The Avengers
CHAPTER 1
Clint couldn't believe it. It was impossible. Science had proven it couldn't be done. But Clint had to go prove Science wrong. Maybe it was a trick by Loki, a final goodbye present from Asguard but he was completely powerless over nature. How could a drunken one night stand with a billionaire, playboy, philanthropist lead to him getting pregnant? Over the last few weeks he had started to feel strange, getting up and being really sick, random hot flushes and even the others had started to notice a slight bump showing through his costume. Steve had joked about him eating to much cake, Bruce- not enough exercise but scariest of all was Natasha's quips about him being pregnant. Clint had begun to feel embarrassed when no matter how hard he trained or how many missions he went on, his tummy kept expanding. He had decided to go to the hospital he was so desperate but he never imagined that the doctors would discover men were able to conceive. A three month old embryo now stirred in his stomach. Clint knew he needed to tell the others, needed to tell Tony. Abortion seemed like the easiest option, and then no one would ever know. Except it didn't seem fair to not give Tony the choice; it was his DNA after all. A bitter taste filled Clint's mouth as he realised he was now Tony's bitch; the woman in their non-existent relationship. Jesus, what about Pepper? Tony would hate Clint forever if he split them up. But he had to tell someone the truth.
Clint's thoughts were interrupted as Bruce entered the room, a wild grin on his face "I just discovered a subatomic space particle from the Chitari homeworld!"
Clint smiled weakly, trying to look enthusiastically at his teammate "Ummm awesome!"
Bruce pulled up a chair beside Clint and sat down so the back of the chair was between his legs "With it we could discover a new sector of space that may open endless possibilities to curing the population of diseases and creating new nanotechnologies. This is a massive scientific breakthrough!"
'That seemed like nothing compared to the idea of a guy getting pregnant; by another guy.' Clint thought tiredly.
He sighed and shifted in his chair "Glad someone's having a good day…"
Bruce nodded energetically and spun his head around the room "Uhuh. Any idea where Tony is? I want to tell him the good news!"
Clint wished he had good news to tell Tony "Yeah, so do I Bruce. So do I."
With an unusual bounciness, Bruce leapt from his chair and practically skipped down the open corridor outside of the room. Steve poked his head round the door questioningly before quietly slipping in.
"What was all that about?"
Clint felt a sudden tension rise in his gut and he realised too late he was having a mood swing.
"No fucking clue!" he yelled, pushing past Steve with a considerable amount of strength and storming into the empty corridor; leaving a confused Steve staring after him.
CHAPTER 2
Heat pressed against Tony's lips and he was drawn out of slumber to Pepper's sweet scent. Her hair fell gently across the side of his face as she kissed him and Tony pulled her into a passionate embrace. Finally they broke away, panting slightly.
"God, you need to wake me up like that more often!" Tony chuckled breathlessly.
Pepper smiled back and cupped his head in her hands "You really shouldn't work yourself so hard Tony. You're gonna exhaust yourself!"
Tony nodded his head, trying to shake away the sleepiness. He felt strangely calm-which was unusual- and Tony longed for the moment to last forever. Brushing his fingers thoughtfully through Pepper's long hair, he contemplated over the events of the past year, mainly the formation of the Avengers and a few of the odd moments that had followed. His heart skipped a beat as he remembered his 38th birthday party when he and the other Avengers had gotten completely wasted. That was the night he and Clint had…a moment. Well more like an entire night. Tony was scared at how much the memory pleasured him and how neither he nor Clint had ever admitted to one another how great it felt. A deep sense of guilt washed over Tony as Pepper's hands slowly slid down his bare chest in a symbol of affection.
"Tony, are you okay?"
Tony forced a weak smile and brought an arm around his girlfriend, pulling her tighter against him with a loving squeeze. She giggled softly and settled under his arm, her head resting on his chest. Tony couldn't help the pounding in his chest; he felt so…dirty, like some scumbag who had cheated on his girlfriend. 'Oh wait,' Tony thought sarcastically 'I am a scumbag who cheated on his girlfriend.'
Pepper lay peacefully beside him, unaware of Tony's internal battle of morals. Should he tell her? How would he tell her? What would she do? The endless questions buzzed angrily in Tony's brain and his head span as he tried to think ahead, think of the future. He claimed to be a futurist but at the moment Tony felt trapped in the present, unable to escape the powerful aching in his heart. He felt so…alone.
CHAPTER 3
Clint stood in the lobby of Stark Towers, aimlessly staring at the desk, where a quite attractive young woman sat idly tapping at a keyboard. He tried to breathe deeply and calm his racing heart but every time he tried he felt his stomach do flips. Trying to look as casual as possible, Clint approached the desk. The young woman glanced up and smiled.
"Welcome to Stark Tower. How can I help you?"
"Ummm…can I see Tony Stark please?"
She frowned and rolled her eyes "I'm sorry, I know you must be a big fan and I'm sure Mr Stark really appreciates it, but he is incredibly busy at the moment."
Clint couldn't help but glare at her "No! I am definitely not a fan!"
"Of course you're not. Let me guess you're secretly an Avenger in civilian form." she replied sarcastically, the corners of her lips twisting upwards slightly in a patronising smile.
Clint tilted his head "Well actually…yeah."
This seemed to aggravate the woman and she slammed her hand on the desk sharply, fire bolts shooting from her eyes.
"If you don't leave now I will be forced to call security."
Clint clenched his teeth in frustration and gave a tight smile "Go ahead…I'm still gonna see Stark."
The lady pressed the alarm in a sudden, brash movement and in seconds a couple of guards were hurrying towards Clint, hands on the Tasers of their belts. To any normal person, the sight of two six foot goons who looked like they may even rival Captain America in muscle size –nearly anyway- would have been incredibly intimidating. However to Clint, all he could think was how fun this was going to be- it would be fun to mess with some civilians. He was in the mood for a bit of exercise, seeing as his normal training regime had been disturbed by the unforeseen circumstance that was the entire purpose for him being here. The men towered over Clint but he just stared up at them defiantly, straightening his posture and making himself look as big as possible.
"Is there a problem, sir?"
"Nope. Just wanna go see Mr Stark."
The two men raised their eyebrows at each other, and then turned back to Clint, reaching past to grab him by either arm.
"I'm afraid you'll have to come with us…"
Clint felt the adrenaline pulse through his body as time slowed and focus descended upon him. He was now in total harmony with both mind and body, something a few monks in Budapest had taught him; that and the Jolan fighting style and breathing techniques.
"I don't think so…"Clint whispered, barely audible.
The entire lobby had gone silent, interested by the action from the two security guards and expecting some desperate soul to get dragged out kicking and screaming. What they didn't expect was a professional assassin taking on two men who had barely ever had to do anything more than a couple of training fights. The fight was quick but dramatic and the guards didn't even have time to yell as they were knocked across the room. Clint turned back to the girl.
"How about now?"
The girl's jaw hadn't left the floor since the beginning of the thirty second fight but there was a glint of confidence in her eyes. Suddenly arms grabbed Clint, pulling him backwards in a swift, painful motion. The floor collided with Clint's face as he was smashed downward by five or six guards who had heard the commotion. On instinct, Clint moved, twisting round and causing the men to lose their grip on his leather jacket. He gave a sharp tug on a shirt and the entire group lost their collective balance, toppling to the ground but Clint was already up taking a fighting stance and subconsciously extending his bow from its hidden position as a belt. He aimed toward the nearest guard and pulled a tiny arrow like structure from one of the small compartments in his jacket. Somehow Tony had designed the arrows to unfold-much like his bow- so they were easier to carry. The tiny arrow unfurled with a cylindrical pressurised top; one of his specialised arrows that could incapacitate or kill in anyway Clint pleased. There was a whooshing sound behind Clint and he rolled, spinning to face his enemy in a crouch, before releasing the arrow with expert precision. The arrow was right on target, hitting the figure in his chest just above the heart- a more or less non-lethal shot.
Iron Man was blasted back as the explosive arrow connected with his armour and he flew through the glass window behind him. Clint was overcome with a sense of guilt but also pride as he stood up slowly, watching Iron Man try to get back to his feet. Iron Man walked through the shattered glass with a slight stagger, his face mask lifting up to reveal a very dazed looking Tony Stark.
"What the hell was that?!" Tony looked up at Clint and realisation crossed his face "You shot me!"
"Yeah I did, now grow up and stop whining; I need to talk to you."
Clint was already turning away, his bow folding and sliding around his skinny waist. Clint felt his heart beat quicken as he realised the enormity of what was about to happen. Trying to keep his face placid, Clint nodded triumphantly to the woman behind the desk, whose jaw hung open perpetually. Then the shiny elevator doors opened quickly in front of him and Clint stepped in, leaning against the rail casually. Tony just stood there in awe and Clint felt a hint of frustration flash through him.
"Are you coming?"
A deep shade of pink flushed across Tony's face, and he nodded his head sheepishly. It reminded Clint of the morning after…the deed…when Tony had ranted about nothing, embarrassed. It was actually kind of cute. Clint scolded himself for thinking such thoughts and bowed his head to try and hide his hot face. He was not gay. He couldn't be. Not that there was anything wrong with being gay but…
Clint's thoughts were interrupted by the armour's heavy footsteps on the smooth metal floor. He looked up to see Tony staring at him, his eyes twinkling brightly.
"Well, let's go then."
This would not be easy.
CHAPTER 4
Tony's head was still spinning from Clint's explosive arrow and he rubbed his head carefully. Jarvis was speaking to him but Tony ignored the disembodied voice and focussed on the young man in front of him. Clint seemed to distance himself from Tony, his face oddly expressionless, the normal twinkle of humour no longer shone in his bright blue eyes. He had an unusual stance, hand gently resting on his stomach, thumb around his belt, staring idly at the flawless metal underneath their feet. The elevator reached the penthouse and the two of them stepped out, Tony's armour breaking up and flying to one of the repair chambers for Jarvis to worry about. God, Tony loved having a computerised Butler, even if he did complain way too often about everything Tony did. Tony glanced back at Clint, who had awkwardly sat down on one of the pristine, white leather couches in the centre of the room. The last time both of them had been alone in the same room was that night. Broken memories from the drunken haze, swirled around Tony's head and he felt a strange need to tell Clint how he really felt. Now was the perfect opportunity with Pepper away at work and Jarvis running diagnostics on his armour. 'Come to think of it,' Tony thought slowly 'why was Clint here?'
As if on cue, Clint finally looked up "You might want to sit down…"
Tony eyed him curiously, toying with the idea of refusing but judging by the grim look on Clint's face and the fact he shot him with an arrow and almost completely overloaded his armour's circuits, decided against it and sat down confidently.
"So what is this about?"
"You remember that night, three months ago…"
Tony pulled back slightly "Look Clint, I'll admit it was fun…but I just don't swing that way. But I can understand why you've come back for more…they all do."
Tony winked, trying to stop the pink heat from reaching his face.
Clint looked at Tony sincerely, his face pale and eyes wide "Tony…"
CHAPTER 5
"You're pregnant!"
Oh dear, not a good start. Clint thought nervously, biting the inside of his cheek. Tony looked shocked more than angry but yelling it from the top of his voice, didn't make Clint feel any safer. More likely Fury had bugged this room months ago, and had a constant feed running to keep an eye on the billionaire, playboy, philanthropist. Tony surged upward and began pacing the room, running his fingers through his dark, styled hair. Upon reaching the window he spun round again.
"Are you sure?"
"Yes."
"Absolutely sure?"
"Yes Tony, I wouldn't have come to you if I wasn't completely certain!"
Tony began pacing again, back and forth in front of the large window. He seemed to be having some kind of mental breakdown.
"But it's not possible! You are biologically unable to have children! Science has proved that!"
Clint breathed calmly, trying to quieten his thumping heart "Look! I know ok! But after everything that has been happening lately, anything seems possible! New York proved that magic exists! Gods exist! Heck Thor is living proof of that!"
Tony froze at the mention of New York and his entire body began to shake "Oh now you've done it! Don't mention New York! It gives me anxiety attacks and that is not cool!"
"And me being pregnant is?! I don't see you having an attack about that!"
Tony bowed his head, breathing deeply as he struggled to force air into his lungs.
"I only had a massive heart operation a couple of months ago and you're worried that I'm not panicking over you being…you know…"
Clint sighed deeply, a deep frown eminent on his sharp features. His head throbbed and Clint rubbed his temple absentmindedly, trying to spread the pain from the specific point.
Finally Tony broke the awkward silence "We are never gonna hear the end of this, you know? The star spangled man with a plan will never let me live this down and Banner will probably want to run all kinds of weird tests on you."
Clint chuckled half-heartedly and looked up, unknotting his eyebrows slightly. "Yeah, I guessed that. Tasha is going to be unbearable! After all those stupid jokes, she actually turns out to be right."
Tony smiled slightly, then he paled and his eyes widened "Jesus…how do I tell Pepper?"
"Tell me what?"
The two men spun round to see the skinny ginger standing in the doorway, a clipboard in hand. Behind her stood a number of men dressed in fancy, business suits, obviously here on business with a curious look on their faces. Clint's jaw almost dropped, even with his spy training to never show reaction but he could feel himself blushing furiously. Tony walked purposefully toward them, giving them his most confident, winning smile.
"Excuse me gentlemen but I'm afraid our meeting has to be postponed. Ms Potts and I have an emergency engagement that requires our full and immediate attention."
He ushered them out, ignoring their protests and grabbed Pepper's elbow, pushing her onto the couch. She was so confused she was speechless and made no attempt to fight Tony as he crouched down in front of her, so their eyes were level.
"Pepper, I need to tell you something, just please don't interrupt. You're not going to believe this but…"
CHAPTER 6
Tony hated his life right now. Why couldn't he have just been Iron Man constantly, flying around, saving the girls, reaping the glory but no…his life had to be more complicated than that. Clint was pregnant, like proper guy on guy action from some weird, creepy fanfiction made by two teenage girls in their lunchtimes.
IRL:(H:One of whom is incredibly bad at spelling but makes up with it by her staggeringly good looks ){M: Who is also very naggy about my punctuation and grammar, now shut up I'm trying to write in the narrative action here! Apologies readers for Heather's lack of a social life}
Pepper had taken the news pretty badly as expected and had ended up running out the room with tears in her eyes. She obviously felt betrayed by him but after he had flown across half of New York to find her and tell her how sorry he was and explain how he felt she seemed to calm down. Right now, she was sat with Clint in the bedroom having a conversation about events and how this was going to work out. Pepper was a lot more forgiving and sympathetic with Clint especially as he was so rattled by his pregnancy and felt incredibly guilty about what had transpired between Tony and Pepper.
Tony almost felt envious of Clint. Why couldn't he be pregnant? Then Pepper wouldn't be so…No words came to mind to describe how Pepper was behaving but Tony shrugged it off as a 'girl-thing' and banished the thought from his mind. Clint was pregnant, for goodness sake; this was not what Tony had imagined happening when he joined the Avengers. Heck, Tony never imagined this ever happening in his entire life and he was a self-proclaimed futurist. His phone bleeped angrily in his pocket and Tony slid the device from his pocket.
"Sir, incoming communication from Director Fury." Jarvis drilled absently.
Tony rolled his eyes tiredly "Duh, I swear he's the only one who ever calls me nowadays…can you please just tell him I'm unavailable right now."
There was a moment of silence then Jarvis continued "Sir, he is being quite persistent."
Tony sagged and sighed heavily "All right then…" He spun on his heel as the image of a black man with an eye patch flashed in front of him "Fury, how may I help you?"
Directed Fury narrowed his eyes at him "You suddenly flew across New York this afternoon with no warning. I sent Cap and Widow to check if you needed any help, knowing how you're pride often gets in the way. They said they saw you leave with Pepper in your arms but that she seemed pretty rattled. Any explanation, Mr Stark?"
Tony smiled patronisingly "Well it's nice to know Cap's got my back when I fly across the city to get my girlfriend after a domestic dispute, however I feel he would have been slightly more helpful if he had…I don't know…helped me save the President when he was kidnapped or stooped the terrorist who blew up my house and almost killed me! But you know; I'm sure relationship advice from a man from the 1930's will be really helpful, and we all know how dangerous Pepper is in one of her hormonal moods!"
Fury raised an eyebrow "It's not her time of the month, Tony."
Tony felt his jaw drop for a second in awe "You know when my girlfriend is on her period! Even I don't know that! And I'm her partner! Not to mention how creepy that is…" he shivered violently.
"I also want to know why Agent Barton is also in your residence and that he was there when Pepper and yourself were having…relationship troubles…" Fury said slowly, his head tilting slightly as he spoke, his face emotionless.
Suddenly Fury asked "Is Pepper having an affair with Hawkeye?"
Tony jumped slightly at the question "What?! No! Definitely not!"
A suspicious frown crossed the director's face "Tony, I need to know these things. The Avengers are my responsibility along with their safety, I won't have you risk yourselves and make bad decisions in some silly personal vendetta."
Tony felt himself freeze, he was normally good with lies and shrugging off serious conversation but his mind drew a blank and Tony just stood there, silently gawping at the super spy with an eyepatch.
Fury waited for a response and when none came e spoke again "I know Clint visited a hospital in Switzerland two days ago, now I can't seem to find out why, or what condition he's in so I suggest you get him to come out here and join us right now."
It was obviously an order rather than a request, and so Tony nodded feebly before calling "Clint, can you come out here please?!"
The door behind him slid open quietly, and Clint stepped soundlessly beside Tony. Tony noted his sudden pale complexion and wondered how he kept so expressionless, the young man's features relaxed and blank, though his bright eyes betrayed a hint of fearful caution. Clint respected Fury greatly and knew his skills and expertise. Keeping current events hidden from the superspy would be incredibly difficult, and Tony debated telling him right there and getting it over with.
"Agent Barton," Fury addressed the assassin nonplussed "What were you doing in a Swiss hospital two days ago?"
The agent hesitated for a second his eyes never meeting Fury's "I was…investigating a rather personal matter, sir."
Tony smiled brightly, his blinding white teeth flashing.
"See, everything is fine here, now if you'll excuse us."
The line out and both Tony and Clint sagged and released a mutual sigh of relief. Suddenly Clint began giggling madly, putting his hand to his mouth to cover up his smile. Tony couldn't help but laugh and grin back.
"What?"
Clint paused, bowing his head in an effort to stop laughing "It's just…I don't know, that was really funny to me-especially how Fury's got the complete wrong end of the stick here."
Tony frowned "You were listening?"
Clint looked at him with a look that said 'seriously?' "I'm a highly trained assassin, I know everything, it's my job, though granted not as much as Fury. I mean he knows when Pepper's monthly's are, I draw the line at sex."
Tony's eyes opened widely in realisation "You mean you know when…me and Pepper…you know…"
Clint nodded mischievously "You're actually pretty predictable, you have like a natural time table-approximately every Tuesday and Friday at six o'clock but when she gets back early you often…work out your mutual stresses."
Tony was speechless-which was exceedingly rare-and felt his cheeks flush a hot, violent pink. He smoothed his messy hair back slowly, turning away to avoid looking at Clint's smirking face.
"Well umm I think I'm off to bed, you know being a billionaire, playboy, philanthropist takes a lot out of a guy! We'll make a plan of action tomorrow…goodnight Clint."
"Night,Tony."
Tony began to walk away then, realising something turned back, and came up close to Clint. He placed a gentle hand on the young man's stomach and whispered quietly.
"Goodnight, my little Iron Man…or woman…"
Then flounced off to his bedroom, avoiding Clint's gaze and shut the door without another word. Tony put his ear to the door, straining to hear if Clint had reacted in any abnormal way.
He could have sworn he heard Clint mutter "Well that went well…but I guess as a 'billionaire, playboy, philanthropist' you have to be able to adapt quickly to any kind of situation…including sudden male-colleague pregnancy."
The sentence was followed by the soft padding of footsteps and the gentle click of a door lock. Tony smiled to himself then moved away, satisfied with Clint's reaction.
CHAPTER 7
Clint twiddled his thumbs uncertainly, watching the other Avengers settle in their seats as Tony entered the conference room aboard the Helicarrier. Subconsciously putting a hand on his stomach Clint realised this was it, the moment of truth. He breathed heavily, trying to calm his hammering heart; deciding he would rather go on a hundred, undercover missions than be in this room, with these people. Something kicked inside his stomach and Clint was unsure whether it was actually the baby or just nerves.
Steve was leant back in his chair opposite, staring curiously at Clint, obviously wondering why he looked so stressed and un-Clint-like. Bruce sat beside him, his full attention on the iPad in his hands that showed all kinds of charts and scientific information. Clint had to chuckle as he noticed Tony hovering over Bruce's shoulder, reading the screen and nodding in agreement. He hoped the baby would inherit the brains from that side of the family. A hand brushed against Clint's shoulder and he jumped, startled, as Natasha slid elegantly into the seat beside him. God, she was gorgeous and Clint felt his heart do a little hop as she smiled at him. Now though there was no chance of them ever having a relationship together like Clint had been wishing for, for a long time now. Seeing the nervousness in Clint's eyes, Natasha leaned closer, her sweet perfume filling Clint's nostrils.
"Are you okay?" she whispered hesitantly, putting a reassuring hand on his shoulder.
"I'm not dying if that's what you mean." Clint deadpanned, trying to control his expression.
She glanced wearily at the others "Do you know what this is about?"
Clint stiffened, grinding his teeth together anxiously and bowed his head, turning to face everyone else. He felt Natasha frown at him and fall back into her seat, spurring on a quiet conversation with Thor. After watching Clint's correspondence, Tony cleared his throat, flashing an apologetic glance toward Clint and stepping past to the head of the table.
"Jarvis, activate lockdown sequence and send the EM pulse through the room at the exact frequency I gave you." He commanded plainly, the entire team turning to face him inquisitively.
"Commencing operation command 'Stop Nosy Spies' sir, process will be completed in five-point-six seconds."
Jarvis's voice was so calm and matter of fact that it made the sentence all the more humorous and Tony's face flushed with embarrassment as those around him chuckled.
With an awkward sigh Tony managed "Thank you Jarvis"
"Process complete. Your welcome, sir."
Tony smiled weakly before once again raising his hands dramatically and bellowing in a deep, loud low voice.
"My fellow Avengers-"
"Stop with the dramatics 'Martin Luther King' and tell us what the hell is going on?!" Steve interrupted.
Everyone looked at him quizzically, their eyes wide in surprise at the second world war soldier's sudden outburst.
"Who is this King you speak of? Is he a great warrior of the America's?" Thor asked, his voice thick with confusion as he tried to understand their odd references.
The other Avenger's ignored the demi-gods question and Steve looked between them and shrugged his shoulders "What? I've been reading up!"
Tony coughed and tried to regain everyone's attention "Well Mr 'Star-Spangled-Man-with-a-plan', Clint and I have…an announcement to make."
Clint cringed and bit the inside of his cheek nervously, joining Tony at his side. There was no going back now.
Clint turned to Tony for reassurance but he just looked at him sympathetically, silently urging him to break the astonishing news to his teammates. With a deep sigh, Clint put on his bravest face and looked up at his friends' curious expressions.
"I'm pregnant."