Prologue: May 10, 2006
Ai Haibara glared at her computer in frustration. Why wouldn't it compute? She had everything. Or she should. But no matter what she tried the antidote simulator failed time and time again resulting in the words "Subject Death" popping up in the top right corner of her screen.
"Go fuck yourself" she hissed under her breath as another failed simulation popped up. "Language" a voice murmured behind her. "Kudo-kun don't make me shoot you." She snarled back at him refusing to take her eyes off of the screen before her.
"We are 10 technically." He said softly sidling up next to her and read another "subject death" over her shoulder. "How about we don't try this version out on me?" "If you don't shut up I will force feed it down your throat." He smiled slightly. She still adamantly refused to turn around. That smile of his always managed to either make her feel better or make her explode, and there was no saying which would occur in this situation.
She desperately wanted him to leave. Not because he was annoying her. She just needed her full concentration on the task at hand. After another 10 failed simulations, Ai was at breaking point. She had run 487 sims so far today and was getting nowhere. She glanced back up at the clock and discovered it was 3:30 A.M.
She blinked realizing how tired she was and discovered that Kudo was still in the room. "Shouldn't you be asleep?" She asked him turning back to her work. "Not as badly as you should be. You've done enough for today, get some rest." "I'm fine." "Oh yeah? How much sleep did you get last night?" Haibara hesitated then said "6 hours." "Bullshit." Kudo responded flatly. "We both know for a fact you've gotten at best 2 and a half hours of sleep a night for the last 3 months. You're driving yourself into the ground."
"Since when do you care?" She snarled at him. He didn't answer and she remained silent until the 488th "subject dead" of the day appeared. "Fffffff-" she hissed. She did not need Kudo Shinichi of all people telling her what to do with her spare time. The hypocrite occasionally stayed up for several nights in a row. Why she hadn't the faintest but she could tell from the bags under his eyes.
"If I shut up will you go to bed?" "Fine." She stormed past him determined not to say a word to him the rest of the night. As she reached the upstairs she yawned and walked into her room. She skipped putting on pajamas and just went into her bed and stared at the ceiling.
She usually wasn't like this. She was more of a silently, brutally, and sarcastically take out her anger on others type of person. But right now she was full of rage and she was unsure as to why. She analyzed herself and came to the conclusion that it must be because of Kudo. He didn't seem to appreciate what she did for him. He seemed to just cruise along and take whatever pill she tossed at him, no thank yous or-
Her thought process was cut off by a soft knock at her door. "Come in" she heard herself say. In walked the shrunken teenager himself. "What?" She asked bluntly. "I want you to take a break." She sat up and stared at him incredulously. "What?" She asked again. "You need a break from this. It's destroying you. We've been trying this for 3 years. Look-" he cut off her incoming retort "I know you think I don't appreciate you. But I do care about you. Quite a lot in fact. We're in this together and while I want to go back to being me… I care about your well being more. So please. Take a vacation from the basement. At least two weeks. Sleep and relax. And also eat something. I've noticed how much weight you've lost over the past month. I know you think you're invincible when it comes to sleeping and eating enough but face it, you're going to pass out one day from sheer exhaustion. I'll see you tomorrow and I'm right down the hall if you need me. Sleep well." He exited and shut the door behind him.
Haibara stared at the spot he had been in for a solid 5 minutes before slowly lying back down. After a few minutes she stood up and walked down the hall to his room. She knocked and heard permission to come in.
She slowly opened the door and walked into his room shutting the door behind her. he looked up from the book he was reading and set it down. Ai sat down on the edge of the bed and looked down at her hands. She didn't know why to say. She was lost in emotion, lack of sleep, and the numbing pain being inflicted into her palm by her fingernail. She was drawing blood but she didn't care.
She opened her mouth to speak but could not find words to send out of her mouth. So she shut it again and looked at the person sitting next to her. He stared into her eyes and she shivered. She felt like he could read her like a book although she tried to keep that book closed. But here she was, at her weakest, trying to tell him how grateful she was, how he helped hold her together and she was ruining her chance.
She tried one last time to speak but could not. She looked down in self hatred at her inability to speak when it mattered most when he hugged her. Ai froze. She attempted to pull herself together, until her wall shattered and she began crying. At first small tears rolled down her cheeks but soon she was silently sobbing into his shoulder as Haibara Ai cried for the first time in 8 years.