Chapter One: An Unexpected Trip

"Potter!" I screeched. Every single living thing fell silent in the Gryffindor Common Room.

"What?"

"I can't believe you have me on a substitute list!" I screamed. Potter was the captain and the seeker of the Gryffindor team and he had just posted who made the team. "I'm better then more then half of those sissies you have on the team! Heck, I'm better then you!"

"I think that's a bit of an exaggeration!" Potter rudely said.

"I'm surprised you could think at all!"

"Watch it, or I'll kick you off the team!" he threatened.

"You are such a pigheaded, idiotic, freakish…"

"I wouldn't finish that sentence if I were you!" he yelled. "Stop complaining, you made the team, didn't you?"

"I'M A SUBSTITUTE!" I screeched. "THAT'S NOT A GOOD THING!"

"Well, no one wants little Evans to get hurt! And really, not a lot of people want you on the team! That's why I put you as a sub! Even if the boys stink we wont have to deal with the ridicule of having the only girl in the entire school who's willing to go out for the sport on our…team," Potter slowed his last words, realizing what he had said. "You didn't really hear that, right?"

I gawked at him for a moment. "Potter," I said quietly. "I am so going to KICK YOU ASS!"

Big mistake to say that. Professor McGonagall briskly walked through the portrait hole right as I had made that screeching comment. Ashley Lemon scrabbled in quickly after her.

The professor gasped. "Ms. Evans! I am deeply appalled at you. We at this institute frown upon such language. Ten points will be taken from Gryffindor for use of fowl language."

"But Professor," I moaned.

"No buts," McGonagall headed for the exit. I expect better judgment from you, Ms. Evans," she stopped and turned to look at Ashley. "Ms. Lemon, I would like to thank you for coming and getting me so I would know of this fowl language." And she left.

I glared at Ashley. She was a blonde. What more could be said. (No offence to the smart blondes out there!!! You guys rock!!! Keep defeating the stereotype!!!) Her eyes were and empty blue and her had was only filled with thought of hairstyles and ways she could screw a guy. A total ditz.

Ashley rudely smiled back. Of course she would do something like this. She's the most popular girl in the Gryffindor house. AND she and Potter just broke up at the beginning of this year after a two-year relationship.

I turned back to Potter. Before I could say anything, he said," Nice goin', sub." He moved toward the stairs to his dormitory.

"Lily, I can't believe you would say such a thing like that," I spun around to see Ashley and her group of twits behind her.

"Ashley," I got within three inches of her face. "You better sleep with one eye open for a while. I know spells that could give you bad cuticles and split ends at the same time.

Her eyes widened and she wrapped her fingers around the ends of her long, strait hair. I smiled evilly then turned on my heel and walked out of the common room, heading for the library.

"Nice show in the common room, Carrot-Top," Sirius's voice came into my ear. I jumped in surprise. I was reading my charms book to see what kind of ghastly things I could do to Ashley and then Potter.

"My name is Lily, Sirius," I rudely yet quietly corrected. He sat down across from me and smirked.

"Carrot-Top is close enough," he replied.

Remus walked over to the table and sat down next to me, "Play nice, now, Sirius," he said. "Lily, I heard about what happened in the common room. Prongs can be a bit of a pain. But I know Sirius will convince him to change the team around," he looked at Sirius and put extra emphasis on his last sentence.

"Oh, sure," Sirius said, nodding. "Of course I will."

"Thank you, Black," I replied. "Now if you'll excuse me, I have to find a spell that will damage Ashley emotionally for a very long time," I stood up. Remus and Sirius stood up too, and then they smiled at each other, grabbed my arms and drug me out into the corridor.

They both stopped at a funny looking statue. It looked like and old, one-eyed lady with a hump on her back. "Let's go," was all that Sirius said.

I felt myself falling for what seemed like forever. All at once, we hit rock bottom and ironically we actually landed on a stone floor. All I could see were stairs. "Where are we?" I asked as I rubbed my aching head.

"You'll see," Remus replied. They helped me up then whisked me up the stairs. We ended up in the cellar of Honeydukes.

"We're in Hogsmeade?"

"Wow Carrot-Top," Sirius made his way up to the main floor. "You're getting pretty slow there."

"It's Lily!" I insisted. "L-I-L-Y! LILY!"

"Okay…Carrot-Top!" by now, we were out of Honeydukes and walking down the leaf-covered street. WE stopped in front of Zonkos.

"What are we doing here?" I stupidly asked.

"Why would you waste all of your time looking up and memorizing a charm when you can just modify a prank from Zonkos?" Remus asked, using a strange energetic tone.

"Well…" I paused. "Good point. I like the way you think, boys."

"Well," Remus said. "I'm not quite sure Sirius is capable of thinking, but I'll take the compliment!" He started walking towards the first aisle of pranks. "Let's go find you the perfect prank, Lil,"

"Okay," I said as I followed them through the first aisle. I walked up and down the aisles for what seemed like forever until one prank, in a tiny little box at the back of the store caught my eye. I read the back of the box and my expression changed from regular to extremely happy! I ran up to Black and Remus and told them about the prank.

"This is going to be fan-bloody-tastic!" I exclaimed as we exited the store. Ashley would not know what hit her. This was gonna get ugly!