What Women Don't Want
WTF?- chp 1
House limped into the hospital and could feel the stares boring into him. Everyone seemed to be unpleased with him after the stunt he pulled yesterday. House only grinned to himself, shifting his backpack onto his shoulders so that it didn't slip off and kept on limping. It was a little strange though, everyone seemed to be giving him dirty looks, and surely pulling the fire alarm during clinic duty did not entitle him to the walk of shame. He was just starting to feel uncomfortable when Cuddy's voice echoed across the clinic.
"Dr. House," she yelled.
House continued limping, he could tell by her tone of voice that he didn't really want to have this conversation.
Cuddy sighed and walked quickly after him, "House," she called out again.
"Lives to save Dr. Cuddy," House replied.
"Not if you don't have a case," she countered, finally grabbing his shoulder causing him to stop.
"I thought being a doctor by definition meant you saved lives, case or not." House said lifting his cane to push the elevator button, but Cuddy got to it first pushing the cane back down.
"Not today," House gave her a funny look.
"Well in that case," House turned around but Cuddy kept her grip on his cane.
"After that stunt you pulled yesterday I'm hosting a seminar, a re-introduction to mannerisms of the work-place."
"Because I pulled the fire-alarm?" House asked amazed.
"Because maybe if people give you enough crap about having to attend then you'll stop doing this sort of thing."
"This isn't high school Cuddy, you can't send me to detention every time I do something wrong."
"If you're going to act like a child I'm going to treat you like one."
"You're going to get me to change by punishing everyone else?"
"Works like a charm with teenagers," she said with a wink and walked away from him, "If you're not in the conference room by 11, I'm taking the damages of the last MRI you broke out of your salary."
House was in a terrible mood when he got home; he unlocked the door and pushed it open hard so that it slammed against the wall for dramatic effect, not really serving any purpose rather than to make him feel better. He stormed into the kitchen, pulling out the whiskey from one of the cupboards and planned on getting thoroughly wasted by the end of the night. With Whiskey bottle and tumbler glass in hand, House made his way over to his couch where he would spend the rest of his night watching his soaps mindlessly.
After a considerable amount of time watching Lindsey get pregnant and Derek battle it out with George and with enough whiskey for the room to be spinning, House deemed it time to go to bed. He got up and stumbled violently, falling into the coffee table in front of him and swearing loudly. Rubbing his bad leg, he limped to the TV, world spinning still, trying to grasp at the off button. It was a vain attempt and House swore again and realized he was going to pass out soon and decided to abandon his task. He attempted to turn around but tripped over his own legs which seemed to refuse to move, causing him to fall over backwards into the TV with a loud crash. The broken glass and electrical sparks ravaged through his body and soon when the TV lay broken in a smoldering heap, House lay on top of it, mouth agape, completely unconscious.
House woke up to the sound of insistent knocking on his front door. He opened his eyes slowly and without fail the surging headache of his hangover pounded in his ears. He blinked stupidly and tried to move, everything ached. He turned on his side and let out a harsh, "OW!" as his hand dug into broken glass. Casting his eyes down he realized he was on top of his TV, which was completely broken and swore once more. The insistent knocking was like the boom of cannons on a medieval battle field; he pushed himself up carefully and limped painfully to the door. He opened it quickly and Wilson was left with his hand in the knocking position and with a look of surprise on his face upon seeing House's state.
"SHUT-UP," House shouted.
Wilson gave him a look over, "What the hell happened to you?"
"Hit and run accident," House murmured and turned around to follow Wilson eye's to the TV.
"Did you do that?" Wilson asked pointing at the TV as he walked into the apartment.
"No my hooker did, she wasn't pleased with the pay," House replied closing the door as quietly as he could behind Wilson.
"Did you whack it with a baseball bat, or your cane?" Wilson asked amazed trying to avoid stepping on the broken glass but failed which caused House to wince.
"Big Foot, sit down and shut up," he ordered closing his eyes.
"Where? Glass is everywhere and," Wilson cut off as he saw the empty Whiskey bottle, "How much did you drink last night?"
"Enough that I managed to fall into the TV," House finally admitted.
"You fell into the TV?" Wilson turned around concerned, "Are you alright, do you need to be checked?"
"I'm fine, just a massive hangover," House said weakly, "Why are you here," the thought suddenly dawned on him.
"Cuddy, she wants your ass in work," Wilson replied still staring at House concerned.
"Oh I don't want to be late to class," House muttered sarcastically.
"House get yourself checked out, TV's have got all kinds of voltage running through them-"Wilson was saying when House cut him off.
"If I need a mother I'll ask Cameron to dote on me, for now I just need a ride to work," House replied, looking around for a suit jacket.
"You look like shit," Wilson said taking in the rumpled clothes House had worn yesterday, the midnight shadow over House's jaw and the deep sunken, blood shot eyes that were the tell-tale sign of a massive hang-over, "Cuddy's going to have your head on a silver platter if you go into work like that."
"Whereas if I spend any more time getting ready she's going to be serving my ass as the main meal so let's go," House picking up the jacket from yesterday and throwing it on. He limped to the door, opened it and walked out to the street where he was met with the sight of his neighbor, a woman of about 30, making her way to her car.
I hope he doesn't see me
"Too late already saw you," House announced and the woman turned to him with a slightly embarrassed look on her face. Wilson came up behind House and gave him a puzzled look.
"Good morning Dr. House," the neighbor greeted him and turned her back to him unlocking the door to her car.
"Good morning Janet, "House replied back.
It's Jane
"No need to be touchy," House replied amused, Wilson's brow furrowed and the woman turned to look at him confused.
"Who's being touchy?" She asked.
Asshole
"Hey no need for name calling," House said slightly shocked, his neighbor and him barely exchanged greetings let alone insults.
"House what are you talking about?" Wilson asked him, House turned to him confused and back to the woman.
Oh god, he's probably high or wasted again. He was making a lot of noise last night doing God knows what.
House stared at her amazed, she had said something but her mouth hadn't moved. "Did you hear that?" He asked Wilson.
The neighbor gave him a slightly frightened look, "Goodbye Dr. House," she muttered and got into her car.
The man's insane.
"Hear what?" Wilson asked House a little concerned.
"She just called me insane," House said pointing to the figure of the disappearing car down the street.
"She just said goodbye," Wilson replied putting his hand on House's shoulder, "You sure you're all right?"
"After the goodbye, she said I was insane," House insisted.
"We're getting you checked out," Wilson replied and ushered House towards his own car.
How you guys liked it, sort of an intro chapter, more to come!
