Disclaimer: I don't own it, sadly.

Warnings: SLASH! JPSB Variety! OOC Lily. I took serious liberties with her character here. Oh, and AU-ish.

--I love this pairing. Sorry about Lily's character. I mean I didn't mean to make her like this. She just happened to be in the way. Ah, well. The casualties of slash pairing.

Play Pretend

Lily Evans always liked to play pretend.

When she was a little girl she used to pretend she was a princess. She'd wait and wait for her knight to come. She knew he'd come one day, but until then she was content to stay and play with dear Severus. He wasn't handsome and he wasn't very nice, but he could be quite funny in his own way. Besides, he never did have any friends and as princess she was inclined to do nice things for the less fortunate.

It wasn't until she was older that she realized that no knight or prince was coming. It was then that she decided to save herself, after all men can be easily distracted. At least that's what her mother said. She found books and knowledge and promised herself that she'd never have to rely on a man ever again.

At age eleven her salvation came, but it wasn't in shining armor. No, it was it was enclosed in a piece of parchment with glittering green writing on it. She and Petunia waited a week for her sister's letter. A week was all it took for her sister's affections to turn away from her. At that moment she wondered if that piece of parchment was worth the loss of her dearest friend.

She didn't actually believe that magic existed until she stepped through that wall. Three steps were all it took to solidify the jagged rip between her and Petunia. Even at the age of eleven Lily knew that there was more than just a not so solid wall between them. Still she clamored on and stepped onto that train, heart breaking at every step that separated her from her sister.

After she found a compartment she saw a boy with glittering blond hair walk past her window and thought that he might be a prince.

However, from the sneer on his lips she was sure he wasn't hers.

As Hogwarts came clearly into view from around the bend, Lily knew that she's finally found her castle. All that was left was the prince. She could certainly pretend there was one until that time.

The first time she'd seen her prince her breath was taken away. He was smart and graceful. He was simply perfect. Her prince had steely silver eyes and long silky black hair.

The first conversation she'd had with him had involved him asking her to let him see up her skirt.

She'd punched him in the face that day and reopened the princely position. The next best option was his best friend, James something or another. He wasn't as handsome, but he seemed slightly better mannered.

Slightly.

One thing that was not so common knowledge in the Gryffindor house was that James Potter was very clearly already taken, whether he was aware of it or not didn't matter much. Fifteen year old Gryffindor boys are never aware of much anyhow.

Anyone who cared to look could see it. It was so obvious.

James Potter belonged to Sirius Black.

They just melded together.

They just belonged.

Too bad they were both too blind to see it. Ah, well. It was still best for her that they didn't. After all, fairy tales don't end with the princes together. Oh, no they ended with the princess and prince riding off into the sunset together. There always has to be a princess, always.

For her happy ending she knew she could pretend that Sirius Black didn't exist. Or at least he didn't hold as much sway over James as he actually did.

So, for now she'd play hard to get and hope that the boys didn't figure out that they were ridiculously in love with each other. If they did where would she be? She'd be left with Severus, probably. It wasn't that she didn't like him, but he just wasn't princely material.

He didn't have the nice and flowing hair.

However, to be completely honest, she couldn't compete with Sirius Black.

No mortal could.

And then she was planning a wedding. A complete turn around from a few years ago; when she had been on the receiving end of some of the worst Marauder pranks, with the exception of Severus, of course. Now she was receiving kiss and hugs and tokens of affection.

Things that she thought selfishly, Sirius would never get. The best man didn't get love like that from the groom. It simply wasn't the way stories ended, even when the best man finally figured out his feelings for the groom.

He was only a few days too late. She knew he'd never forgive her. That Sirius Black was smarter than he let on.

Not that it mattered anymore, but still he should be given more credit. He is a Black in some ways she supposed because the looks he'd been given her quite resemble his cousins' icy glares. No matter how hard he denies his heritage, the resemblance is remarkable when he's not careful to hide it.

As Lily prepares in the back room of the church, she go over the list in her head of all the tiny details. She makes sure every bead is placed and every piece of lace is set correctly. It might be meticulous, but it's her wedding and her dress is perfect for a princess.

The doors open and she prepares to glide down the aisle. Princesses don't walk like normal folk. She looks down the aisle to find James's spot empty. Rolling her eyes she sighs frustrated.

Late, as usual.

Then her mother is ushering her back into the small changing room. Lily soothes her mother so that she can better understand what she's saying. The poor woman is almost in tears.

"James left," her mother finally manages to sob out. "He left you here, dear."

"Left me," Lily softly mutters completely confused. "What do you mean?"

"Little Lily, he left you here for that horrid man," she says grabbing her daughters hands shakily. "He left you for that Sirius Black."

"Oh…" Lily managed softly.

So, James figured it out in time.

Well, good for them. She notices that she's not feeling as upset as she should. For appearance sake she must pretend that she is devastated.

Lily Evans can most certainly do that, she's been pretending her whole life.

A/N: Okay, so Lily ended up being the bad guy for a while. I truly didn't mean for her to be, but she just ended up slightly selfish about the whole situation. Shrug.

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