They lay in near silence; their breathing was the only sound. Both heaving chests slowed to their normal steady rise and fall, and their hearts followed suit, returning to their natural pace. Soon there was only the gentle rhythm of inhale and exhale, both hyper aware of each other. Only moments ago they were in the meld; a euphoric state where they were no longer two separate people, but one being. Where both minds were tangled in each other's thoughts, unable to distinguish their own from their bondmate's. That's what they were now, right? Shepard wondered as she watched Liara breathe in the dark.
Though Liara had considered Shepard to be seasoned in the realm of physical intimacy, the truth was that neither of them had experienced anything like the meld before, and neither knew how to act afterwards. How would someone be expected to react to such a profound experience? After learning every detail about the person you loved, body and soul, without ever having been so close to anyone else? It hit Shepard, hard and heavy, that while she had been waiting patiently for Liara to set the pace of what happened next, the asari was waiting eagerly for Shepard's seasoned knowledge to tell her what to do. Feeling somewhat guilty for her silence, Shepard rolled onto her side. Now she completely faced Liara, who in her sudden discomfort had pulled the bed covers tightly over her bare skin. Was she ashamed?
Shepard searched in the dark for what words she should say, her first words since they kissed earlier in the evening; the kiss that started everything.
"How do you feel?" Shepard asked, trying to sound as sensitive as possible. She had always found it hard to connect with others ever since Akuze. That mission changed her, hardened her. When she met Liara, something about the asari brought back a part of her that she thought was long gone. She felt like herself again.
Liara took in a breath, as if about to answer the commander's question, but stopped. She too seemed lost for words, and settled for starting back at Shepard. What little light there was in the room was enough to silhouette the human, and occasionally catch her emerald eyes. She loved those eyes so much; as she had spent the majority of her life around fellow asari, the brilliant green was entirely different from anything she was used to seeing in someone's eyes. And different was good, she told herself, finally answering her partner.
"I feel different." She said plainly. "Is that… is that normal?"
Shepard chuckled softly, slightly taken aback by her question. How would either of them know what was normal at this point?
"I guess so." Shepard smiled, "I feel different too."
Liara smiled in return, but a shiver running through her body cut off her expression. Gripping the covers tighter, she tried to pull them to her even closer than before.
"Here…" Sliding one arm under Liara's neck, and the other around her waist, Shepard pulled her own body against her asari lover's. Shepard's body was warm, and Liara found herself pressing against her subconsciously. Letting her head fall on the human's chest, she discovered her new favorite place to be. Shepard softly kissed Liara's scalp and ran her fingers up and down her pale blue skin.
"Shepard?"
"Yes?"
"I lied."
Liara's confession was surprising. To her knowledge, Shepard had never heard the doctor lie to her before.
"About what?" Shepard asked, now suddenly curious about what she meant. Liara took in another breath.
"Earlier, when I told you I wasn't looking for comfort," she hesitated for a moment, "I acted as if I was not worried about Saren, but…"
"I'm worried too." The commander said honestly. After all, if she couldn't be honest with the person she just joined minds with, who could she be honest with?
"If he has the conduit, then he has already won." Liara's body trembled at the thought, and Shepard held her tighter. "Then everything will be lost, and I-"
"I'm not going to let that happen." Shepard stated matter-of-factly.
"Shepard, I just found you." Liara continued. It certainly wasn't what she was expecting, but Shepard wasn't exactly surprised.
"I know." She tried her best to comfort her bondmate. "That's one more thing to fight for." Taking her hand from Liara's waist, Shepard guided the asari's chin so their eyes met. Even in the dark she could see the glint of moisture, the tears that were beginning to pool in Liara's crystal blue eyes. Shepard's face was serious; her brow was furrowed, but not in anger. It was concern written across her face, a concern for her lover.
"We are going to stop him." She said in her commander voice. "And we're going to do it together."
Liara nodded. "We will." Her voice cracked a bit, but she sounded as though she believed the words. Shepard's stern look faded into a cocked smile, her bright green eyes filled with contentment.
"No more worrying." She told the asari, "This night is special. Savor it." She leaned in and kissed her. Liara cupped her hand around the back of Shepard's neck, ensuring she wouldn't end the kiss sooner than desired. Satisfied, they both released and pressed their foreheads against one another. In the silence Shepard whispered.
"I'm not letting you go."
Smiling, Liara returned to her favorite place, warm and safe in Shepard's arms with her head on her chest. Listening to her lover's heartbeat, she fell asleep.