You can probably tell from the title, but this is the Sight chapter: Jaffar/Nino.
Disclaimer: I do not own Fire Emblem or any affiliated characters, places or events.
Sunlight
by sagewolf
She was sunlight. Her laugh, her smile, her voice as she chanted a spell. All of them cast light into my mind, my spirit-- my life.
Before I had been a puppet, with no more identity or will than one of Nergal's most basic creations. There had been those who called me his pet murderer, his dog.
I was less than that.
A dog is loyal, wishing only to please its master, unquestioning, remaining true even when tormented, shunned, beaten. But loyalty requires the capacity for treachery; truth requires the possibility of falsehood. I could conceive neither; they were alien, incomprehensible. He had taken me off the streets, before I could remember.
At least that was what he said. Perhaps he had my parents killed the way he ordered hers killed, for the sake of the prodigy among the family. I do not know.
Then, I did not care. However he had acquired me, I was Nergal's. His hound of doom, his silent striker--
His Angel of Death.
I stalked the darkness, bringing those around me into it. Not against their will, of course. I was not so clumsy. They never knew I was there; they had no will, no choice in their fates. Just like me.
Her parents fell the same way, both of them, and the two boys who lived there with them. She wouldn't stop screaming for them. I had never held anything so tiny before. I realize as I remember; then I was younger than she is now. I found a shining metal necklace on the woman's neck, broke the chain and gave it to her, to calm her down.
The blood on my hands stained the chain, remained in the metal, remains to this day. Not her blood. I did not spill her blood.
I was so used to silence and darkness and solitude. She disturbed my world the moment she found herself in it. With her noise, her thrashing, her incessant cries, and the constant gleam of the necklace she would not let go of.
I gave her to Sonia and was done with her. So I was informed, and so I believed. I had new assignments, new marks, new skills to master. There was the Black Fang to penetrate, enemies to dispose of, spies to root out... I forgot the tiny baby who had so valiantly opposed her family's killer.
Opposed, disarmed, wounded-- destroyed. I am not that man now.
I saw her first, grown, with the Reed Brothers. Was she ten? Eleven? It was snowy that day, and the powder collected on her shoulders, her head, her cloak. She would shake her head or shrug, and it would fall in a tumbling, disconnected mass, leaving tiny, individual flakes to sparkle in the strands of her hair and the fibres of her clothes, a glittering halo of light all around her. She looked at me, her eyes bright and eager, full of all the promise her life didn't have, not with Sonia. Not with Nergal.
But she didn't know. Even if she had, it would not have dimmed her sunny outlook. Sonia was cruel to her, taunted her, insulted her, and still, all she wanted was to please her 'mother'. To make her proud. She emulated Sonia, learning magic, begging to serve the Fang, any way she could.
That was when I began to crack. I kept seeing her, and whether Fate brought me to her or I unknowingly sought her out, the crack grew with every laugh, every grin, every time she looked on me, or I on her. I did not seem to change. Not even to myself did I change then.
Yet the capacity for change grew. It grew to the point where I thought. Doubted. Questioned. My master gave me an order--
And I did not obey. I could not spill her blood, could not see it splash on the stone floors of Zephiel's chamber, black and cold.
I fought beside her, against the Fang, against Nergal and his morphs. The enemies fell before me, as numerous as leaves on the trees. If ever I tired, or weakened, I had only to look to where she fought, and her smile, her magic, her strength, would infuse me with new stamina and courage, and I would continue.
I could have continued for eternity. She was my light, my strength. With her near me, I could have gone on forever. I did not think it was love. What did I know of that? It was beyond my understanding. What I had was all I wanted.
I did not think of others. I saw nothing off-putting about the boy. He was kind to her, and he was a mage, like her. Sonia was the only mage she had ever known. The Hurricane she called 'uncle' and knew well; the shaman taught her to read, to decipher the secrets held between the silent bindings of books. What was the harm in a conversation? With the mage, the shaman, the Hurricane? I could not see.
Now I do. For she is my light, my strength. And in growing close to her, they take her from me. She smiles for the boy, laughs at the shaman, her eyes gleam when she looks at Hurricane.
None of them are strong. I could take her back. The boy is young and inexperienced; the shaman is distracted and slow; Hurricane is past his prime.
It would not be hard at all. Yet--
To do that, I would have to take them away from her. That... no. That I cannot do. Not to her.
I cannot bear to spill her blood; I cannot bear to dim her light.
Even if it ceases to fall on me.
-- -- -- (This was originally a TILDE but FFn killed it. It looked so much nicer too. T.T)-- -- --
(For those who don't know: the challenge mentioned in the summary is detailed on Xirysa's profile. Basically, what is required is a five-chapter fic (or five oneshots disguised as a five-chapter fic) focusing on any pairings, with each chapter based around one of the five senses. This was originally going to be a oneshot, but since it fit so well, I'll make it the first installment of my entry. xD As I write, I know what I'm doing for smell and taste, and possibly touch. I actually have Scent written: I just have to let it sit for a few days before I go over it. Now for the original A/N for this oneshot:)
This is probably actually the shortest thing I will ever write. (checks: 923 words. Damn right it is. xD) It was my first time at attempting this sort of interior monologuey thing (or any kind of romance), and I don't know why I did it. Just got a random idea on a Sunday night, I guess... sat down with a cup of tea and wrote this all in one sitting. (Then revised it a few days later, but there wasn't much to do.) I actually don't think it's ever said in their supports that Jaffar killed Nino's parents, so that is what is called 'artistic license.' The blood staining the chain of the locket and him seeing her with Lloyd and Linus-- that IS in the supports.
Y'know, I actually think this's kinda cool... This is very nearly the kind of stuff I actually like to read, if the angstiness was toned down. Maybe all the 'spiritual' fics I was reading eventually rubbed off on me... hmmm. Well, thanks for reading, anyway!
sagewolf out.