Goodbye To You
Disclaimer: I don't own DBZ. Nor the song. All rights belong to their rightful owners. Thank you.
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She sat in her room, just like any other day, staring out her window. She was sitting at the desk, waiting, still hoping somehow he'd find his way back to her. She couldn't believe that after everything, she'd kept her mouth shut. She chose not to say anything to him, even when she had the chance. Even when he, himself, told her just how he felt. How could she have let that moment slip away? How could she have let him get away? How could she have let him go…?
She never expected him to take on the challenge. Sure fighting was something he did, but it'd been years. He'd only ever really fought with Majin Buu using his full potential, other than that… She couldn't understand what possessed him to decide he had to fight alongside his father and brother. He had no reason to be in that group at all. He was still young. He wasn't like his brother. He was like no one else… He was truly one of a kind… She missed him so much.
Of all the things I've believed in
I just want to get it over with…
She stood in the mirror, dressed in black. The color fit her brooding mood. It seemed to fit her life now for it was black. Losing him… Well she lost the color in her world as well. She had no desire to go, but she loved him. To not go to the funeral of the man you loved… She found it disrespectful. After all, he did sacrifice his life for the entire earth. As much as it saddened her, it also made her very angry. How could he decide to stay there? How could he?
Tears form behind my eyes
but I do not cry…
Counting the days that pass me by…
"Marron," her father asked as he stood in the door. He looked at her, feeling her pain. He knew exactly it was like to lose someone you loved.
She didn't reply, walking past him and down the stairs. Sighing, he stood out in the hall. He caught the eye of his wife. They shared a sad look between them before following after their daughter.
…"Come on, Goten! Teach me how!" she'd begged him. Sure, she could have asked her father for flying lessons, but she wanted to learn from Goten. She admired him; it was only right she be one of his pupils. Of course he'd taken her on, not charging her for the lessons for he felt that being with her was simply enough.
"I know you can do it Marron, just focus," his warm soft voice spoke in her ear. They were sitting in the forest. He stood behind her, ready to catch her if she fell. "Just close your eyes…"
She obeyed. She began to feel herself lifting off the ground slowly. It didn't seem much with her eyes closed, but once she opened them, she could see that she was much higher than the last time she looked down. Goten floated next to her with a huge proud grin on his face.
"Great job!" he patted her on the back, causing her to lose her balance. Panicking, Marron lost her concentration and began to fall from the air. A small scream escaped from her lips just before he caught her. She looked up into those dark eyes, relief watching over her and that was when things had begun to change…
I've been searching deep down in my soul
Words I'm hearing are starting to get old
Marron couldn't listen. Her ears didn't want to listen to what Dende had to say. She didn't want to hear him tell the Son family that they should've been proud of their son. She didn't want to hear him tell her and everyone else that he wanted them to be happy. How could she be happy? She'd lost the man she loved. There was nothing to be happy about! She turned away, unable to stare at the picture of him that was being displayed, very long. In it he was wearing a suit, his smile so wide it was blinding. She could almost hear his laugh.
It feels like I'm starting all over again
The last three years were just pretend…
"He will be greatly missed by us all."
…She'd been crying that night. Her parents were out with Goku and Chichi, enjoying a little double date. Master Roshi had decided to get out of the house as well, leaving her alone. She ended up crying, for it hurt so much. She couldn't keep brushing it off. She didn't expect him to come knocking at her door. He sat with her, he listened… It was hard not to tell him everything.
"What?! I can't believe that jackass!" he'd exclaimed out in anger.
She'd just been dumped. It'd been months since their flying lessons ended. She decided she couldn't go through with saying him how she really felt so she found someone else. For a while it was working, until she couldn't keep up the façade anymore. But unfortunately, her boyfriend ended up breaking her heart anyway by cheating on her and then bragging to everyone about it. It crushed her. he could see how bad she was hurting. No one deserved that, especially her. So he held her in his arms, not caring for how long. He just wanted to hold her. She'd been eighteen, he was twenty-two.
"If I ever meet this guy, you can be sure he'll be beaten to a complete pulp!" Goten said through gritted teeth.
Marron had felt so safe in his arms, his words comforting her. She really loved him, there was no denying it now, but she'd never tell him anyway. She fell asleep in his arms…
"I can't believe he's really gone," she heard Chichi sob to Goku as he held the feeble woman in his arms. It didn't look it, but Goku too had tears in his eyes. She looked over at Gohan. He had his head hung low, his hand tightly squeezing Videl's. He was trying not to cry.
"He would have been twenty-five…" Bulma was saying.
"I miss my uncle…" Pan muttered sitting with her parents.
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to…
"Marron…" Krillin called after his daughter, but she walked out the door.
…"I love you, Marron and I know it's so stupid that I'm only saying it now, but I guess it's true. You only can say the things you really want to say when you know there's a chance your life… Could be over."
They were out on the shore at her house. Her parents were inside, along with Master Roshi. She didn't have to look behind her to know they were watching them closely, smiles on their faces. Marron had turned to him, her eyes wide. He felt exactly the same way as she did so why couldn't she say anything? He took her hand in his. She could feel the roughness of his hands, the muscles that relaxed as she gave them a small squeeze.
"If I come back, I want us to be together… But I need to know, do you… Do you love me too?" his eyes were wide and hopeful. It hurt to know they shattered that glitter of hope.
"No," was the only word she could get out…
She felt stupid. How could she have chosen to say no? How could she let herself be dumb enough to make that decision just because she was afraid of how things would work out? Just because she was angry with him for deciding he wanted to fight… To put his life in danger… She hated herself for it.
I still get lost in your eyes
and it seems I can't live a day without you…
Ever since she let him fly off that island, not saying what she truly felt, she'd hated herself. She'd tried so hard to make sense of it all, to make excuses to herself so that she wouldn't feel horrible but she couldn't. She wanted to say yes. She wanted to fly to him and tell him the truth, the whole truth. But it was too late. if she hadn't been so afraid…
Closing my eyes and you chase my thoughts away
To a place where I am blinded by the light, but it's not right
…"He… He didn't make it," Gohan had struggled to spit out the day after their return.
She'd been hoping to see him. She didn't know the result of the fight until that day she saw her father and Gohan, along with Goku, come home. Her mother had been so glad to see her father that she cried and it was rare to see her mother cry. At first they didn't understand why Gohan had come along, but when he pulled her aside…
"He wanted me to tell you… That… That he really cared about you and-and that h-he hopes…" Gohan couldn't speak. He'd tried but nothing else came out. She didn't want to hear more anyway.
"He doesn't want to be wished back?!" Krillin shouted after Gohan told them the news, six months after. "Why the hell not?!"
"He says… He'd like to live in other world for a bit. He says it's a new adventure…" Videl explained for Gohan couldn't bear to say anything more.
Marron had gotten up and walked up to her room. She screamed, she cried, she tore her room apart. How could he decide that? She wished so bad that he could be wished back so that she could tell him everything, but now he chose to stay away and live there? What for? she found herself asking. What could he want to do there? Then she broke down, realizing maybe it was because of her that he chose to keep himself there. She felt even worse. She just wanted to die…
"I… I miss you," she whispered into the wind. She sat on a tree branch. She couldn't stay at the lookout while they mourned Goten's death. She couldn't sit there and listen to them swap stories in his remembrance. She didn't want to hear stories of happy times; times of when she could have been with him but had chosen not to. She felt like such a fool. "I miss you so much…" tears fell from her face.
Goodbye to you
Goodbye to everything I thought I knew
You were the one I loved
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
She thought back to the times that she ran to him when she felt down and how after just mere seconds of seeing him, she felt so much better. Even now, even though he was gone, when she thought of his smile, her heart would skip a beat. She found herself breathless. She missed the way he made her feel. He made her feel wanted, loved… Special.
…"You're a special girl Marron," he said with a grin when he took her out for ice cream once. He'd been ten, she'd been six. Though he said it in a way that sound so brotherly, now she knew what he might have meant…
"Please… Please," she sobbed. "Goten please come back."
And it hurts to want everything and nothing at the same time
I want what's yours and I want what's mine
I want you, but I'm not giving in this time…
Time passed on, ever so slowly, Marron felt. And though almost two years had past since his passing, she still felt as though it were only yesterday that she heard the news and only yesterday that she'd gone to his memorial service. She hated it. She hated how life hadn't been the same ever since. Trunks had taken on the roll as her protector, but it wasn't the same. He wasn't Goten. He couldn't make her feel the way he did. She didn't like him in that way, she couldn't. She was still madly in love with the man who taught her how to fly; the man who stupidly jumped in front of a ki-blast to protect his friends and family. She'd never, ever stop loving him.
…The one thing that I tried to hold on to…
She spent most of her nights on the roof, staring up at the star lit sky. Marron wasn't much of a stargazer, but she'd gotten used to it after remembering a night that she almost had what she wanted.
…They lay together side by side, staring up at the sky. Goten felt so close to her. He could smell the powder her mother had dabbed onto her face. It smelled sweetly of Vanilla. He'd never been so close to her before. He turned to her, watching her, causing her to turn to him with a nervous smile. He lightly touched her cheek. She could feel him leaning in… Closer and closer… But then she was called inside and the moment was ruined…
"I wonder… If you're happy," she whispered. "I still miss you so much…"
She hadn't given up hope that he'd come back.
The one thing that I tried to hold on to
And when the stars fall, I will lie awake
"Please Goten… Please come back… There are so many things I want to say to you…" she continued to murmur. She laid there, her eyes welling up with tears once again. "Please come back… Give me a sign that you'll come back…"
And though it had been quick, and it might have been just her imagination she thought she saw a flash of light in the sky. It was quick but it made her feel…Warm. She closed her eyes with a smile.
You're my shooting star…
"I'll be waiting…" and she drifted off to sleep.
Author's Note: Well, another Goten Marron ONESHOT songfic. To be honest, I was working when I heard this song. I was cleaning tables and when I heard it these two immediately popped into my head. My apologies for the vagueness of the whole battle issue. I just didn't want to get into it. Lol let's just say there was this huge battle that he didn't make it out of. Sound good? Good. Now please don't disappoint me. Leave a review! I'd really appreciate it.
MarauderWormtail89