New story time! Here lies the epic romance of Mikeward. It will probably only be a few chapters long, but the plot will be slightly parallel with Twilight with a few changes.
Stephanie Meyer would not be a happy camper if she saw what I was doing with her characters. Shhhh...
One thing I could respect humans for is their ingenuity. I felt the car hug the turns as the speed kept increasing, the needle on the speedometer hit 130 miles per hour. It was times like this I was glad no one could read my mind, all they would hear is Broom broom, eeeeek, brrrroooooooooom. I'm sure Jasper could feel my glee, this was the only time he wouldn't bitch at me for my emotions.
I slowed down to a more human speed as we came across busier roads. I couldn't wait for the day to be over, I would go driving when the humans would be asleep and my family would be fornicating. I quickly changed my mind, not wanting Alice to see me screeching around Forks in my automobile mimicking its noises and running the usual commentary "Masen makes the turn, dodges the deer racing across the road and swerves to hit Lauren Mallory, the crowd goes wild!" This would be followed by my imitation of a roaring crowd and an Emmett like fist pump.
I prepared myself for the sound barrier, the point where the mental voices of Forks would hit me like a sledgehammer to the groin. I felt Jasper reach his limit and the little wave of despair he sends out before he gets control of himself, mine was next.
I grunt as the cacophony swarms my mind. It takes me a while to get my bearings, even with my massive brain. I focus on my siblings minds, tuning the others out. Rosalie is thinking about the book she read by Sun Tzu, Emmett was thinking of ways to reduce the National Debt, Alice was blocking me by mentally humming Mozart, knowing just how much Mozart annoys me and Jasper was thinking of eating people again.
The hum of the school relaxed into the back of my brain, I sighed in the years I had learned that human minds were so alike in their thought patters that it was easier to get the important information out of the collective consciousness than trying to focus on individuals. Today the gestalt student body thought of latest conquests, gossip, sexual fantasies and a new student.
Forks high was a buzz of excitement, two influxes of new students in one week, truly they would be discussing this for years to come 'The Great Forks Population Boom.' I snorted, earning looks from the others. "There's a new student starting today,"
"But it's Friday, who starts school on a Friday?" Emmett was as astute as ever. Rosalie shrugged "at least it takes the attention off us, I'm sick of dodging wood in crowded hallways." Jasper and I winced, she may be surrounded by erections, but at least she didn't have to deal with their fantasies and feelings. There was no way in hell I would get used to people thinking about my sister that way. Alice remained strangely quiet, still humming that twat, Mozart.
We parked and exited the car, heads turned towards us, but we were quickly redirected back to gossip about the new student. I gathered what information I could about the new girl "apparently she's Chief Swan's daughter, they are trying to imagine what she looks like by imagining the Chief in a school dress with pigtails. It's quite humorous." My siblings shuddered at the mental image.
I scanned the parking lot and was mesmerized. The bluest eyes I'd ever seen looked back, seemingly looking into my soul. Their depth swallowed me in, I was just a charmed snake in their presence. Alice shoved me, breaking the spell. I kept moving, but kept focus on the hypnotic eyes. My vision moved out, taking in detail of the eyes' owner. Fair complexion, like porcelain with a blush of rose. Honeyed locks of hair with golden hues. Soft pink lips, begging for attention, and a nose perfectly proportioned to make the face a masterpiece of perfection. A living incarnation of Rafael's cherubs.
Utterly fascinating, I had never been so intrigued by someone in this existence. I would have to befriend this person, he would become a schoolyard chum. I had to know him. Very few thoughts were centered on him, people still clinging to the image of Charlie in a long brunette wig. This was a crisis, I had to know him. I zeroed in on the Stanley girl's mind, whimpering as as her mental voice screeched like the harpy she is. The name Mike caressed my neural pathways. Focus! I chided myself, the boy with the face of an angel, had the name of an angel. Michael.
Why had I not seen him sooner? Had he been unwell? I tried to pinpoint his mental voice in the hubbub, relief surged in me when I found the voice. Can't believe I have to catch up on 4 days work, this is going to suck. Tyler should have got the suspension, he threw the first punch, not me. It's not my fault Lauren tried to sleep with me. Oh god, there's Jess. I just can't be bothered with her crap today.
I could sympathize, in every school there was at least one female who convinced herself she was the one for me. Usually it was some goth girl with a death wish, only they would be dumb enough to ignore their instincts and chase after the "brooding and mysterious" Edward Cullen. Thankfully none of them picked up on the whole Vampire thing. I did not need another Anne Rice.
There was a dull roar behind the noise of teenagers. It was the vehicular version of a death rattle, what on earth was the driver doing to that car? I could see Rosalie scowling, she abhorred abuse of any machinery. I focused back on Michael, at least there was someone at this school who could hold my attention. He was currently swatting away the Stanley girl as she kept trying to stroke his arm. God damn it, I don't want to go back to Doctor Gerandy for crabs. Once was enough, not to mention shaving my pubes for a week after. That was hell. I couldn't help the twinge of annoyance, she had taken advantage of him? Poor man, she must be a succubus. My thoughts went to Tanya and the various ways she had tried to seduce me, thankfully Carlisle had taken pity on me and created the worlds first Male Vampire Chastity Belt.
Maybe Mike would like a chastity belt of his own.
My thoughts were drowned out by that infernal noise. A faded red truck entered the parking lot, a shudder went through Rosalie and I. It was a classic Chevy, mistreated beyond anything I'd ever seen. We made a hasty retreat to our classrooms, there is no way we could be in its presence any longer. Rosalie was silently mourning the truck, remembering when they were first brought out. 1953 was a good year for trucks, Emmett had the same type of truck in storage.
My siblings headed to their various classes, I headed to English. As usual I retreated into the minds of others, Michael was thinking about the new student, Bella. I watched his observations, silently giggling as she fell over. Poor girl's first class was PE, judging by her performance she could have given Charlie Chaplin a run for his money. I wonder if they're distantly related.
I was called to answer a trite question about Romeo and Juliet, my half arsed response was met with jubilation by the teacher. I zoned out again, I much preferred D H Lawrence and George Bernard Shore. School curriculum often favored the over-rated, sometimes I wondered if teachers secretly tried to turn children into mindless zombies using Shakespeare as a brainwashing agent.
As I returned to Michael's mind I couldn't help but growl lowly, the silly girl had hit him with a volleyball. How dare she! I kept focus, ensuring there was no concussion. As the bell rang I sighed in relief, now he could get away from Forks own Weapon of Mass Destruction.
Fortunately, Michael was in my class next. Maths was something I could tolerate, it was analytical and precise. I almost squealed when I was sat behind Michael, I caught his scent for the first time and thought I had died and gone to heaven, he smelled like leather and Axe body spray. Venom rushed through my body, my skin felt like it hummed with pleasure. I shook my head and tried to focus.
Michael was struggling to get through the work, I felt for him. I too had been on the receiving end of Lauren's seduction, thankfully she gave up quickly. He had fallen quite a bit behind and was worried about his standing on the football team. The teacher approached Michael and I felt him internally groan. I decided to run interference, at full speed I finished the work and met the teacher just in front of Michael's desk. "All finished Sir"
"That was incredibly quick Edward, are you sure you don't want to review?"
"No Sir, I was in an advanced class in Alaska. I've done these problems countless times"
"Perhaps you can help Mike here?" I couldn't believe my ears, I repressed another squeal and smiled at Michael. The tenure of his mind was relieved, but at the same time irritated. Maybe he didn't like having his weaknesses pointed out. Poor fellow, I know how he feels. I was forever emasculated by my family.
The lesson passed in a haze of jubilation. Michael, or Mike as he preferred to be called, was most thankful. I had made a new friend. We managed to get through the days work easily and Mike invited me to his place to work on the rest tomorrow. I learned his father owned the Sporting Goods store, I just knew I could convince Carlisle to start shopping there for our camping supplies.
While the morning was excellent, the subsequent classes were less than ordinary. The Stanley girl saw me chatting with Mike and forced her conversation on me during History and tried torturing me into joining her for lunch.
Thankfully, Mike was in my sights during lunch, he was trying to talk to the infernal new girl who kept blushing, spluttering and looking in my direction. I strained to listen to Mike, but it was no good. Alice got my attention "what are the new girl's thoughts like Edward?"
"Huh? Oh, all thoughts are the usual things. She's being told about us at the moment." In truth I hadn't heard a damn thing. I couldn't be bothered. I went back to concentrating on Mike, swooning slightly as his voice entered my mind. I don't know why Lauren and Jess are so critical of the Cullens, they probably got rejected. God knows if I had a sister as hot as theirs I would pretend to be in a relationship with them to get away from those two bitches. I don't know what the other's are like, but that Ed dude is OK. I'm OK? My heart lifted, he wasn't repulsed by my nefarious Vampy vibes. I quickly tampered down my emotions, not wanting to alert Jasper.
Our family dispersed at the sound of the bell, it was time for Biology. I knew Mike had this class and couldn't wait, I hoped I would be able to work with him again. Unfortunately, my morning luck went and completely died, decomposed and departed. Mike had to resume his normal partnership with the Stanley girl and I was left to my self. Could be worse I thought, and because fate hates me it was. The late bell rang and the infernal Swan entered, I kept my face as emotionless as possible, but couldn't hold my temper in when she stumbled reminding me of how she mercilessly hurt Mike with the volleyball. As I caught her scent I gagged, for the first time in my vampire life I tried not to vomit. Her blood smelt of fish, just like Chief Swan's.
Of course, because fate likes to kick a man when he's down she became my partner for the rest of the year. I turned the full force of my black, murderous glare on her. She let her hair fall over her face, sending another waft of fishy air my way. Good lord, if I was going through my rebellious period I would snap her neck and be done with it. I was struggling to breathe, trying to keep myself from throwing her out the window as far as I could.
Mike gave me a sympathetic look. Poor dude, she probably stabbed him with a pencil. I kept as still as I could, counting down the seconds before my reprieve. I couldn't wait to get as far away from this fish woman as possible.
The bell became my beacon of hope, I moved as fast a humanly possible to the car. Taking large gulps of fresh air along the way. Thank god tomorrow is Saturday.
