ENTER the Lylat Galaxy, around the Milky Way, near the closest FIVE GUY'S. In the STAR WOLF RESIDENCE, PANTHER CARUSO is switching the channels on TV.
PANTHER :: "O, thine channels are like ass. Thine TV plan is like ass. O, fuck."
ENTER the leader of Star Wolf, WOLF O'DONNELL.
WOLF :: "That is because we have subscribethed to COMCAST, Panther."
PANTHER :: "Thou art a card."
WOLF :: "Nay, I am more than a card. I would dare to describeth myself as an ace, aye."
PANTHER :: "Thou art a bastard coward."
PANTHER quickly grabs the TV remote and switches channels once more. PANTHER is at a loss as to what to watch.
Suddenly, LEON POWALSKI enters the room, drenched in scalding hot coffee.
WOLF :: "O, what is this, Leon! Thou wouldst enter our domain like a wretched animal!"
LEON :: "Kindly fuck off, Wolf, thine cries are like acid falls in Minnesota."
WOLF :: "What!"
LEON immediately produces a coffee cup from his armpit, filled with incredibly hot coffee. He splashes it on Wolf's face. Wolf is not pleased.
WOLF :: "Leon, thou shalt perish."
LEON :: "Have at thee, thine mother wouldst kisseth a shite!"
Wolf and Leon begin their battle by squatting and taking a massive shite. They then turn to face their asses together, and begin jousting with their shite.
Panther cares not for ass jousting, and simply continues switching the channels on TV. Immediately, the sports channel catches his attention. It is a rousing game of football.
PANTHER :: "Aye, quitteth shitting and look at this. The Philadelphia Eagles are against the Carolina Panthers. Aye, go Panthers!"
But Wolf and Leon did not care, as they were engaged in ass jousting.
KRYSTAL enters the room, holding a football with Don Bluth's signature.
KRYSTAL :: "Panther Caroso, watashi got kisama this football signed by Don Bluth. It says 'Stay juicy'."
PANTHER :: "Omae wa mou shindeiru."
KRYSTAL immediately combusts into flames and drops dead. The football is then confiscated by FLIPPY, who then drives out to FIVE GUY'S and sells the football for 3 cents.
PANTHER :: "Nay, thine tits are worth no valuable coin."
PANTHER continues watching football, while WOLF and LEON lay dead, covered in shit.
PANTHER CARUROSO is all alone.