree today, wanna help me?"
"Okay," Caroline said with a sigh, as she rolled her eyes, "just let me finish getting dressed first, I'll be down in a minute." Caroline answered dryly.
As Caroline headed back upstairs to her room she couldn't stop her mind from wandering. She had been thinking about all of the horrible things this year has brought, and she couldn't be more anxious to have it over with. She finished getting dressed and came back downstairs to help her mother with the holiday decorating. When she came in, she was surprised to see Tyler sitting on her sofa. They had not been doing so well lately- relationship wise. He had been furious with her since she had helped Jeremy and Stefan kill Chris, one of Klaus's hybrids, to save Elena. He was a friend of Tyler's, and someone who trusted Tyler to keep him safe. Since their fight about it, they hadn't spoken much. That was three weeks ago.
"What are you doing here?" Caroline asked him, with a shocked expression on her face.
"Your mom called me, she's worried about you." Tyler answered. Caroline looked around the living room, but her mother was nowhere to be seen.
"Where is she?"
Tyler stood up, and walked toward her with his eyes pointed toward the floor, he wasn't ready to look her in the eyes yet, "She left, she wanted us to have some time to talk, so she said she was going to go get some Christmas shopping done, and that she wouldn't be back anytime soon." Tyler explained, he was still angry at her, but a smile spread across his face. He knew how much Liz loved her daughter, and he thought it was sweet that she would go through all of this to help her be her happy self again.
"Oh," Caroline acknowledged. She really didn't know what else to say. In these last few weeks, Caroline had missed Tyler more than she thought was humanly possible. Which made her giggle because, after all, she was not a human anymore. It's not like this was the first time they had spent this much time apart, but this was different. When he left before, it was because he had to. This was the first time that he had been here, in Mystic Falls, and was free to make his own decisions, but still they hadn't spoken, and that was because of something that she had done. And that tore at her insides. She never wanted to cause him any pain, and yet she had.
"She's really worried about you, Caroline," Tyler continued, "she said that you haven't even talked to her in awhile, that you are shutting her out again, like before," Tyler paused, and finally looked up at Caroline, "and she thinks I can help. Have you even told her about our 'breakup'?" Tyler used fingerquotes to emphasize 'breakup'.
Caroline smiled, ok, well if he's using fingerquotes that's a good sign, she thought. She was worried that with all of the silence between them their fake breakup would turn into a real one.
"No," Caroline said in a low voice, as she sat on the love seat exasperatedly. "I haven't really felt like talking about it to anyone. Especially since," she hesitated, "Since, I am not even sure what it is anymore." Caroline knelt her head toward her knees as she finished.
"What do you mean?" Tyler questioned.
Caroline looked up, and stared at him for a long moment, he was only about ten feet away, but it felt like miles. " I mean us," She said, finally.
Tyler just looked at her for a minute. He looked down and shook his head, and said, "I don't know either, Care."
Caroline felt her heart sink, she felt like someone was stabbing her over and over, she couldn't breathe, this was it. This was her worst fear, and it was going to happen now. He hated her, and she couldn't blame him. She helped kill his friend, and then agreed to a date with his worst enemy, she deserved this. How stupid she had been to think that he would ever be able to get past all of that. She could feel tears welling up in her eyes. She tried to hold them back with all of her might, she didn't want him to see her cry, she didn't deserve his pity. That was something that she just couldn't take. But she couldn't stop them. The tears started pouring down her face, and she didn't dare risk looking at him again.
Tyler could hear her breaths increasing; he knew that he had to say something, "What am I supposed to do, Caroline?" He began, "How am I supposed to feel about all of this, I thought you had my back!" Tyler could feel his temper rising, and he didn't want to do or say anything he would regret so he took a deep breath and trailed off with a sigh, "but I guess I was wrong."
"I know," Caroline managed to choke out between sobs, "I didn't know what to do, I had to tell Klaus-"
Tyler interjected, "CAN WE LEAVE HIM OUT OF THIS?"
"HE'S IN THIS TYLER!" Caroline retorted as she sprang up from her seat, "Like it or not, Klaus is a part of this," Tyler started to speak again, but Caroline silenced him, "NO! As much as it sucks, he is. He is a part of this, I had to tell him how we rescued Elena, which unfortunately, meant I had to tell him about Chris! I am sorry Tyler," Caroline's outburst suddenly calmed, and her guilt set in again, "I am so so sorry, I didn't have any other choice."
"I don't want to go through this again, and I REALLY don't want to talk about Klaus. I have to help them Caroline! You don't know what it's like to be sired to that piece of shit! To not have control over your own life, over your own actions." Tyler replied.
"You're right! I have no idea what it's like to not be able to control your urges, that is something that is completely lost on me right? It's not like I've ever had to deal with that, right?" Caroline snapped, her courage returning.
Tyler knew where she was going with this, "This is different, and you know it!" Tyler took another deep breath, "This isn't like the struggle of becoming a vampire, you aren't a hybrid, so you don't understand. I know how difficult it is to control those urges when you become a vampire, and I know that you didn't have an easy time. I remember Caroline, I remember you telling me how hard it was when you went through it all alone. I get it! It wasn't a cake walk for you. But this-" he broke off.
"I know it's different," Caroline began, "and I know that I don't know what it's like to be a hybrid sired to Klaus, but I do know a thing or two about control issues, so don't treat me like I'm some naive little girl."
"Whatever, Care. I just know that I have to help them, and I can't help them and be with you, if I can't trust you to have my back."
"I do have your back! I have always had your back!" Caroline exclaimed, "That's the only reason I agreed to go out with him, was to protect YOU!"
That was it, the elephant in the room was out, and Tyler could feel his anger building to a dangerous level, and he knew that he needed to leave, otherwise he would throw something again. He couldn't stand the thought of the man who had ruined so much in his life out on a date with his Caroline. She was the only thing he cared about on this Earth, and Klaus had found a way to take that from him as well, and it was something that Tyler just couldn't handle. He didn't know if the aforementioned date had already taken place, if that's what the Miss Mystic Falls pageant was about, and he didn't want to know, all he knew was thinking about it made all of his anger issues, and his rage come boiling to the surface.
"I can't do this," Tyler said as he turned, and headed for the door.
Caroline didn't waste any time going after him. She used her vampire speed to get to the door, and because he was walking normally, she beat him, and blocked his way. "No, you don't get to bail on this. We are going to figure it out- NOW!"
Tyler backed away, hands in the air. "So Sit!" Caroline demanded. Tyler rolled his eyes, and sat back down on the couch very begrudgingly.
"You need to know," Caroline began, "that when I let him escort me to the Miss Mystic Falls event-" Tyler got up to leave again, but Caroline pushed him back down back into his seat, "No! You need to hear this!" She continued, "When I let him escort me, I didn't want to. There is no one I would have wanted to go with less, but he insisted! And because I owed him a date, I had to. To make sure your secret would be safe. And I'm not sorry! I know that it hurt you, but I will do anything to protect you, and to keep you safe, and if that means that I have to do some things that I really don't want to, or that make you angry at me, or that hurt you, then so be it!"
"But I don't want you to do those things Caroline!" Tyler exclaimed.
Caroline cut him off, "I don't care! IT WAS SUPPOSED TO BE YOU TYLER! Klaus wanted Jeremy to kill you, agreeing to that date was the only way I could convince him to spare your life, and if it comes down to a choice between you and any of his hybrids, I don't care who it is, you're damn right I am gonna do what I can to keep you safe. You are my first priority! It doesn't matter if we are together or not, Tyler. I will never stop trying to protect you! So when you ask me if I have your back, the simple answer is yes. I have your back, yours is the ONLY back I have! So go ahead and break up with me if you want to, end it, that's fine. But it won't stop me from doing whatever I have to, to keep you safe." She finished, and plopped down on the couch next to him with a sigh.
Tyler was speechless, he didn't know what to say. He knew that she meant what she said, because Caroline was a lot of things, but they had never lied to each other. He also knew how stubborn she was. And that nothing he could say would stop her from doing what she thought was right. He considered her words for a moment, and he realized that if the roles were reversed, he would have done exactly the same thing. He loved her so much that it didn't matter what he had to do as long as she was safe, and in that moment he started to see everything from her eyes, he felt a calm start to wash over him, and he knew he would be able to forgive her for this situation. Then her last words set in, 'break up with me if you want to, end it' but that was the last thing he wanted.
"Is that what you think I want? to end it? Why?" he asked.
"Because," she could feel the tears starting again, they had stopped when she went off on her outburst, but the strength she had gained in that moment had now disappeared, she dropped her head again, and let the tears fall as she finished, "because I kn-know" her sobs were getting harder to sustain, "y-you h-hate me f-f-for what I did."
Tyler turned toward her and took her hands in his own. He looked at her face, which was still hidden, and he waited for her to look at him, when she refused he reached up and grabbed her by the chin and tilted her face up until her tear soaked eyes were staring into his, he leaned forward to get closer to her, not quite touching, and he said softly, "Caroline Forbes, I could never hate you."
With his words, Caroline felt her heart race, she let out a soft giggle as she remembered what seemed like forever ago, when she had said those same words to him, she leaned forward into him until their foreheads touched. When he wrapped his arms around her, she felt more safe and complete than she had in weeks. For the first time she felt like everything would be ok. Tyler leaned back, and she leaned with him, they laid together on the couch in this soft embrace and eventually fell asleep in each other's arms.
Caroline woke first, she sat up slowly, trying not to wake Tyler, but as she did he let out a groan of disappointment from the absence of her body next to his. Caroline glanced at the clock on the mantel, and realized how late it was. Her mother had been gone for nearly seven hours already. She would probably be coming back any time now. Caroline turned to try to wake Tyler. He tried pulling her back to their comfortable position, but she resisted. "No, Tyler, c'mon, you gotta wake up."
"Ugh, why?" He said with a grunt as he slowly rose from his comfortable position, and sat up next to her.
"Because my mom will be home any minute now," Caroline explained.
"So? She's the one who called me here, why does it matter if I am still here when she gets back?" Tyler questioned, as he rubbed small specks of sleep out of his eyes.
"Because, if we are going to carry on with this charade, if we are really going to make Klaus believe that we are not together anymore, then no one can know it's a lie." Caroline explained, she stared at him waiting for him to agree to her terms.
"Ok, I guess you are right." Tyler yawned out the last word.
Caroline could tell he did not understand exactly what she meant, so she continued, "No one Tyler, not my mom, not yours, not even Hayley."
"What? Hayley has helped us so much in the last few weeks, and now you want me to just lie to her." Tyler objected.
"Yes, that's exactly what I want you to do, no one can know Tyler, promise me. If we ever hope to sell this to Klaus, the only people who can know are sitting in this room right now." Caroline pleaded.
"Ok, ok, fine. No one will know." Tyler agreed, "but that means you can't tell Stefan either."
"Ok, it will be our little secret" Caroline said, as she leaned in to give Tyler a quick kiss.
"When will I see you again?" Tyler questioned, "I can't go that long without seeing you again, not when we are just starting to be good again, I think we need some time just the two of us, no hybrids, no Klaus, no vampires, just you- and me."
"I think that is a brilliant idea, Mr. Lockwood." Caroline agreed to his terms, with a giggle, and leaned in to give him another quick kiss.
"Ok, how about tomorrow night? I will tell Hayley that I just want some alone time in light of our 'breakup', can you get away?" He used fingerquotes again, but this time his face was plastered from ear to ear with a huge grin, which only made Caroline smile brighter.
"Yes, I will find a way to meet you, should we meet at the cellar?" She asked.
"Ok, so tomorrow night, around 10?"
"10 it is." Caroline agreed, and Tyler pulled her in for a deep kiss, neither of them wanted to be the first to break it, but Caroline knew they were really starting to push their luck, so she took control and pulled away, "Now, get your things and get out of here before my mom gets back," she said as she gave him a playful shove.
Tyler shot her a dejected look, and sighed as he got up and gathered his phone and keys, and started for the door. As he reached the door, he felt Caroline reach for his hand and spin him around, he went in for one last kiss. They wrapped their arms around each other and became intertwined, neither wanting to let go, the kiss deepened as Caroline parted her lips to allow Tyler access, she felt the need to be with him rise up in every fiber of her being, and she knew that if she did not stop this right now there was no way he would ever leave. Caroline loosened her grip on his body, backed away, and softly whispered, "You have to go."
"Ohhh, do I have to?" Tyler questioned.
"Yes. Now! Before I change my mind, I will see you tomorrow." She leaned in to touch her forehead to his.
"Tomorrow," Tyler gasped out, slightly annoyed and barely audible. He was halfway out the door, when he paused, and turned to face Caroline, and silently mouthed the words, I love you.
Caroline was grinning again, and she felt so ridiculously happy, she couldn't help but wonder what she did to deserve such happiness, she shot him a coy look and mouthed the words back to him. And then he was gone.
*This is my first attempt at writing, so please be kind and let me know what you think**