Author's Note: Written for celest on the livejournal community opexchange. It's a gen-fic with a dash of Franky/Robin. I hope you enjoy!
They say that every good fighter has a sixth sense that allows them to feel anything they deem dangerous approaching. An uncanny ability, almost superhuman, that alerts them to peril drawing near. As for Roronoa Zoro, he was no exception to this rule. The crew had seen him many times countering an attack from an enemy that had snuck up behind him as easily as he'd swat a fly. Usopp recounted the tale of an incident in which, late at night, Zoro had sliced a stray cannonball while still sound asleep. Usually, the crew would put off Usopp's tales as nothing but fable; but in this situation, they all wondered if this story was true.
This sixth sense, this superhuman intuition, was the very reason Zoro was nowhere on the Sunny-Go to be found.
It was a danger so threatening, so intimidating, that Zoro had literally run away in lieu of facing it. Needless to say, his crewmates were not at all pleased.
"It figures he'd run like a coward the second he realized what we were up to," Nami noted, facing the crew. "And knowing him," she continued, "he probably is lost somewhere on the ship."
The group nodded their heads in agreement; all of them knowing that Zoro could get lost in the bathroom if he so put his mind to it.
"Well then, why don't we lure him out?" Franky suggested.
"Perhaps, if we use loud noises we can drive him to a specific location; a technique that people of West Blue often use to direct stray whales. Once he's out in the open, we can surround him before he can run again," Robin spoke up.
"If I might add to that suggestion?"
The crew turned to where Brook sat sipping his tea.
"If the methods we're employing are on the scale of whales, perhaps this plan calls for a little music."
He motioned to the crew and they all gathered around, exchanging whispers and strategies back and forth until they came to their final plan. Nami took charge of divvying up orders and instructions to everyone.
"Luffy, Usopp- you're the distraction. Sanji- you can finalize preparations in the kitchen."
"Yes, Nami-swaaaaaan!" The cook replied, hearts in his eyes.
She frowned, "And don't write 'Stupid Marimo' on the cake!"
Sanji sighed, snapping back to normal, "Fine, I'll fix the icing."
"Good," Nami continued, "Chopper- you and I will block off the rooms we've already checked. Franky, Robin- you can set up the wiring and Brook-"
"I'll keep my eyelids peeled in case I see him, even though I don't have any eyelids. Yohoho!"
Nami shook her head at the musician's skull-joke and steeled her expression, "All right- Operation Birthday shall now commence!"
The crew scattered systematically- Sanji headed for the kitchen, Franky and Robin below deck to gather supplies, Nami and Chopper headed to the front of the ship and Luffy and Usopp scrambled up to the crow's nest to access the loud speaker there. Brook stood in the center of the upper deck, waiting for the swordsman to be flushed out of hiding.
Zoro wasn't sure where he was on the Sunny-Go. He'd heard murmurs that morning about birthday-this and cake-that and followed his gut instinct to hide and avoid the embarrassment.
Thinking back to the most recent Strawhat birthdays- the stupid singing, the idiotic "birthday crown" that Usopp had made, the fact that more often than not Usopp, Luffy or Brook ended up smashed into the cake either by accident or because Luffy couldn't hold off eating any longer- did not bode well with Zoro. He would settle for a few barrels of something alcoholic and a tag attached wishing him well rather than the fiasco birthdays with the Strawhats tended to become.
"Zoro, where are you?!" Usopp's voice echoed from the crow's nest overhead, "Luffy is eating the ship and we cannot stop him without your help!"
The sound of faked chomping noises joined Usopp's voice. "Help Zoro! He's eating everything! We need you to come to the deck and save us!"
Zoro rolled his eyes. If they honestly believed that such a ridiculous story would lure him out...
"Oh my gosh! There's a small ship approaching with someone on it. Can it be him? Yes it can! It's the legendary swordsman from the isle of Wakachukey! He's so amazing he uses swords with his hands and feet! And he's coming onto our deck right now!"
Luffy made an odd gurgling noise over the loud speaker, followed by the clang of a sword. Usopp gasped, "I sure wish Zoro could see this swordsman fight. He's the best! But I guess Brook will have to duel him instead..."
And although he was quite lost and didn't know which way the deck even was- Zoro stood up from his hiding spot and started heading in the direction of Usopp's voice hoping it would lead him to the other swordsman.
Unbeknownst to him, Phase One of Operation Birthday had been achieved.
Nami and Chopper had searched all the sleeping quarters, marking off the checked rooms with medical tape across the doors, and were heading down to the dock system below when they overheard Franky talking, followed by Robin's laughter.
"And so then, I told Bakaberg that I'd have Kokoro-baachan pop out of the cake if he didn't come in and celebrate his birthday with us."
Curiosity getting the best of them, they crept towards the doorway to Franky's room and peered through the crack in the door.
Franky was seated on the floor, tinkering with a small box and a collection of wires as he told his lively tale. Robin sat beside him, passing him scraps of wood and metal and tools as he needed them. Nami was about to knock and ask how things were going when she noticed Robin leaning over rather intimately to whisper in Franky's ear.
"It seems we have an audience," Robin murmured. Franky opened his mouth to reply, but Robin silenced him with a gentle finger to his lips. Leaning even closer, and brushing her lips against his cheek, she whispered, "I was thinking that we should give them a show."
Nami sorely wished she could hear what was going on, especially whatever it was Robin had said to cause Franky to blush like that. A little voice in her head was chanting "curiosity killed the cat burglar" over and over, but she blatantly ignored it. Glancing down at Chopper, she mouthed the words, "Can you hear them?"
The reindeer nodded his head in the negative, but he seemed equally intrigued as to what was going on between their shipwright and their archaeologist. Sticking their heads a bit further through the door, Nami and Chopper took it upon themselves to shamelessly eavesdrop.
Franky and Robin had gone back to tinkering with the boxes, which bore more of a resemblance to a speaker now that they were nearing completion. Acting as if their intimate whispers had never happened, the two started talking loud enough that their intruders could overhear perfectly.
"So, do you think we could convince Nami to pop out of Zoro's cake?" Robin casually remarked. Franky laughed.
"We could threaten to have me in the cake if he doesn't stop hiding."
Robin raised an eyebrow, "I wouldn't mind that."
Nami and Chopper glanced at each other in excitement, feeling the tension building and eagerly awaiting to see it break.
Franky turned to Robin with a grin, "You would say that after manhandling me."
"Something that I am beginning to think you enjoyed more than you'd like to let on."
"Oi, that's not even funny."
Robin shrugged and leaned over to whisper again. "Want to bet she tries to cover Chopper's eyes?" Casting a quick glance towards the door, she spoke a little louder, "Well if you wear so little clothing, you're asking for it."
"Oh really?" Putting his arm around Robin, Franky whispered back, "20 beli that she doesn't because she's in shock."
Leaning up closer, she smirked, "You're on."
Having forgotten completely about their quest to find Zoro, Nami and Chopper both gaped as the scene unfolded before them. Robin, after casting a subtle glance towards the door and smirking at the gawking duo, had reached up and captured Franky's lips with her own.
Franky laughed into the kiss, able to spy Nami and Chopper's bug-eyed expression out of his peripheral vision before he closed his eyes. Inwardly, he wondered why it had never occurred to them before to shock their crewmates with their relationship.
A few seconds passed and the door swung open as the two stumbled into the room. Franky and Robin pulled apart, trying their hardest not to laugh at the expressions donning their nakama's faces.
"Oi! Haven't you ever heard of knocking?" The shipwright asked, trying his hardest to sound miffed.
"I'm sorry. We were just coming to check on things and...and..." Nami stammered, turning to Chopper for support.
The reindeer quickly covered his own eyes, "We didn't see anything. Nothing at all!"
"Chopper, that's not helping!" Nami snapped at him.
"It's all right, Nami. There's nothing to hide," Robin spoke up, her face a picture of innocence, "We are just concerned about future incidents in which a lack of a knock might cause you to walk in on... well, let's say it's more than a kiss."
Nami's head whirled in Franky's direction, then whipped back towards Robin. Franky caught the glint of mischief in Robin's eyes and had to feel a bit sorry for their navigator who was glancing between them in complete, unbelieving, shock. Surprisingly, Chopper seemed to be taking it better than Nami; the doctor simply mouthing a surprised, "...Oh."
"Oh Nico Robin, you sly woman. This is why I love you," Franky thought to himself before masking his face with a serious expression and turning to the others.
"Oi! Can we stop discussing our love life and get back to finding Zoro?"
Shaking her head to erase the mental pictures that had surfaced, Nami looked down at Franky, "What?"
"Just finished up the wiring on the last box. I'm particularly super this week, so it's already good to go. Oi, Reindeer-bro?"
"Uh…yeah?" Chopper nervously replied.
"Can you help me rig this up throughout the ship?"
"S-sure."
Franky fought back another urge to burst into laughter at Nami and Chopper's awkward reactions, but still couldn't help himself from making it worse. Gathering up an armful of speakers and their wires, he pecked a quick kiss on Robin's cheek.
"Nico-babe, see if you can help Nami find Zoro."
Robin raised an eyebrow at the nickname, but quickly caught on as she replied with her own, "Okay, handsome. Don't want him slicing up your beautiful ship just because he's lost who-knows-where?"
He grimaced at the thought, "Exactly." Turning to the doctor, Franky grinned, "Come on, Chopper- it's SUPER sound system time!"
The two headed up to the deck, a trail of wires dragging behind them. Nami managed a tenative smile before turning back to Robin.
"So...uh, you and Franky..."
Robin shrugged, "What can I say? Cola-powered men are my biggest turn on."
Her stoic expression cracked into a smirk as the girls both started laughing. Robin smiled at her friend, already wondering how much money Nami would swindle out of the rest of the crew by simply betting them "I bet you Franky and Robin are a couple" and letting them lose; but at the moment there were more important matters than Nami's sure-fire bet. Composing themselves, they put their minds back to the task at hand.
"All right. I'm going to see if we can find out where Zoro has gotten to. Ojos Fleur!"
Using her devil fruit power, she sprouted eyes into all the various rooms, finally spotting the moving figure of their green-haired swordsman.
"Ah, there he is. We must have just missed him going past. He's going up the stairs into the Energy Room. He should be passing through the Aquarium bar soon."
"Good, that probably means Usopp's 'swordsman on deck' story is working," Nami remarked, "Will Franky and Chopper finish on time?"
Robin grabbed Nami's hand, pulling her towards the ladder up to the deck. "Let's go find out."
Zoro had heard the sword clangs stop over the loud speaker, Usopp's voice now rambling about how Brook had tragically fallen and how doomed they all were without Zoro there to save them.
Walking out from the Energy Room and around the Aquarium, Zoro pushed open the door to the lawn deck. Before he could even glance around, Luffy ran over to him, grinning like mad.
"Zoro, Zoro, Zoro! You gotta come over here! It's so cool!"
The captain led him out to the center of the deck as Robin and Nami emerged from below deck and rushed towards them.
"Where's Chopper?" Nami asked the group. Zoro figured that all the crew had been running about in panic with a rogue swordsman on deck.
"He's with Sanji," Usopp called out as he climbed down the ladder from the crow's nest and joined the others. "Oh, and Franky's with Brook," he randomly noted, discreetly winking to the group.
And with that, they all knew that Phase Two and Three of their operation were about to begin.
Zoro had just opened his mouth to ask where the intruder was when Franky's voice blared over the surround-sound speaker system on the main deck, "Attention SUPER ladies and gentlemen! Swordsmen and archaeologists, sharpshooters and navigators too; musicians, doctors, cooks and of course- our wonderful captain- we gather here today to celebrate the birthday of our SUPER first mate and swordsman- Roronoa Zoro! Hit it, guys!"
A cacophony of noise and movement berated Zoro's senses as all his birthday nightmares collided.
Franky and Brook sang and played 'Happy Birthday' over the speakers, Sanji and Chopper emerged from the kitchen with a huge, multilayer cake, and Usopp and Luffy crammed the birthday crown on Zoro's head. Zoro was about to draw his swords and make a hasty retreat when Robin and Nami scooted a barrel of sake of over to him and smiled. At that, he caved.
"Happy Birthday, Zoro!" The entire crew chorused as Franky and Brook joined the others on deck.
And looking around to the smiling faces of his friends, Zoro decided that perhaps Strawhat birthday parties weren't so bad after all.
THE END