I do not own vampire academy or the characters the very amazing Richelle mead owns these incredible books
Rpov
Love fades.. Mine has…..
I couldn't breath, I couldn't do anything, I dropped my head the words cut me in half, and the look I seen in his eyes told me I was wasting my time, and if I was being honest with myself I was tired of trying, I was broken and I just wanted to give up.
I didn't bother looking back, there was nothing to look at , the man I once loved was lost and I wasn't strong enough to try and bring him back, I couldn't save him…
I could feel him watching me as I walked out of the church I never let one tear fall, I wouldn't allow him to see that, nobody would see that.
I Could feel her in the bond, her feelings were all over the place, she was mad I pushed him, she was mad I talk to him, but part of her was sad, sad that I lost him..
Rose… what did you think would happen? I told you to leave him be, you didn't listen, I'm sorry rose, he's been through a lot just let go.
Her words weren't harsh, no they were soft and meaningful and it boiled my blood even more, truth be told, I could never hate dimitri but in this moment, I most definitely hated Lissa..
He wanted her, praised her and vowed his life to serve and protect her all for saving him…. And what do I get? four meaningless but very strong and hurtful words thrown in my face. Lets not thank me for dropping out of school flying across the country to save his ass… no lets for get breaking a dangerous man out of prison and risking the lives of my friends and my own…. I didn't matter to him… all that mattered was her.
This shouldn't surprise me, I was raised always knowing I could never have a normal life, I was trained to kill and protect her very race, that's what I do…. Even when it kills me.
There was a storm brewing outside, and for once I found peace and comfort in the dark clouds and the cracks of lighting in the distance. I watched then rain start to fall from my bedroom window, the world outside these gates was a life I longed for once again.
The knock at the door pulled me from my fantasy world, I curse the person intruding, why cant they just leave me alone…. Just once…
When I flung the door opened I couldn't mask the laugh that came from my mouth, there before me stood a very soaked and pale blue eyed Christian.
I didn't want company, but I didn't feel like auguring nor did I want to be completely alone..
Christian look like he was struggling to find the words to say, but he knew as well as I did there weren't any.. Not for this.
" Rose, I heard what happened I really don't know what to say, but I know how this all feels, you know I do"
" I know you do, seeing him fawn over her is killing me Chris, this whole situation is killing me" I didn't hide the anger or disgust in my voice, there was no sense in hiding how I felt when it showed in my eyes.
He sighed, as much as he loved her, he let her ago, it was reaping him apart,
" how did this get all out of control?" he waved his hands around to the surroundings, I dropped my head wondering the same thing.
A crack of lighting broke the silence and as I looked out at the flashes in the sky I knew what I needed to be whole again.
I pointed to the window " I want to be out there, in the real world, I want a normal life, go to a real college with friends whose biggest worry is what band there going to see next" my smile fell…
" but I'll never have it, I will be stuck here playing second best like I always have, watching her fix him while I stand in the background and wonder whose going to fix me?"
" you miss it out there don't you?" he wasn't asking, he was simply stating a fact aloud.
It surprised me how Christian could read a person, and luckily for him he couldn't miss something he never had, he didn't remember the real world, just a academy behind iron gates, the only life some of us only know is a gated life.
" what about being a guardian rose? You love kicking ass, would you give it up for all that" he glanced to the window.
Again he was correct I loved my job….
" I don't know if I can be the great guardian I know I am if I stay here, I am suffocating there is no escape here" .
Christian pondered my words, and I watched him stand and walk towards the door, when his hand was on the handle he turned back to me and I almost barely heard him whisper.
" what if you could have it all, the whole thing?"
I didn't understand and it must of showed on my face cause he went on.
" I mean, what if you could be a guardian and have a normal life, away from here and out there, have that normal college life with those brainless friends? " those crystal blue eyes told me this was no joke, he was serious.
" its not possible, trust me if it was I would be gone without a hesitation"
He opened the door and walked out, not another word about it, the door closed and I collapsed on the couch, I closed my eyes and let the sleep take me over, were hopefully I wouldn't be haunted by his Dimitri's face….
Cpov
I left rose's room with a crazy and wild idea, I couldn't stand to see her broken, and I was going to fix her.
I was on my way to Hans office to discuss having rose as my guardian, she could leave with me to California and attend college with me, she could kick ass and have a life, we both deserved it.
And I agreed I couldn't hang around here and watch lissa pawn over dimitri…
I was knocking on Hans door as lissa and "Him" where walking out, and just like that we ran smack into one another.
"oh, Chris I'm sorry didn't expect anyone to be right out side, are you ok?" her voice was still sweet as music and my heart ached to be this close to her, yet so far away.
" I'm fine lissa my apologizes I should have been paying more attention" I flashed what I hoped was a friendly smile.
I wasn't prepared for a chat, not with them together, I wasn't going to get lost in her charm, I was on a mission, and I was going to accomplish it.
" lissa I hate to be rude, but I was hoping to speak with Hans before he left for the evening"
" oh.. Well of course, we can catch up another time" I didn't watch her walk away, I don't think I could have..
Hans and I walked in to his office closing the door behind us. For someone of his rank his office was more like a cramped closet with paperwork strung all over the place with a small wooden desk and two chairs.
" sit down Mr. Ozera , and tell me what can I do for you" boy this guy likes to get to the point huh? This might be a little more complicated then I thought….
" I want rose Hathaway as my guardian, and I would like this to happen with the hour" I guess it wasn't that complicated after all, he was speechless staring at me as if I completely lost what sanity I had, but then again look who my parents where.
" your serious? You want rose Hathaway to be your guardian? " I just said that didn't I? this guy was a moron….
"yes" was all I said, I think I made that clear the first go around
" your aware she's been pre requested by the princess?"
" I'm very aware of this and I am willing to bet that the queen would have no issue with letting rose be my guardian, and I'll even add a nice donation to the royal court, just give the queen a call and I'll be on my sir"
He stared blankly at me before picking up the phone and making the call I hoped would change both my life as well as rose's.
Rpov
My back was stiff when I woke up on the couch, I laid back down and let yesterdays events come floating back…
Dimitri didn't want me, lissa was pushing me away….. They had each other.
I muffled my screams with one of the ugly couch pillows, I was falling more apart, why did this have to happen, I couldn't wrap my mind around it all. I felt betrayed… I felt un needed.
I drugged myself to the shower, a nice hot shower would feel amazing and I hoped it would ease some of the pain…
A 30 minute shower was just what I needed, I felt refreshed.. I didn't plan on leaving the room today, I checked the bond and found lissa and dimitri in his room. She was watching something on TV and he… well he was dimitri sitting there looking all sexy reading a stupid western.
I was pulled from my vision by someone shaking me.
"rose, rose are you ok?" well scare the shit out of me, it was only Chris.
" just checking in making sure, I am clear to maybe grab some breakfast" I stated.
He was smiling today, I haven't seen him smile in such a long time, his eyes were so blue and his skin was shinning, he looked more gorgeous then I have ever noticed.
" instead of that why don't you pack your stuff, were leaving the royal court" I was dumbfounded, he had to be on drugs….
" Christian what the hell are you going on about"
He pointed to the very same window I pointed to last night " I'm talking about going out there away from here and them, I'm talking about you being my guardian."
" what!" now I was more confused then ever.
" last night after I left you , I realized I want to go away I cant stay here, and neither can you, so I went to Hans and asked for you to be reassigned to me, to leave with me today and move to California"
I was hanging on every word and I surprised him by running into his arms..
" are you serious? We can leave… I can leave? "
" yes rose, we can leave" his smile was the most magnificent thing I have ever seen. " we can leave the gates, the rules, we can leave them"
It was that right there the sold the deal " we can leave them" those four meaningful words, that gave me hope of smiling like he was, that maybe I could be happy.
" I don't want them to know until were already gone, and I don't want them knowing where we are" was my reply..
After I signed the papers stating I accept my charge, we decided to pack light, we would start new, with only 30 minutes before our plane was to leave, we took our last stroll around the court, ending at hans office, I glanced at Christian and he nodded, we were really doing this we were leaving, with out a second to spear I opened the door to hans office.
" hans before we leave, there's a favor I was hoping you could do for me?"
" no rose, I will not tell the queen off for you" the smirk on his face was almost unseen, you had to know hans to know he was making a joke.
" well damn…" I was joking back, but now it was time for the real reason " I was wondering if you could give this to dimitri" I handed him the letter I had wrote to him, I didn't bother writing lissa everything I needed to say to them was in his letter and by the time they read it, I would be gone…
No… I would be free
Alright guys this is my first fanficiton, so please be nice J comments and reviews are always nice!
