Author's Note- I rewatched the Lit scenes from Let Me Hear Your Balalaikas Ring Out about twelve times last week. That's where the inspiration for this came from. It will be longer than The Crying Game, but I have only written the first three chapters. So... you can expect regular updates at least that long. After that... well, we'll see, won't we?

Now, let's take a look at Balalaikas... sans Jess.


1. Breaking

"I thought you said forever
Over and over
These sleepless nights become
Bitter oblivion."

-Anberlin


Rory paused as she stepped out of the front door, hesitating on the gravel drive. She really didn't want to eat by herself in the house, with the maid making obsequies at her elbow all night, and she certainly had no inclination to follow her grandmother to the bridge game, despite the invitation that had been issued. What she really wanted was a nice, quiet dinner with Logan (not that there would be a likely chance of that happening, even if he had been home).

At that moment, though, a familiar silver Porsche careened into the driveway.

"Hop in, Ace!" her boyfriend called through the window. "You and me are going out on the town!"

She sighed inwardly. That was all they ever did- go out on the town- with or without his mates, and it was grating on her. Outwardly, though, she only said, "Logan, you're home! I thought you were gone until tomorrow."

He climbed out of the car and smiled tiredly at her. "Yeah, well, thought I'd surprise you, Ace."

"I'm definitely surprised," she replied.

"So come on," he said, waving a hand at the car. "Let's go somewhere."

Rory bit her lip. She wanted to spend time with Logan, but she also wanted to stay in tonight. Saying that was bound to start something, because god forbid Logan Huntzberger should do anything that wouldn't live up to his playboy reputation, but relationships were about compromises. She'd made plenty. It was time for him to hold up his end.

"Actually, I was thinking maybe we could stay in tonight," she said shyly.

He looked at her, wearing her coat and dressed to go out, and raised an eyebrow skeptically. "Looks like you're ready to leave, to me," he said.

She shook her head. "That was before I knew you'd be getting home tonight."

"Yeah, well, I'm the one who's had to spend a whole day in Omaha," he said mulishly. "I just want to go out and get drunk as all hell."

Rory sighed. "You did that last night!" she exclaimed, fed up and really not in the mood for Logan's childishness. "Can't you just... take a break? I'm sure your liver would thank you!"

"Where's this coming from?" he demanded, sounding irritable and surprised at her resistance. "You love coming out with me and the guys most nights!"

"No, I really don't," she said. Didn't he know her at all?

"You never said anything before."

Rory resisted the urge to stamp her feet- as infuriating as Logan's density was, that was really childish. "Yeah, because I didn't want to make a scene!" she exclaimed. "I knew you would react like this."

"Like what?" he asked, stepping closer to her. "What am I acting like?"

"Like a spoiled little jerk who has to have his way!"

"Hey, whoa whoa whoa whoa!" Logan exclaimed. "Don't turn this around on me! When I ask you out, you can say no. I get that you're upset because you're on the outs with your mom, but don't take it out on me 'cause you can't work up the guts to go talk to the bitch!"

Rory saw red. "Don't you dare talk about my mom!" she screamed.

"Yeah, well, that's a little hypocritical, don't you think, Ror?" he asked, in a demeaning tone one might use on a very small, slow child. She registered his use of her mother's nickname for her and it only served to infuriate her further. Only two people- two people who had once and did mean the world to her- called her 'Ror.' No one else was allowed to. "You didn't seem to have any problems bad-mouthing my mother at the first opportunity!"

"Because she was being awful to you that night!"

"I didn't make you say those things!" he yelled. Then he stopped, apparently taking stock of his tone. With a sigh, he said, "Come on, let's just go."

She shook her head. "No," she said firmly. "I told you, I don't want to go out."

Logan looked at her for what felt like a very long time. "Then I guess that's it," he said, and the finality in his tone told her he wasn't just talking about drinks. "We're done."

Rory gasped. "What? Just like that? Go get drunk with me or we're breaking up?"

He shook his head. "No, it's... not that, you know? It's this- the drama. I don't want to be standing here, screaming at you in your grandparents' driveway. I can't take it. I thought it would be fun, I could be your boyfriend, but it's just too much drama."

"If you can't take the drama, you shouldn't be in a relationship," Rory said, trying desperately to stop the tears that were prickling at the back of her eyes from spilling over.

"Well, that's good then," he said. "'Cause I'm not."

He got in his car, slammed the door, and drove away.


The next day...


"Rory?" The knock on her bedroom door sounded for the third time. "Rory, open up." Another few seconds passed in silence, and Rory thought for a brief, hopeful moment, that her grandmother had gotten the hint and gone away.

No such luck. The door swung open and Emily entered the little room. Immediately, her concerned expression changed to one of shock. "Rory, you're still in your pajamas!" she exclaimed. "We have to be at the Ogilvie Center for the Russian tea in less than half an hour!"

Sitting up and running a hand through her mussed hair, Rory replied, "I know. I'm not going."

Emily stared at her incredulously. "What do you mean you're not going? Of course you're going!" she snapped.

"No, I'm not."

"Lorelai Leigh Gilmore, do not take that insolent tone with me, you sound just like your mother!" Emily growled. "This tea is the most important function of the season, and you will not miss it."

"No."

"Well, I never! What's gotten into you?"

Rory flopped back on the bed. "I've just had the worst couple of days and I just... I can't, Grandma."

Emily narrowed her eyes at her. "Rory, we are Gilmores. We do not simply bow out of functions because we've had a "bad day." You will get up off that bed, you will get dressed and do your hair, and you will meet me at the Ogilvie Center in thirty minutes or there will be consequences."

It was just too much. All her anguish over losing the relationship with her mother she'd cherished... all her pain over Logan's out-of-the-blue breakup... it all came rushing up to compound her irritation. She jumped to her feet. "Don't speak to me like I'm a child!" she said in raised tones.

"If you don't want to be treated like a child, you would do well not to act like one!"

Rory narrowed her eyes. "I finally understand why Mom hates you!" she half-yelled. "I'm not her, okay? I can't be your replacement daughter. I can't be Perfect Little Rory anymore! I'm not good enough and I'm never going to be, so just get off my case!"

"If you're going to live in this house, you will follow our rules," Emily said dangerously.

"Well then, maybe I won't live in this house anymore," Rory said quietly. She closed the door in Emily's face. Five minutes later, she walked out of the bedroom dressed in jeans and and a sweater, with her purse in her hand and a coat over her arm. "I'm leaving," she said. And she walked down the stairs, through the hall, and out the front door.

***

Rory sank down on the front steps and buried her face in her hands. Had she really just done that? It had been necessary, she knew. She had been suffocating in there, being turned into a surrogate Lorelai to replace the one they'd never managed to rein in, but now what?

She couldn't go home. She just couldn't face her mother after everything that had happened. She didn't know if she'd be able to take seeing the look of disappointment, the judgment in Lorelai's eyes. But if she couldn't go home, where could she go?


A/N2- This chapter is the shakiest one of the whole story, I promise. I'm just not good at writing the fighting and the screaming. Which is probably bad, because I love the dramatic, angsty stuff. The next chapter will be posted on Tuesday.