The Blood Gulch Rap

Featuring Pvt. Lavernius Tucker, AKA Doctor Fuck

(-P-)

My name is Private Tucker

And I'm one sexy motherfucker

And (assuming you find our canyon)

I'll be your very favorite lover

(-P-)

How many women did I bang?

How many hearts have I made pang?

Let's just say, compared to me

Your love-life's circling the drain!

(-P-)

Now here's one question for the ages

My little black book's got 10,000 pages

And if I had my way, I'd put every other man

In the world in steel-bar cages

(-P-)

How many women did I bang?

How many hearts have I made pang?

Let's just say, compared to me

You're love-life's circling the drain!

(-P-)

For your dumbass argument's sake

Let's say my claims are all fucking fake

But then just go ask Grif's smokin' sister

And she'll tell you I never took a break!

(-P-)

How many women did I bang?

How many hearts have I made pang?

Let's just say, compared to me

You're love-life's circling the drain!


A/N: Yeah, I did NOT mean to write another of these, but this comes from needing to alleviate the mind-numbing tedium of summer school and consciously realizing that "Tucker" rhymes quite well with "Fucker". Again, this is for Gumby 1011 of The Freelancer Collaboration.

ADDENDUM: Sorry for the (-P-)'s that I now apparently have to use to indicate a blank line, but FFN's formatting is being a little bitch.