Phone Troubles

Story: Sasuke manages to lose his phone, and guess who finds it?

Pairing: implied SasuNaruSasu.

Hope you likey? (:

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"Oh fuck no. Shit. Shit. Shit. Crappy god damn karma."

A young man sat on the floor, violently abusing a cigarette between his index, thumb and middle finger, the contents of his bag scattered everywhere around him.

Smokes-check. Stationary-check. Notes-check. Lighter-check. Some other random shit-check. Phone… not there.

He kept on repeating his new mantra of 'fuck's' while inhaling another lung full of smoke. Moments ago he'd been very happy, having just returned to his dorm at Edinburgh University, knackered from the day at work and chilled from the cold October air.

God what he would do to just have a nice calm evening, but NO! Fate had something against him today. He had lost his bloody phone. The one thing that connected his mega-busy self with his friends. He wanted to scream, punch and kill something. Anything.

He finished his cigarette, throwing the butt end out of the slightly open window, and pulled the next one out of the pack. He paused for a moment to light the fresh cancer-stick and moved towards the door to retrace his steps to the bus stop. Maybe he'd lost it close by.

As he yanked open his room door with more vigor than needed, he came face to face with a shorter male, his hand up in the air suggesting he was about to knock on the door.

"Shikamaru?" he questioned his presence. Now was so no the time for interruptions. He was a guy on a mission.

"Sasuke." The guest acknowledged in return. "I got a call 5 min ago, from you. Apparently you've lost your phone." He continued.

Sasuke let out a long breath, breathed in again as he ran a hand through his dark hair, suddenly feeling relieved. He massaged his right shoulder feeling some of the tension leave, "So I'm guessing some moron found it and rang the first number?"

"Yeah, pretty much. Some dude found it at the train station. Was wondering if I knew the owner, since there was no 'home' phone in your contacts. He said he's willing to meet up and return it to you" Shikamaru stopped for a moment handing the other male his phone and turning around to walk off. "I hope I can trust you not to lose my spare phone while you get yours back."

"Hn" was all that was heard in the now empty corridor accompanied only by minor shuffling and shutting of the dorm door. Sasuke decided that he'd call the guy tomorrow.

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The table rattled rhythmically, followed by loud ringing.

'Situations are irrelevant now. She loves the way that I tease. I love the way that she breathes.'

Across the room, and body shifted under some sheets, exposing a blond head and a toned shoulder. Some more shifting, shuffling and swearing followed.

'I touched her…She touched my…It was the craziest thing.'

"Friggin' hell! You little shit of a phone" exclaimed the young man rolling out of bed with a loud thump. The song continued as he tried to free himself from a tangle of sheets.

'I love the girls who love to hate, because they're just like me. A certain girl she took my hand and ran it up her thigh.'

"For fucks sake. SHUT UPP. The hell's the damn time!!" he had given up on the untangling, crawling across the floor toward the desk. He supported his weight on his left elbow, as his right hand shuffled on the desk above him looking for the solid shape.

'She licked her lips, and pulled my hair. I fall in love for a night…'

"AHAA!" he shouted as he grabbed the phone. "Gotcha!" he quickly glanced at the time in the corner of the foreign phone. It read 7.37 am.

Before thinking he pressed the green button, as soon as the phone was at his ear he gave his wake up caller a piece of his mind, "You wanker. Who the fuck rings at fucking 7 in the damn morning on a fucking Saturday. You bastard. I am so fucking going to wring your neck when I see you, you piece of worthless c r a p …" he paused as he realized he had just shouted all this abuse down the phone to a complete stranger.

He lifted his other arm to scratch his neck in a nervous gesture "Ahahaa…umm...haha. Sorry I'm a bit cranky in the mornings." He said apologetically down the phone.

"You'd think, dumbass. After vocabulary like that." A voice answered from the other side. It was a deep, sensual and obviously groggy from sleep.

"You bastard!" the blonde replied automatically to the insult.

"Anyway, I'm not calling to have a conversation. I just want my phone back, idiot. Where, when and who?" the luscious voice said, pronouncing each syllable perfectly.

"The fuck. I find your crappy phone and am nice enough to return it and this is how you treat me, you asshole. Get a personality change and then call back." And the blonde hung up.

Down the other end of the like, a very pissed Uchiha looked at his phone with an expression of surprise. A smirk crossed his lips, and he pressed re-dial.

As the phone was picked up again "Hello fuck-shit. Decided to be nice yet?"

He answered calmly "Look, I don't have time and I really need that phone. Meet me in The Elephant Café next to the National Museum at 5pm today…" and with hesitance he added "Please."

"Fine, fine, bastard. How will I recognize you? You even have a name. I'm Naruto."

"Sasuke, tall, dark longish hair. I'll wear a red cardigan so you'll recognize me, okay?"

"Oh…Sounds good. See ya laters then" Naruto exclaimed down the phone.

He loved that chance of meeting new people. Even if they were cold bastards. He grinned, showing off his teeth as a thought crossed his mind. He whipped out the phone he'd found and quickly saved the number into his own phone, just incase. Haha. He was going to have sooo much fun, the little prick who woke him had hadn't a clue what was about to hit him.

Meanwhile, on the other side of town, an evil smirk possessed the pale face of a man who was thinking along exactly the same lines. He was going to make the moron pay for that little ear-bashing outburst this morning.

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As the meeting neared, Sasuke left his dorm and headed towards one of his favorite places in the city. It was close enough to the university campus and pretty quite, never too busy so he could always relax while there. As he entered through the door, a welcoming smell of coffee hit his nose. He was half an hour early and knew he had time for some of that caffeinated liquid.

He found a small table for two in the back corner of the café, next to a rather largish statue of a gold elephant decorated with green, blue and red stones.

He whipped out his paper and pencil and began to sketch some doodles, waiting for his phone savior to turn up.

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45 minutes and two coffees later, Sasuke was wondering if maybe the moron had got lost, but stopped when the café door was flung open with a bang.

"Whoa. Haaha. My bad." A man about his age apologized, closing the door.

Sasuke raised an eyebrow at the loud entrance while taking a sip of his latte. He looked the guy over; blonde hair, tallish, well built, with a smile way too big and was he wearing a green telly-tubbies tee? "Hn" he voiced his disapproval, moving his attention back to the pad of paper. The guy just had to ruin his looks with that childish top.

While the same blonde scanned the café for a tall, dark haired man in a red cardigan. He spotted him sitting in the back, shading intently in a sketch book. 'An artist, huh?'

He bought a cup of tea, and headed over to the small table.

As he placed the porcelain down on the table, making as much noise as possible, in front of the man he was supposed to meet, extended his hand and introduced.

"Hey there bastard. Naruto here."

He did note in the process of doing so, that this bastard was extremely good looking and was suddenly glad that he had save that number in his phone book.

Sasuke looked up from his work and smirked 'Follows. The moron sounding guy is indeed a moron.'

"Hn." He answered without making a movement in accepting the hand.

"Ha. You really do have a stick up that ass of yours!" Naruto laughed out loud, making sure that as many people as possible heard it. He sat down in the empty chair, dug out the phone from his pocket and said while sliding it across the table.

"You know, you have one annoying ring tone."

Sasuke glanced at the phone, checked it wasn't too beat up and took it off the wooden surface, stuffing it in is own pocket.

"Thanks are in order, no?" Naruto suggested, looking the other man in the eye.

"You wish, dead-last." Sasuke replied, turning his smirk up a notch and enjoying the angered and shocked look on the others face. What he did not expect though was the punch that followed.

He fell back and off the chair, the workers immediately running up to see what the commotion was about. Once assessing the situation, Naruto and Sasuke were both asked to leave the café before the manager decided to call the police. On top of everything, they were asked to leave the back way, since Sasuke's nose was bleeding pretty bad.

As soon as they stepped out the door the darker man turned around and attacked the other.

The two exchanged a series of kicks, punches, blows and even scratches; only calming down when they almost rolled into some dog crap, Sasuke being the first to sense the dangerous excrement on the pavement and suddenly jumping the other way. Naruto followed suit, and sat next to the young Uchiha leaning against the wall not quite knowing what caused the two of them to have such a … weird and silent fight.

He cringed as he looked down at him self; dirty, bloodied and bruised, but in no better state that the man sat next to him who was now pulling out a pack of cigarettes and stuffing one in his mouth.

As Sasuke noticed the other staring, he shook the pack towards the other in an offering gesture. Naruto took one and placed it in his mouth waiting for a light and maybe a word from the dark man to break the now awkward silence.

The lighter was thrown at him, quite rudely and he opened his mouth to comment "…" but decided against it. They didn't need another brawl.

Time passed as the two young men smoked away in a still slightly awkward but now a more comfy silence. Naruto took another drag and turned to look at Sasuke. Really look at him.

And he noted the puff of grey smoke leaving the others lips, which were turned up in a slight smirk and all his attention was aimed at the ending cigarette.

The blonde man, who before meeting Sasuke could easily say that he would never look at a man and think him attractive, was now taking back those words; his dark haired companion was very easy on the eyes, matching the husky voice he had heard on the phone perfectly.

As he was off in his own dream land he didn't see Sasuke turn his dark eyes towards him and open his mouth.

"Who knew, you actually have a brain in that idiotic blonde head of yours, moron." He said with the slightest upturn of the lip, bringing the other out of whatever he was thinking.

"Shut up, Sasuke-bastard. More thought goes on in here…" he tapped his head while grinning broadly, "than in your pretty little head." Ha.

"Pretty?" Sasuke lifted an eyebrow at that new expression.

"Yeah. Exactly. You're a right princess." Naruto laughed at his own joke, which turned into a coughing fit.

"Serves you right, retard" He was about to add more to the insult, but stopped. When had he scooped down the blonde's level and started bickering? He was a fucking Uchiha. And bickering is something you would NOT find in an Uchiha handbook.

Sasuke stood up with a light sway leaning onto the wall for support, the moron could definitely hold his ground in a fight. He was going to be limping for a while.

"Whoa. I knew you were a bastard…but you is also a right twat" the same blonde commented as he stood up and extended a helping hand to Sasuke. "I know for a fact your leg hurts like fuck so I'll take you to yours. Make sure no-one rapes you in your weakened state, Princess" he sniggered at the glare he received from the dark man.

"Fuck You." He managed to get to the end of the alley before his leg gave way, but a strong hold on his elbow caught him before he hit the ground.

"I don't think there's a choice now. You can't walk. I can." He picked him up bridal style and started walking, having to tighten his grip on Sasuke as the other started fighting him off.

"Fuck no. I'm not a fucking girl." He grit thought clenched teeth as he was trying to fight out of Naruto's hold.

:Put me down, dickless" But the other was just as stubborn to keep him in his own arms. Sasuke decided it'll be easies and faster if he just let the blonde moron carry him home, so he crossed his own arms and looked at the said moron in disgust.

"What, Princess? Not enjoying the free lift?" Naruto teased. He noticed how tense and uncomfortable the other was. Maybe it was time to get a move on.

"Right. Which way then, bastard?"

"The campus dorms. I'm guessing you'll know where those are"

Their fight and then the aftermath of sitting and smoking in silence dragged on for quite a while, and now it was nearing midnight on a Sunday. The lack of public transport forced Naruto to either catch a taxi or walk. Taxi is too complicated, so he ended up walking slowly in the right direction. He looked down at the handsome man in his arms and couldn't stop but smile at the sleeping form, the afternoon had been pretty exhausting.

He sighed out loud and as his warm breath tickled Sasuke's cheek, the other gave a small "Hmmm…" and buried his face in Naruto's chest, causing the owner of the chest to blush. Who knew cold, stoic bastards could be so cute and cuddly when asleep.

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Finally, once they were at the student accommodation building, Naruto woke the other man so he could drop him in his room. He was given some keys and a mumble of "43. It's room 43…" and the black haired man was back in his slumber.

He dragged the dead weight in his arms and his exhausted legs up 3 flights of stairs.

"Oh fucking hell. I hope fate had her laugh at me" the blonde was well passed beyond pissed, into not caring. He just wanted to sleep soo bad.

Opening the small but warm room, sleep was still the first thing on his mind so as soon as he put the other on the bed Naruto bottled his pride and joined.

That night Sasuke and Naruto had the best and most refreshing sleep that either of them had experience in a while.

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Warmth.

That was the first thought in Sasuke's head.

The nice warmth that was draped over his right side.

Wait…pause…rewind. Warmth?

Black eyes opened, squinting from the opened curtains and the light that was shining through. As he adjusted to the room, he looked at the source of warmth and was surprised to find a peacefully snoring blonde moron.

He really wanted to kick the doofus, and shout at him for thinking he was welcome in his god damned bed. The cheek of it. But he couldn't make his body move to carry out his thoughts. The man next to him was so … so… angelic? If that was the right term?

So he thought again, wound his arm around the slim waist and drifted off again. The smallest of smiles gracing his features. Maybe losing your phone wasn't such a bad thing.

Meanwhile, Naruto who had woken when the other had moved, sighed in relief as his bed mate quit staring, wound an arm around him and went to sleep again. Maybe bastards should lose their phones more often. This could be the beginning of something new.

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Song used for Sasuke's ring tone – Situations by Escape the Fate 