Disclaimer: I do not own Inuyasha.
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Abi sighed as she sat beside her roommate and closest friend, Kagura.
"What's your problem?"
"Hiten's being an ass…" She joined her in watching TV.
"Fuck Hiten, try dating Bankotsu."
"Did you know he forgot today was a two year anniversary?" Abi asked in disbelief.
"Psh, it's a man's job to forget that shit." Kagura shrugged.
"So…I shouldn't be angry?"
"No, be angry. Rip his fucking balls of angry, burn it in his memory." She smirked.
"I've tried…I brought it up three times last week."
"What an idiot…you know, Bankotsu forgot Valentine's Day?" Kagura snickered.
"How can you forget that?" Abi asked in disbelief.
"Ask him…he ran to freaking Wal Mart to get a card and found nothing so he fucking made one with crayons." She laughed.
"Oh wow…what did he saw was his gift?"
"He said he was a gift in himself." They both busted out in laughter.
"That sounds like something Hiten would say."
"Oh, and Bankotsu has this new thing, guess what it is?"
"What?" Abi asked excitedly.
"He is in fucking love with chick flicks!"
"Hah, I hate them!" Abi laughed.
"Me, too."
"You know Hiten likes Titanic?"
"No." Kagura said in disbelief.
"He almost cries every time Jack dies." Abi added.
"Oh my fucking god…ok, try to picture this…I was pissed at Banks one time, so to make me laugh he wore a pink speedo!" Kagura bit her bottom lip. Abi tried to hold back her laughter.
"He seems like the kind of guy that would do that anyway." Abi laughed.
"You should see him drunk."
"Ok, Hiten sings fucking teen pop when he's drunk." Abi challenged.
"Bankotsu sings Barbie Girl when he's not." Kagura retorted.
"Oh…that's hard to beat…ok, Hiten stole my fucking diamond studs for himself."
"Hm…Bankotsu stole my panties as souvenirs." Kagura smiled.
"Alright…ouch…Hiten can't have more than three shots of tequila or he's out."
"Pf, little bitch um…Bankotsu was a virgin before I met him."
"No."
"Yup, and if he wasn't…he was really bad." She shuddered.
"Hiten's the same…he thinks he can take complete control." Abi rolled her eyes.
"Mhm…Bankotsu cried when his goldfish died!" Kagura started comparing again.
"Hiten cried when Souten cut his hair once."
"Bankotsu's goldfish was named Spike…he talked to the fucking thing everyday." Kagura said in a dry tone.
"They're just two babies."
"Tell me about it." Kagura rolled her eyes. "You know Bankotsu tried to make a sex tape with me?"
"Ick.." Abi scrunched his nose.
"Without telling me." She added and Abi snickered.
"Ok, when Hiten was drunk, Souten got him in a dress."
"No fucking way."
"I have a picture." She dug through her purse. A passed out Hiten in a pink dress. Kagura almost died laughing.
"Ok…Bankotsu can't cook."
"Hiten doesn't know how to make fucking instant meals."
"Bankotsu doesn't know how to turn on the stove."
"He is fucking obsessed with his hair!" Abi yelled.
"Ugh, I know what you mean! He spends like twenty minutes every day on it!" Kagura groaned.
"Hiten spends a half hour at least!"
"And he winks at himself in the mirror." Kagura added.
"I swear I saw Hiten checking himself out!" Abi growled.
"Bankotsu watches cartoons every Saturday morning." Kagura whispered.
"You'll never guess Hiten's secret obsession…"
"Sponge Bob." They said in unison and busted out laughing again.
"Bankotsu has like ten pairs of Sponge Bob draws." Kagura snickered.
"Hiten has nothing because he won't admit he's in love with it. He watches it for 'Souten'."
"Lying ass sponge lover…I hate that show." Kagura twisted her face in disgust.
"Ugh me too…he's always fucking ready."
"I'm ready to shove a gun so far up his fucking ass…" Kagura stopped when she saw Abi staring blankly at her. "Sorry…"
"Kagura…we're so intelligent and classy…remind me why we date them." Abi sighed and sipped her tea.
"They're nothing without us." Kagura rolled her eyes.
"True…" She sighed. They heard bumps and thuds in the hallway. "Speak of the devils." The door sung open.
"I am so sorry!" Hiten jumped over Kagura and handed Abi a small box. She smiled and opened it. Then sighed.
"My diamond studs…how sweet." She rolled her eyes and kissed his cheeks.
"Yeah…I try." He shrugged.
"And why are you here?" Kagura glanced at Bankotsu.
"I just missed you, baby!" He jumped in her lap.
"Can't….breathe…" She smiled as he crawled so his ass rested beside her and his legs rested on her lap.
"I love you." Hiten kissed her neck.
"Yeah, yeah, I forgive you."
"So…what were you ladies talking about in our absence?" Bankotsu smiled.
Abi and Kagura glanced at each other and Hiten and Bankotsu watched, confused, as their girlfriends bust out in laughter.
"It was nothing." Abi wiped a tear from her eye.
"Nothing at all." Kagura smiled.
