Disclaimer: Not JKR, dont sue.
A/N: Okay, so this is a sequel to Seeing Red, as you can probably gather from the title, and if you are reading this first I would recommend that you go read Seeing Red first, but you don't really have to, I guess. For those who aren't going to read it first, this is all from Harry's POV, and Ginny is (obviously) the girl he keeps referring to. So you can read it as a companion piece, but it makes a lot more sense if you've read Seeing Red. Also, this is set about a fortnight after Seeing Red, and he's at Hogwarts. Anyway, enjoy!
All he could see was darkness. The terrible weight of the world crushing him, completely without thought, as though he simply no longer had a presence at all. As though the immense pressure was somehow delving deep into his sense of consciousness, changing him, altering him. Somehow. He didn't really care. There was nothing that could really make him care anymore.
And, inexplicably, it was just a moment. A deep breath in, he knew, and everything would, in a moment, be gone. It took just a moment for the thought to transpire, and then another moment between thought and action. Just a moment, and still, somehow, enough.
---
It was just a moment.
---
He saw what was around him, watching the ripples of water in front of him collide with the banks of the lake. He saw how easy it would be to walk away, to forget… but he was suddenly somehow seeing her falling to the ground, broken, completely devoid of everything that made her… her. Reliving that moment, the one moment that mattered more than any other of the hundreds of thousands of moments he had experienced. What a moment to see again, and again, and again, inside your head, a never ending cycle of a body falling heavily to the ground, again, and again, and again--
--and he knew that once it started it would never stop. It couldn't ever stop.
(Maybe if he tried really hard--)
Not time, not patience, not anything could stop this coldness that crept inside, like a disease that was slowly eating away at your body, so unlike actually being cold in that you never went numb. You just stayed cold.
---
-Cold. So cold.-
---
The moment before the idea is processed, the split second before the decision is made, before the action takes place. Just another moment in a long line of moments. Moments that change your life. Life-changing moments. This moment would certainly change his life. That moment had.
He thought, just for a moment, of the sadistic kind of irony surrounding him. Alive, surrounded by people, he was alone. Dead, he would be with her.
---
Just breathe.
In.
Out.
In.
Out.
In.
Out.
(Jump)
(Sink)
Pause.
---
In.
---
All he could see was blue. The coldness of the vast peace surrounding him wasn't nearly as cold as the coldness that had filled him since that moment. Since she had left him. He was alone. But not for much longer.
---
Why wasn't water filling his lungs?
---
-Cold. So Cold.-
---
He could feel someone's lips pressed against his, and somehow, inexplicably, it wasn't her. The head of the person wasn't covered in violent red strands, but a muddy brown pile of hair. He watched the scene, somewhere above them, feeling separated from the immense iciness of his body. The brunette with bushy hair pressed against his chest, and he felt the coldness lifting for a second, somehow, inexplicably. But as she moved her hands from his chest and put her mouth back to his, the coldness came back, flooding his system, and suddenly his eyes were open and staring into the brunette's bloodshot and teary ones.
---
He felt himself roll to one side and cough out some of the water he had inhaled. He did it without thinking. He did it reflexively.
He wished he hadn't.
---
She (but still not she) had pulled him out of the coldness. Of the blue. Of the lake.
He was alive, but he didn't feel it.
He was alive, while she was dead.
He was alive.
---
-but-why-
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A/N: Please review.