Hey y'all! This is my first fanfic of this account (used to have an old one when I was younger with worse stuff lol!). I was watching the show last night and just came up with the idea: "If I were bored, what would I do in Cackle's Academy?" So this is a fic of my ideas! I have another fifty two ideas for after this one. So would you please review and maybe come back to read chapter two when I post it? It's funnier than this one! Thanks! Hope you enjoy! =) Please review! If you do, I'll give you a cookie! .
Quick note: Apologies if I write in this kind of form: Action, dialogue, action, dialogue, etc. I've been writing scripts for the past six months and am just adjusting to writing in this book format again. Being narrative is something which I've been out of practice on for quite a while. =)
Chapter 1:
Prank Calls
The sun is bound for its setting stage at Cackle's Academy on a chilly Saturday in the month of November and the atmosphere in Cackle's Academy is nothing that doesn't live up to its expectations. Miss Hardbroom the scary, tall, dark and skinny teacher storms through the corridors like train on tracks, holding her lantern as usual, seeking out girls who are breaking the rules or trying to have a good time.
Truth is Miss Hardbroom isn't in the best of moods. Well, is she ever? She sometimes gets into a mood, so peevish, that even two second years, Fenella and Griselda, know not to mess with her. They know even not to sneak out of their rooms into the library to have their usual evening read.
The usual structure of these evenings was that once Miss Hardbroom had passed their rooms, they would quietly sneak to each other's rooms. This wasn't against the rules. The only reason that the girls generally stayed bound between four walls and a non-glassed windows was because Constance Hardbroom was a force to be reckoned with, and when she wasn't in the mood to be bumping into girls scurrying through the corridors then you knew better than to cross paths with her.
Most students accepted this general rule, without argument, who would be brave enough to take on Constance Hardbroom? But this particular Saturday, two girls had, had enough, two girls who without rebelling or reading drove them insane, Fenella Feverfew and Griselda Blackwood.
"I am soooo bored!" Griselda moans as she hurls onto her bed. She sighs as she stares up at the damp ceiling. Fenella is sitting beside her reading a book. She smirks as she closes it and turns to face her friend.
Fenella was quite used to Griselda when she was bored. Itching to cause trouble and have a laugh. Being mischievous was like a drug to Griselda, when she couldn't indulge, her relapse symptoms would include moping around, moaning and being a little annoying.
"So am I," Fenella replies sombrely.
Usually amused by Griselda when she's in that type of mood, she too was feeling the pong of monotony in the air and was two itching to create trouble for themselves.
"Can you think of anything we could do?" Griselda moans as she sits up and rests her head on Fenella's shoulder, like a child does when it's feeling restless or can't get what they want and are sucking up.
"Um...I suppose we could check on Millie and the gang to see what they're up to."
"Hmmm...good idea. At least if they're bored too Millie might do something stupid to entertain us."
Fenny smirks as she stands up. She stretches her body a little, indicating that she'd been sitting down a while. Griselda gets up slowly and both girls approach the door.
****
IN MILDRED'S BEDROOM
The boredom bug of Cackle's Academy hasn't broken its way into Mildred Hubble's gang quite yet, for Ruby yet again has created another contraption, and for the girls, this one is her best yet. Perhaps it's lucky for them that they're emotionally blackmailed into being held captive in a bedroom, for HB will not be taking this off Ruby.
"So who are we gonna call?" sighs Enid. It's apparent that they've been debating for some time.
"I don't know. The only people I can think to call are my parents," says Millie softly.
"Oh grow up! That's no good!" snaps Enid.
"Well have you got any better ideas?" Millie snaps back.
They argument is interrupted by three slow, melodic thumps on the door.
"Hide it, quick!" exclaims Ruby in a whisper as they scurry around the room.
It appears that they don't quite know where to hide it. After a minute or so they settle for putting it into the drawer beside Mildred's bedside table. Once it's safely out of sight Mildred mopes over to the door, wearing a guilty expression on her face, though it quickly turns to a smile once she opens the door.
"Oh Fenny, Grizz, sorry, we thought you might be a teacher! Come on in!" Millie smiles.
The two girls give each other their signature smirk before walking in. As they're walking in Ruby pulls out her invention.
"What's that?" asks Grizz, looking intrigued at the shiny hand-held machine.
"It's a mobile phone. I powered it so it would generate energy from solar power, and I managed to hack into a signal, so I can call people free of charge," Ruby smiles proudly, walking over to Fenny and Grizz.
She hands it to Grizz and she checks it out. She smiles as she looks over the phone. A/N: It's not as small as today's phones but it'd be close enough. Think of the size of a handheld, landline phone. =)
"That's so cool," Grizz says, handing it back to Ruby.
"Thanks, but we still haven't decided who to call with it yet."
"You know that the school got a new phone yes?" Fenny says, looking at Grizz.
"Yeah," she grins, with ideas filling her head judging by her facial expression.
"Let's prank call the school."
"Oh yes! Why didn't I think of that!?" exclaims Enid.
"No, we can't!" Millie cuts in.
"Oh, why not!? You're always the same!" snaps Enid.
"They'll recognise us and take the phone! You know they will!"
"Oh no they won't, we've got just the thing," Grizz cuts in before the argument becomes loud enough for HB to hear.
"What is it?" asks Millie.
"A voice changing potion. We can assume the voice of anybody we like. They'll never guess it's us," Fenny says.
"Shall I go get it then?" Grizz asks.
"Yeah," replies Fenny.
****
Once Grizz arrives back with the potion, Fenny drinks it immediately. She then dials a number into the phone, and Ruby presses a button to ring it.
"Who are you gonna be?" asks Maud.
Fenny shakes her head and smirks.
Ruby quickly presses a button so that they can all hear what's being said on the other end.
"Cackle's Academy, Miss Cackle speaking, how may I help you?"
"Ah good day Miss Cackle!" Fenny says in the voice of the Grand Wizard. They all try to suppress laughter.
"Oh, Your Honour! I wasn't expecting you to call! How may I help you?"
"I was actually wondering if you could connect me to Miss Hardbroom?" she asks.
A/N: I'm referring to the Grand Wizard voice as Fenny, so I'll be saying "she".
"Oh...why yes of course Your Honour," Miss Cackle replies, sounding confused and perhaps a little disappointed.
Miss Cackles puts down the phone and we hear a door opening.
"What are you doing!?" Grizz whispers in exclamation.
"You'll see," replies Fenny, grinning again.
There are another few moments of silence and then the phone is picked up.
"Hello?"
"Ah, good day Miss Hardbroom! It's me, Egbert Hellibore."
"Oh, your Honour, how may I help you?"
"I was hoping to talk to you about...school affairs," she replies, trying to suppress laughter like the rest of the girls.
"Yes, of course Your Honour. How may I be of service?"
"Well, I was wondering about um...ideas?"
"Ideas? What sort of ideas are you contemplating, Your Honour? Might it be best we meet for such a conversation? And perhaps include Miss Cackle in our negotiations?"
Fenny almost breaks down in laugher but manages to compose herself.
"Yes that would be best...though I find, at times, Miss Cackle can be a little bit demanding".
"Really? Well, I find her quite laid back."
"Miss Hardbroom! I'm amazed you and Miss Cackle have been acquainted with each other on that level!"
"Really? Well I am the deputy head; she pays me to do it."
"Miss Hardbroom! I never knew you were into that type of thing!"
Fenny holds the phone away from her for a moment as she starts laughing. The rest of them do the same. It appears they've just gotten the joke. And judging by a few of their facial expressions, they're a little bit disgusted at the thoughts.
"Your Honour, we are speaking of academics, yes?"
"Oh! Uh...of course! I knew you meant that!"
"Your Honour, excuse me if I'm incorrect but I sense something atypical going on. What was the purpose of your call?"
"I was wondering did you have any free time today. So we could communicate in person."
"For what purpose do you wish to meet me, honesty this time, if you may?"
"Well, I was wishing to court you."
Most of the girls cover their mouths and bend over, laughing quietly. Griselda looks as if she's about to burst into tears from laughter.
They all can't suppress their laughter for much longer. Fenny puts her hand over the part of the phone you speak into. She smirks and shushes them all.
"...I...I...I don't know what to say," speaks Miss Hardbroom like she's just seen a ghost.
"So, are you interested? If you wish, we could bring Miss Cackle."
"...How dare you, Your Honour! Frankly, I expected way more from you! What would make you think I'd wish to court you!! Or Miss Cackle for that matter! You have been way out of line! Goodbye!"
The phone hangs up. They all explode with laughter. So much so, the room begins to shake.
"Oh, my God!!!!" Grizz exclaims.
"That was brilliant!" exclaims Jadu.
"Extreme!" adds Maud.
"How's she gonna react when she sees him next?!" asks Ruby.
"Well, I don't wanna be around for it," Millie says.
"I do!" Fenny and Grizz exclaim in unison.
Then the bell rings for assembly.
"You don't think they know it was one of us, do you?" Millie asks worriedly.
"Nah, how would they know?" Enid says as she heads towards the door.
They all slowly get up, a few holding their stomachs, most likely from laughter and slowly make their way out the door.
****
They are all sitting in the assembly hall, chatting. After a few moments Miss Cackle stands up.
"Girls, girls. Quite please. I've called you all here this evening to make a fantastic announcement. I just received a letter from the Grand Wizard and he's announced that he's coming to give you all a talk. I want to relay that you should all be on your best behaviour when he's here."
Fenny and Grizz, who are sitting next to each other as usual, start laughing quietly to themselves.
"He didn't tell us what the lecture would be on, but it must be a good surprise, he never mentioned a thing on the phone. Did he, Miss Hardbroom?"
Miss Hardbroom suddenly looks pale again.
"No, he didn't," she says sharply.
"Okay then, please return to your dormitories and we'll see you for supper today."
Everybody gets up and the gang gather together.
"Well, looks like our wish will come true after all," Grizz smirks.
"It wasn't a little bit cruel was it?" asks Maud.
"After what she's put me through since I got here! No way!" exclaims Millie.
They all laugh again.
"Fenny and I are going to the library while Miss Hardbroom is distracted. Anyone wanna come?"
"No thanks," they all say.
"See you later then," Fenny and Grizz both say as we walk away. Griselda apparently in a much better mood than before.
Okay, well that's chapter one! Just so you know, all of this story won't be innuendos. That'll only be this chapter actually. The next ones will contain some slapstick humour, verbal humour and situation humour. =) The next chapter will be titled opposite day which is a combination of a game I used to play with people when I was ten & eleven, combined with supernatural for some hilarious comedy! Please, please review, I'm dying to know what people think of this! I'll be updating soon! Thanks all! .