Title: What Ever happened to Voldy's Nose?

Disclaimer: I don't own Harry Potter, duh.

Wormtail was laying in the graveyard, waiting for his master to return to him. He was going to be rewarded for his good job, hopefully with a brand new arm! Then, out of the giant cauldron, came the Dark Lord's bony figure. Wormtail kneeled, ready to take any orders, then stopped, staring up at Voldemort's face. Voldemort looked confused and subconsciously touched his face.

"What, Wormtail? WHAT?" he screamed, nervous that something had gone wrong with the spell.

"Oh, sorry, my Lord. Well, what happened to your nose?" he asked, curiously, still staring at where his master's nose should be.

"What do you mean? I don't..."

"Oh! Did you lose it, sir? I'll help you find it! Don't worry, master!" Wormtail fell to the floor and began feeling around for anything that may be his master's nose. Voldemort just seemed tired, as though this was a dumb joke that's been used one too many times.

"Wormtail, my nose has been gone for a long while, now. Why have you just noticed?" he asked, exasperated.

"Well, my lord, you didn't have arms or legs when you were that little baby thing either. I just figured that your nose'd grow back same as your arms and legs." He replied, not looking up from his search. Voldemort sighed.

"Wormtail, look here. When the Potter boy rebounded my Avada Kedavra, the curse hit me right in the nose and pushed it back into my skull. That left me with just these slits for a nose." He explained to a gaping Wormtail. To Voldemort's surprise, Wormtail went right back to searching on the ground, muttering about not being an idiot and how he's not going to fall for that.

Voldemort didn't get a chance to yell at Wormtail, though, because someone else felt it necessary to comment on this. Both master and servant had forgotten that Harry was even there. So, it came a bit startling when Harry made his feelings on the subject clear.

"OHMYGOD! VOLDEMORT'S GOT NO BLOODY NOSE! I SHOVED VOLDEMORT'S NOSE BACK INTO HIS SKULL! BLOODY HELL!" he screamed, obviously quite shocked.

"Merlin's Beard! Calm down, Harry! I just got reborn and now I have a bloody headache!" he complained.

"Well, that's certainly a story to tell the grandkids, eh? I got rid of Voldy's nose. Wow. That is really just… wow." Harry said, smiling a bit despite his initial shock.

" Yes, yes, we all realize that I have no nose, now—wait, what? Voldy? Can't you just call me You-Know-Who like EVERYBODY ELSE?!" Voldemort screamed. He was about to continue, but Wormtail returned from his search holding up a rather large snail and looking extremely proud of himself.

"I found your nose, Voldy!" he yelled. Voldemort just groaned.


Hehe, I know it's short and pretty dumb, but I like it!