Names are never mentioned, but written as if I were writing about Axel. Axel will be the main character throughout the Redemption and Salvation series. Alternate universe.
Rain.
Does it cleanse the soul?
Or will I be stained forever?
Am I still innocent if I have sinned?
Am I still an angel if have watched the world turn to dust?
If everything dies then why was anything ever born?
If I am unwanted then why was I ever created?
This music pounds in my head.
The DJ won't stop turning it up.
I wish it would wipe my mind clean.
She comes up to me.
She wants to dance.
But my hair is the color that stains my hands and clothes.
Blood.
She hurries away.
I can't feel the alcohol slide past my tongue.
I'm going through withdrawals.
I haven't had anything today.
Withdrawals are worse than using.
I'm using them to punish myself.
The cops come.
They slam me against a table.
Cold metal slides around my wrists.
It hurts.
The jail cell is cold.
Water drips.
Water.
Rain.
My soul is still stained.
I killed him.
Why?
No reason.
I deserve to die.
He had a family.
I see his wife cry.
The girl needs a bone marrow transfusion.
I'd rip it out of my body.
I'd give it to her right now.
Would I atone for my sins then?
The withdrawals are killing me.
They're punishing me.
Maybe I should die.
Please let them kill me.
A priest.
Am I supposed to confess?
Everyone knows what I did.
A last meal.
I refuse to eat.
Why bother?
These withdrawals.
A different room.
Clean and sterile.
A new chair.
Straps.
Needles.
Thank you.
The wife is there.
She's crying.
The child's not.
I ask.
She died.
Bone marrow couldn't be found.
They had tested mine.
It would have worked.
The mother didn't want her daughter kept alive by the man who killed her husband.
I don't blame her.
But now she's lost everything.
Like me.
I start to feel tired.
Was this really it?
Screwed that up didn't I?
It's raining.
I'm still filthy.
My body drifts away.
My soul is free.
I'm still stained.
At last I can be like the rain.
And wash everything away.
If only at the moment of death.
Redemption.
Salvation.
All reserved for people who tried.
It hurts.
Intense pain.
My veins are on fire.
Withdrawals.
And then there is nothing.
But the rain.
Pounding on the pavement.
Washing everything away.
Thank you.
Goodbye.
And…
I'm sorry.
Number one in Redemption and Salvation series. Reviews appreciated.