My name is Pan Fluch. I was born in a clinic in Stalliongrad. I have black eyes and a heavy shaggy brownish black mane. My favorite colour is blue and my favourite food is hay fries. I want to be on the cover of a magazine one day, with my hair brushed and a collar and tie on. I'll have white teeth and blue eyes peeking from my perfect hair. I'll have one hoof by my head pretending that I'm adjusting my hair and my other hoofs on the floor.
Where I am now there isn't much blue and they don't serve hay fries too often. My hair doesn't get brushed too often either. I used to live in a little house in the forest that used to be a cabin, but I renovated it to be an actual house. I'm very good with my hoofs, its a trait I'm rather proud of. Another trait I like about myself is that I can play a lot of instruments. Mostly wind instruments, those are the kind you blow into or across. I know you blow across flutes and pan flutes but thats about it. You might know of other wind instruments. I was named after the Pan flute actually. My last name is Fluch and I guess thats supposed to sound like flute so, Pan Flute.
But that's not my name. I've never played the pan flute and I don't live in a little house in the forest that used to be a cabin. Now I live in a mental hospital in a room with a lumpy bed, a desk and a window. What happens here isn't too interesting. So instead I'll just tell you about how I got here. First I would like to thank you for taking the time out of your busy day to hear me speak. Most pony's detest me for doing things I can't help and personally don't like either. I can understand why nopony likes me; I don't much like me either. Now without further ado I'll tell you my story.