Set in present day Manchester in the BBC and ITV Media City Studios, Salford
Gene Hunt loves his executive Ford saloons, but what is his driving bug bears? A one shot from the resident Detective Chief Inspector of Life on Mars POV on ITV's hit day time magazine show This Morning long running since 1988 in the town he grew up in during the Seventies.
Philip Schofield asked the former Greater Manchester Police DCI "What are your bugbears when driving?"
"Where do I start? There are too many to mention. People driving up you're a**e, (or) cutting you up. But I probably do most of those things myself so I have to be careful!" he laughed at Holly Willoughby who wore the most gorgeously hottest and attractive fashions with her make up.
Holly Willoughby was straight laced curious about what kind of car DCI Gene Hunt has, if he ever had sporty ones with the seats low down on the ground "What kind of car do you have, a sporty number?" he humoured her gently dissuading the thoughts of super go fast Audis.
"I don't have Audi cars as they're s**t heaps. And they're low down so I'm too old now. It's nice in your twenties and thirties but I like something where you have to get into it like my Fords, Jaguars and Mercedes saloons." as the woman presenter conveniently forgot Gene's age of 10th February 1963 accidentally straying from the pink script papers on the reflecting glass coffee table.
"Do you think you're a good driver?" asked Philip Schofield in his Australian English accent with his famous spikey hair.
"I think I'm alright. Touch wood, there haven't been any accidents. I think I'm quite a cautious driver although my missus will probably tell you differently. But living in London you can't bloody move, it's a permanent traffic jam. And at work I like to speed my Ford Mondys around the place!"
"What do you listen to in the car?" Holly Willoughby quoted joking around with the Northern England copper of thirty six years experience.
"I mainly listen to the radio. BBC Radio 1, Radio 2 and Radio 4, that's my age. Rock music if I'm in the mood. Joe Satriani, David Bowie, thrash guitar, which isn't really my thing but great to drive along to. If I've got my girlfriend Alexia's kids with me, then it's what they want to listen to. I'm like, 'Put your headphones on, Uncle Gene's listening to Woman's Hour!'"
"How come you've been presenting For The Love Of Cars?" Philip Schofield cheekily asked whether Gene liked leading his double life as a co presenter with Ant Andstead on Channel 4 as a police officer turned television presenter.
"I was asked and it sounded like a challenge. I suppose when I was growing up, one of the things that seemed to stand out or at least appealed to me was those detective shows in the Seventies where the cars were cast as leading role, almost - you know, The Dukes of Hazzard and Starsky & Hutch. And then when Life On Mars and Ashes To Ashes happened, we had the Cortina and the Audi Quattro and they became players in the show. People responded to them, so I think that's how the car thing came about." as Gene wistfully thought back to his fun far away misspent childhood.
"Are you much of a car buff?" said Holly Willoughby who was getting all flirty over Detective Chief Inspector Gene Hunt.
"I suppose I am, as long as it's not a supercar that makes you look like a prat or a nonce." he gruffly quoted "I like cars with subtle lines in them, that quietly speak to the world like the Mondeos I own." he smiled "I started with a second hand Ford Cortina MkIII 2000 E in 1980 in gold aged seventeen as a kid and it all snowballed from there,"
"Would you like to own a classic car?" Philip Schofield was about to offend DCI Gene Hunt dangerously setting off his rating levels to midnight.
"No, Alexei Sayle put me off, he's a French bending bleeding fairy." he snarled "He used to own classic cars and said there's nothing more terrifying than driving around London in a poofter classic car not knowing whether it's going to break down. We were going to go to France for the day and the Triumph Stag 'e borrowed broke down before we got to Aldgate East, so that put me off!" the male presenter nearly bore the brunt of Gene's legendary temper tantrums; "Plus it needs to be in a garage and I haven't got the room, and it needs tender loving care and you need a lot of money!" Gene replied rudely to Philip Schofield's not thoughtfully checked question "Absolute gold pit wasters, unless you count the fabulously classy bronze MkIII Cortina GXL, I still have second hand from 2007 when Life on Mars ended filming." eventually cheering up as he walked to his beloved 1995 Ford Granada Mk3 with DCI Sam Tyler waiting.
"That was a strong start to this Thursday edition of This Morning, Me & My Motors interview with the brash Detective Chief Inspector of Metropolitan Police's CID; Gene Hunt!" Holly Willoughby excitedly shouted through the Media City studios ceilings.
The studio audience gave out strong whoops, whistles and rounds of applause.
Well what do you think fellow fan fiction authors? Worth a gold Ford Cortina review star at least? Let me know.