A/N1: Set in the 2k3 series, immediately following the 3-part story arc Return to New York, and at the beginning of Lone Raph and Cub. To those not familiar with the episodes, Splinter disappears during the battle with Shredder in the final episode of the 3-parter, and at the beginning of Lone Raph and Cub, Raph's venting causes Leo to send him out to blow off some steam. This story is an attempt to show what exchange may have happened following his doing so.
Thanks go out to two-roads-and-a-penny for beta reading this for me.
Disclaimer: Do not own and never have. Just playing in the sandbox for a while.
"You sure that was a good idea?"
Leonardo turned to look up at Donatello, who'd paused in his repairs of the Battleshell's engine to watch their brother Raphael storming out of the lair. "You mean letting Raph go out on his own?"
Donatello nodded, then replied with a tone of concern. "Yes, that. You've seen how he's been acting since Master Splinter's disappearance. Besides beating up obsessively on that training dummy, he's been snapping at us every chance he gets. He's a walking time bomb waiting to go off, Leo."
The team leader sighed. "He's just worried about Master Splinter, Donnie. We all are."
Donatello snorted. "We all are, yes, but unlike him, we're at least trying to be rational when it comes to searching for him. Even Mikey is being rational, and that's saying something."
"Hey!" the aforementioned "Mikey" yelped.
Ignoring the interruption, the purple-masked turtle continued. "He's just going to get himself or someone else hurt in the frame of mind he's in, and if it's him, I'm going to have to deal with that when he gets back. You know that."
"Donnie's gotta point, Leo. Raph's been more of a hothead than usual lately, because of what happened to Master Splinter. Why'd you let him go out there anyway?" their youngest brother, Michelangelo, asked.
The blue masked turtle was quiet for a few minutes as he considered his answer.
Why had he done it, exactly?
In truth, he wasn't quite sure himself.
His brothers were right in that it was a bad idea to let Raph go out on his own. Shell, ever since the hothead got himself stuck in the van the first time they'd gone up to the surface, Leo had lost count of all the times his brother's temper had gotten him into a situation that they all had needed to pull him out of. And his impulsiveness had triggered about as many lectures over the years, not just from him, but from Master Splinter as well.
So that alone was very good enough reason to have restricted Raph to the lair. He was angry, not thinking straight, and they still had enemies out there who were hunting for them. He was more liable to end up in trouble than finding Master Splinter.
But Leo also knew where a lot of his brother's anger stemmed from. After all, it hadn't been too long ago where he'd been beaten into unconsciousness and thrown through their friend April's window, and all of them had had a narrow escape when the Shredder had started a fire in April's shop, following what he'd been told had been more dangerous than any other they'd experienced. If it hadn't been for her remembering about that hole in the wall of the cooler, none of them would be here right now.
They'd almost died that night, and it had taken him weeks to recover fully. It had been a rough time for them all.
Upon their return to the city a few months following the Foot's attack on him, they'd decided to face down the Foot Clan again in an attempt to finish them once and for all.
It hadn't gone well.
Shredder had thrown everything he had and then some at them: Foot Mystics, clones, a sword he'd called the Tengu...
They'd been tested to their limits and then some.
It hadn't helped that Stockman had shown up, either, which had made things worse, for Leo and his family were exhausted by that point with a battle that didn't seem like it was ever going to end.
When Splinter had been injured by Shredder, and then thrown out that window...
Leo had been terrified in that moment, he would admit that. Splinter had not only been their sensei, in many ways he had been the only parent figure they'd ever known in their lives...
The idea of losing him was not something they'd ever wanted to consider.
The discovery that Splinter had gone missing during the battle (which they'd eventually won) only made that possibility seem even more real.
And that, Leo knew, was certainly what was driving Raphael's anger deep down.
The hothead would never admit it openly to them, but he cared deeply about his family, and Splinter had always been there for them for as far back as they could remember. To lose their father figure and mentor in the way they had made Raph feel helpless, had injured his pride that he hadn't been able to do anything to prevent it...And it would have angered him to the point that he would want to do whatever it took to get their father back to them.
So to Raphael, waiting would be unacceptable, and he would consider sitting around doing nothing to be a betrayal of their sensei.
While Leonardo would personally prefer to wait until they had some lead, no matter how helpless he felt about the whole matter, that wasn't Raph's way of handling things, and as much as he hated the idea of letting his brother go off seemingly half-cocked, even he could understand the need to want to do something, anything, even if it proved fruitless in the end.
They might handle things differently, but at their core, they both cared for their family and did what they had to do in their own ways.
And that was something Leo could well understand.
Finally having his answer, he turned to his brothers and April, who by now had moved from the table where she was poring over the map to stand by Mikey.
"I let him go because he needs this," Leonardo said calmly.
"He 'needs this'?" Donatello replied. Mikey also had a bemused expression on his face.
Leonardo nodded. "You know what Raph is like, Donnie," he began. "He might not show it in a way we'd all prefer, but he cares about his family, and if anything happened to any of us, he'd be out there hunting for whoever did it. He hates being unable to do anything, and if we kept him confined here, it would just have made that feeling worse, and he would have blown up on us eventually."
"Which would have made the whole situation worse...," Donnie's voice trailed off carefully, as he began to understand where his team leader was going with this.
"Yes," his brother confirmed. "And we all need to be working with clear heads. Letting him go vent his frustration will help with that."
"Still risky, dude," Michelangelo pointed out. "What if it doesn't work out like that and Raph comes back angrier?"
"Then I'll deal with that myself," Leo said firmly.
His tone brooked no argument, and his two youngest brothers seemed to get that from the look they shared.
April merely nodded, and went back to work to monitor the police bands. Mikey shrugged and drifted off into the kitchen to get himself something to eat.
Donnie, however, didn't return immediately back to his task. "Something wrong, Donnie?" Leo asked.
Donatello just frowned a moment and then shook his head. "You're putting a lot of faith in Raph's cooling down, Leo, and Mikey does have a point. He's gone out before and come back still as angry as when he left. Don't get me wrong, I'm hoping you're right about the outcome, but this is a new situation for us. We almost lost you a few months ago, and with Master Splinter's disappearance, it's got us all facing things we've never really had to before, specifically the idea that we might not make it out one day. Shredder keeps escalating the battle against us every time we meet. And while Raph may think with his fists more often than not, I'm pretty sure that what I've just said has probably occurred to him, too."
Leo nodded in understanding. Still..."I said I'll deal with that if this proves to be the case, Donnie. Believe me, I know where you're coming from, too. I've thought about all that more than once since I got hurt, but we both know that Raph can be more reasonable when he's given the chance to settle down and think about things on his own without us pushing him."
Donnie's frown became thoughtful as he mulled over his brother's words for a few minutes. Then he too nodded and, without another word, went back to repairing the Battleshell.
Leonardo, however, stood there in the center of the room, staring out in the direction where Raphael had gone.
After a few minutes, he bowed his head and sighed softly, then turned and headed back to join April at the table to once more try to see if they could pin anything down. As he walked back, he couldn't help but send one last thought in his brother's direction.
Take care of yourself out there, hothead.
A/N2: Doing a missing scene for an episode I remembered from the 2k3 series was actually my first idea for a story to break back into the fandom. Lone Raph and Cub was a favorite of mine, and seemed to be little paid attention to, so I thought I'd look for a point where I could show something of what was happening behind the scenes.
Technical issues (namely dying laptop battery and difficulty watching vids on my laptop) and the idea for Not What He Really Wanted poking in caused this to be slowed down in development. But finally, after several false starts, I finished this piece.
Not sure if I'll be continuing immediately in this fandom, but this and the 1990s movie story have given me the confidence I need to try again should other ideas strike.
