How could I kill someone? I was an angel of the Lord killing the innocent. I was heartless, uncaring, my cruel dead eyes fixed on my prey as it stalked across the kill room floor. It moves like Dean, it acts like Dean, it is Dean down to the skin cells, yet it lacks things that make Dean, Dean.

The bright soul that shines in his chest is gone, replaced by grace, that shines unnaturally bright in the cavity that is supposed to house a soul. It just makes obeying Naomi easier, makes her orders to kill and torture fake Dean easier. When he cried out like Dean as I broke his arms, legs, hands, feet, ribs, and cheeks, I used to cringe.

His cries tore at my grace, as my hands continued to rip at his toned flesh. His face torn, and bleeding, pleading for me to stop. I tilt my head as if confused by his cries. Finally I pull my blade out of my trench coat pocket. With no hesitation I pull my arm back and sink my blade all the way to the hilt, hearing the tip pierce his heart.

Blood pours out of Dean's mouth as I hear his his heart furiously trying to pump blood. I slowly pull my blade out of his chest where the grace has flickered and died. I see Dean take a dying breath and watch him go still, his body adding to the hundreds of others that litter the kill room floor.

Naomi comes through the entrance clapping. "Well done Castiel." She comments. "No hesitation, no fear." She observes as she watches Dean's corpse. "You're ready." I nod my head in affirmation casting one last look at the dead Dean on the floor before striding out to go and fulfill my heavenly duties.


"I can't let you take that Dean." I say to him in my normal gravel tone, Naomi's control still reigning strong.

"How did you get out of Purgatory Cas?" He asks me, knowing that this is not normal behavior for me and the sane half of me is thanking my father for blessing him with these instincts.

"You have done this a thousand times." Naomi reasons with me. "You're ready... kill him, then take the tablet and bring it home where it belongs."

I stalk my way towards Dean as he sees slowly how this is going to play out. One of us was going to die and he knew that.

"Just tell me how you got out of Purgatory Cas, be honest with me for the first time you have been out.. and this is yours." He says, gesturing to the tablet tucked safely away in his muscled arms. The angel blade drops out of my trench coat pocket as I do everything in my reason to stop it. Naomi's control is too strong. I am powerless against an angel of her stature.

"Cas?" Dean questions me, his jade eyes flashing with hurt and betrayal. "Cas I don't know what the hell is wrong with you and if you can hear me, you don't have to do this." His words do nothing to stop my legs as Naomi sends me forward to kill the righteous man. "Cas." He calls one last time before I swing my blade towards him and he lifts the tablet just in time for my blade to hit it, causing a blue flash of light.

"This isn't right." I sputter.

"Think about what this can do for us, Castiel. For heaven."

I am frantically searching for answers in my thousands of years of experience settling on one definite answer. "I will not hurt Dean." I declare.

"Yes you will." She says, fixing her hypnotizing gaze on me. "You are."

"Cas, fight this. This is not you!" Dean shouts at me firmly. "Fight it."

I swing my blade again and blue flashes of light continue. I grab my head, intense pain overcoming me. "What have you done to me?" I shout at Naomi desperately.

"Just relax Castiel." She says in a soothing voice. "Just let your vessel do what you know is, deep down, the right thing."

"What have you done to me Naomi?" I desperately shout at her again.

"Who is Naomi?" Dean firmly questions me.

"What have I done to you?" Naomi shouts. "Do you have any idea what it's like out there?" She asks me. "There is blood everywhere and it's all on your hands." She says accusingly, somehow managing to fit a scathing note somewhere in there. "After everything you did. To us. To heaven." She says with the same accusing note. I panic internally, remembering each one of my brothers and sister's dying breaths as I sent them to the stars once and for all. "I fixed you Castiel. I fixed you!"

"Cas!" Dean calls out desperately as he puts his hand on my shoulder. Naomi's control takes over once again and I swing my arm up, knocking him backwards as Naomi's intent to kill Dean through me, rages on. He crashes into a pile of books, losing the tablet. Dean scrambles to get up and again takes the tablet but I am much faster that he will ever be and am in front of him before he can even blink.

Dean swings and I catch his fist in mid swing and twist causing an anguished cry to come from his lips and the tablet TO fall to the ground, breaking the stone tablet free from it's clay, protective casing. I swing again and again as Dean takes the hits like a pro every time. I honour his courage but if this does not stop he will die soon. I look at the tablet on the floor and Dean speaks with his normal hunter courage.

"You want it?" He questions. "Take it... but you are gonna have to kill me first." He says with that smug note only Dean Winchester can manage in these kind of situations. "C'mon you coward." He goads me on with clenched teeth. "Do it... DO IT!" He shouts. I swing again and I see that I hit him hard.

"Please." I plead with Naomi.

"End this Castiel." She commands.

I swing and this time I hear the bones crack in Dean's face as my fist connects. He is now panting, trying to stay conscious to save me.

"Cas." He says through bloodied lips. "This isn't you." He pleads weakly. "This isn't' you." He says again.

"Bring me the tablet." Naomi's voice commands.

I swing again but Dean keeps pleading.

"Cas, Cas, Cas, Cas." He says my name and every time I swing it just hurts me more. It feels like claws are tearing at my grace and it is ripping me apart from the inside out. I raise my blade slowly. Dean starts to speak lowly to me.

"I know you are in there, I know you can hear me." He says, reaching up to me and wheezing. "Cas... it's me." He says, pleading to someone who can hear him but can do nothing.

"We're family." He says brokenly, blood flowing into his mouth, slurring his speech. "We need you." He continues. "I need you." He finally gets out.

"You have to choose Castiel." She says. "Us or them." She says, giving me one last choice.

"Cas.. Cas." Dean pleads again.

I drop my blade and it clatters to the ground as I release my hand and he sputters in pain. I immediately go to the angel tablet and pick it up, the tablet's power connecting with my grace, making a high pitched whine. I feel the power piercing the hold she has on me and crumbling it until there is nothing left.

I look at the tablet, shocked that it could break her hold. Dean is staying quiet and bleeding to death in the corner. I can feel his body slowly shutting down as I stand there. I look at him wheezing and bleeding and my heart overcomes my morals. I stretch my hand out to heal him and he starts to struggle to get away.

"Cas... no... Cas no." He says again.

I pull my hand back and instead cup his face in my hands, looking deep into his jade eyes. I then kiss him gently and let my grace flow through him. His injuries heal and the blood dries. I move my lips gently along his and I feel his shock running through his body. Then suddenly his lips start to move with mine, in tangent. It was a sweet kiss and suddenly I pull back and stand up, taking the tablet and sticking it within my jacket, looking at Dean and suddenly disappearing.

I disappear only to the human eye as Dean slowly looks around and touches his lips lightly and sighs.

"Looks like another thing lost." He sighs. "He is never gonna love you back Winchester, you are a damn fool." I hear him whisper. He shakes his head and picks up his gun, shoves it in the back of his stone washed jeans and looks around with his inept hunter instincts, going back to his brother.

I look at the tablet in my hands and know exactly where to take it.

The room is filled with nothing but the sound of rustling wings.

A/N: Ok guys I have been thinking, this has great potential to be a multi chapter fic so if you would all leave a review telling me if you want it to continue or if you would like me to leave it as is or you can just leave a nice comment. That would be nice to. :-)