This was a silly idea I had floating around in my head for a while. It's actually based off of an experience my cousin had when she was five. I had fun writing it, I hope you have fun reading it!
Disclaimer: I do NOT, however unfortuanate it may be, own MD:TAS or any other part of the Mighty Ducks franchise. Of course, DISNEY, if you wanted to give it me, I'd be a very happy panda!
By-Bye Binky
"This is the stadium…this is the locker room…this is the elevator…"
Wildwing listened with amusement as his little brother gave his new pet a grand tour of the Pond. Nosedive hadn't stopped talking to the turtle since they'd bought it at the pet shop that afternoon.
"…this is the kitchen…and this is the lounge, full of all your new friends!" Nosedive concluded as they joined up with the rest of the team. "Everyone, say hello to your newest roommate!"
Duke looked up from his newspaper, Tanya and Mallory turned away from the TV, and Grin cracked an eye open to glance at their 'newest roommate.' "That's what you got?" Mallory asked.
"We all agreed that a turtle was the best option for Nosedive as a pet," Wildwing told her.
"Yeah, but when we said turtle, I think all of us were imagining something with an actual shell. That thing looks like it's straight out of the soup pot."
"Hey! Don't talk about him like that! It's not his fault he's only a baby!" Nosedive cried, outraged by the idea of his precious turtle being made into a meal. "Don't worry, Binky, your shell will get harder as you grow up."
"You named it 'Binky' Why?" Duke asked, trying to suppress a chuckle.
Nosedive rolled his eyes. "Because 'Pacifier' is too long, duh!" He turned his attention to the creature in his arms. "Come on, Binky, I'll show you my room, where people won't make fun of your name or threaten to cook you!"
The others watched as the teen marched off to his quarters, mumbling something about "…barbarians…" as he went.
"Well that's going to get old quick," Tanya commented.
Mallory laughed. "I know. Seriously, 'Binky'?"
"Come on, guys," Wildwing interjected, standing up for his younger brother. "After the whole Baby fiasco, everyone agreed that Nosedive should get a pet to keep him company."
"Yeah, but what's wrong with a goldfish?" Duke asked as he folded up his newspaper.
"You can't hug a goldfish."
"You can't really hug a turtle, either."
"The little one's energy is good, and will bring great comfort to our young friend," Grin stated as he continued his meditation.
"Grin's right. Nosedive's really just a kid, and kids should have pets. Besides, that turtle may teach him some responsibility."
"Alright, Wildwing," Mallory sighed as she turned back to the news. "But if I find Binky in one of my shoes, we're having turtle-kabobs."
"There you go, Binky. Want some bubbles?" Nosedive crooned to his turtle. He'd had him for a week, and had not only taken exquisite care of him, but, somewhat remarkably, had also kept him from getting on anyone's nerves. Of course, Nosedive's affection for the turtle was almost sickeningly sweet, but the team was dealing with it.
"Giving Binky a bath, huh?" Wildwing asked as he joined the younger mallard at the kitchen sink. "Don't you think you ought to put the stopper in there?"
"Nah, that thing's disgusting," Nosedive replied shaking his head. "I mean, we put that in there along with dirty dishes and stuff."
"So how are you going to keep the water in there?"
"I stuffed a pair of my gym socks in the drain."
Wildwing stared at his brother.
"Hey, Wing, I'm going to go buy Binky some more food, could you keep an eye on him?" Nosedive asked as he set the turtle in the sink full of water and bubbles. "You don't actually have to stay here with him, just check on him and get him out after half-an-hour or so."
"Sure thing, Dive."
"Thanks, bro."
Wildwing watched his brother head for the elevator, then watched as Binky disappeared beneath the bubbles. "For your sake, those best not be toxic to turtles," he commented before heading into the lounge to read a book.
He'd gotten about a chapter in when he Mallory let out an agitated yell. "Who clogged the drain? Is it really that hard to put your food in the trash?"
Wildwing, realizing what she was about to do, jumped up from his chair. "Mallory, NO!" he cried before hearing the sound of the garbage disposal coming to life.
"Binky, I'm HO-OME!" Nosedive called in a sing-song voice as he walked through the doors of the elevator, a paper bag under his arm.
"Nosedive!" Mallory and Wildwing jumped as he entered the kitchen.
"Hey guys," he said as he set the bag on the table. "Man, you wouldn't believe how much variety they have in the way of turtle food, so I just got Binky some of everything."
"Uh, that's great, Dive," Wildwing commented as he moved to stand in front of a shoebox on the counter.
"So, how did my little Binkster behave while his daddy was gone?"
"Uh, well about that, you see…"
"Hey, you two figured out what to tell Nosedive yet?" Duke asked as he sauntered in. Upon seeing the teen, he immediately tensed.
Wildwing sighed. "I guess the best thing to do would be to just tell him. Dive," he started, turning towards his brother. "It's about Binky…"
"Oh, I get it," the younger duck interrupted. "You guys let Binky stay in his bath too long. Well, don't worry, I'll love even if he is all pruned."
"Try puréed," Duke murmured. Mallory shot him a look.
"Dive," Wildwing started again, "Binky's dead."
Nosedive stood there. A pale sheet covered his face. Suddenly he got his color back. "Oh, very funny, Wing. The old 'you're pet is dead' gag. Well, I'm not falling for it. Binky, Binky, where are you?" he began calling.
"Oh, come on, Nosedive, he's not kidding!" Mallory exclaimed. "I turned on the garbage disposal and mutilated your turtle. He's in the box," she finished quietly, turning to brown container.
There was silence for about a minute. Finally, Nosedive made his way over to the counter. Slowly, he opened the lid of the box for about half a second, then slammed it closed.
"BINKY!" he cried before throwing himself on the box. "WHY?"
"Well if you hadn't put the stupid thing in the sink…" Mallory began before Wildwing cut her off.
"Mallory didn't mean to do it, Dive, it was an accident," he said as he wrapped is arms around his grieving brother. "Come on, Binky's in a better place now."
Nosedive wiped his nose before looking up at him. "Did he…suffer?" he asked, squeaking out the last word.
"Well…" Wildwing thought back to the sound of the disposal's blades chopping away at the turtle…
"It couldn't have been more peaceful," Duke stated.
Nosedive nodded. "I guess that's good." He stood up, cradling the shoebox in his arms. "We should plan a funeral, Wing."
"Sure, Dive, anything you want."
"And everyone can speak at it, talking about how much they loved…BINKY!" Nosedive started wailing again as Wildwing led him to his room.
"Peaceful my ass," Mallory said as soon as she was sure the brothers were out of earshot. "What you'd tell him that for?" She turned her attention to Duke.
He shrugged. "It wasn't a complete lie. If you're going to die by garbage disposal, there wasn't a more peaceful way to go. I mean, he had bubbles, he was swimming, and those socks did manage to jam the disposal eventually."
"Well, if Nosedive thinks I'm going to a funeral for a turtle, he's nuts."
"Hey, come on, you did KILL his pet."
She crossed her arms. "Fine. I'll go. But I still say he shouldn't have put the stupid thing in the sink in the first place!
That evening the entire team gathered at one of the small lots of land in the Pond's parking lot. Wildwing had dug a shallow grave at the base of a tree. Nosedive was still clutching the shoebox close to him as the others started to give their eulogies.
"Binky was a good turtle," Wildwing began. "He didn't eat a lot, and he didn't make much of a mess. I believe he truly loved us, despite our short time together."
Nosedive hugged the box closer.
"He really loved to swim." Duke stated. "I think he was cleaner than any of us."
Nosedive began to breathe heavier.
"When you talked to him, it seemed as if he really understood what you were saying," Tanya continued.
Nosedive choked back a sob.
"His aura was always good. One of the best I've ever seen."
Nosedive wiped tears from his eyes.
Mallory sighed. Despite her belief that a funeral for a turtle was ridiculous, her guilt over having done the creature in got the best of her. 'I guess I should say something,' she thought. "Binky was one of a kind. You wouldn't ever find another turtle like him. He was soft and caring. He was a good friend."
Nosedive fell to his knees and began bawling.
"It's time to let him go, baby bro."
"I c-c-can't Wing! He's so alone!"
"Come on, I'll get you another turtle."
He shook his head. "Mallory's right, you couldn't find another one like him. I'll have to live the rest of my life without him!"
Wildwing sighed. "Look, you can't just keep him in that shoebox forever. It's not healthy."
Grin laid a hand on the teens shoulder. "Let your friend rest in peace."
"Peace? How can he rest in peace without…ME!" Nosedive began wailing again.
Awkwardly, Mallory leaned down and wrapped her arms around him. "I'm really sorry, Dive. But, you know," she added, trying to cheer him up, "Binky wouldn't want you to spend the rest of your life mourning him. He'd want you to remember all the good times, like…" she struggled to remember something happy about the turtle.
However, her lack of memory didn't stop Nosedive from appreciating what she was saying. He let his shoulders fall. "You're right." He placed the box in the hole, which Duke started to fill. "Bye-bye Binky. I love you."
That's right, my cousin killed her turtle with the garbage disposal! Again, she was only five (that's also why I named the turtle Binky, after her's, just in case you were wondering). So no, this wasn't a totally random fic.
Speaking of random, there's a group of guys outside my dorm singing 'Slim Shady.' Weird.
Anyway, I hope you liked it! Please make me a happy panda (since Disney won't) and review!
