Title: Burn Author: Radiogirl Rating: T (Just to be safe)

Credit: I own none of the characters from the Gilmore Girls series. This story, however, is mine, as well as any characters that I create along the way that are not originally from the show.

Summary: He took her away on that dark night, and she lost herself in him. Slowly, Rory knows she must fight to figure out who she is amongst the torrent of emotions that he brings to her. What she doesn't yet know is that her future is not what it may seem.

(Note: This chapter was revised on 2/5/02)


The stars hung low in the dark, suffocating night. I kept my eyes fixed upward, watching them blur with the tears that slowly filled my eyes as I lay next to you. The night was cold; I could feel it wrapping around me and slowly seeping through my thin jacket. I hadn't anticipated the cold; I hadn't anticipated leaving for this long. I hadn't anticipated leaving with you.

I heard you take a breath as we lay together on the hood of the car, staring up at the bright stars. I heard the flick of a lighter and watched as the smoke slowly filtered above us, blocking the stars from my view.

I turned my head to look at you, the tip of your cigarette glowing in the dark night sky. Your eyes were closed, your lips moving in silent, unspoken words, like a poem that you would not let me hear. I watched your chest rise and fall, another drag on a cheap cigarette.

You sensed my gaze and turned your head, our eyes connecting. You held the cigarette out toward me and I took it, letting the smoke fill my lungs as I stared at you. You looked at me and you saw the old me. Someone you knew with such certainty that you needed. I looked at myself and could only see the changes I'd made for you. Someone who tried so hard to find the same certainty as you.

You saw my body shiver in the night and you pushed yourself up with your elbows, pulling off your jacket and laying it over me, falling back on the hood of the car. I took a deep breath, pulling the jacket up to my nose and inhaling your scent. It was a scent I'd dreamt of so many nights after you'd gone away.

You took one last drag, throwing the dying cigarette to the dirt as you looked back up at the night. As we lay in silence, I could hear the cars on a road far from where we were, people moving from place to place, time moving forward as I lay stuck with you on that dark night. A song hummed out from the radio, only lightly breaking through the cracked window. That song.

"What am I doing here?" I asked, my voice slicing through our silence.

You turned your head back toward me, your eyes never faltering as you stared at me. "You know," you said, the confidence still in your voice as it was that night that seemed so long ago. "You know."

You look at me and you see Rory Gilmore, I look at me and I see you.


He'd shown up without a word. Days and days had passed, and I'd been alone. But now he stood in front of me- vivid, real. I looked at him, his eyes flared with emotion as he begged me to leave with him.

"Where exactly are we supposed to go, Jess?" I asked, my voice rising with every word as I stared at him standing across from me. My heart beat rapidly as I waited for him to speak.

"I want to be with you but... not here. Not this place. Not Stars Hollow. We have to start new." He said, urgency peaking through his words.

"There's nothing to start!"

"You're packed! Your stuff is all in boxes; It's perfect! You're ready, and I'm ready. I'm ready for this; you can count on me now. I know you couldn't before but you can now; you can."

"Look, you know we're supposed to be together. I knew it the first time I saw you two years ago, and you know it too. I know you do." Jess said, his voice lowering slightly, thick with despair that I had never heard before.

"No," I said, shaking my head and looking away. "No, no, no..." My voice trailed off as the tears slowly fell from the corners of my eyes.

"Don't say 'no' just to make me stop talking or to make me go away. Only say no if you don't want to be with me." He said quickly.

I slowly lifted my head, staring into his eyes. As I looked at him, for the first time I saw something that I'd never seen before. Our eyes slowly held each other as I stared into his deep eyes, feeling the sadness inside of him as I'd never felt before. I looked at him, and I saw the love that he would never give me before. It poured from his eyes, enveloping the room and wrapping around me as we stood staring at each other, not saying a word.

"Please Rory," he finally said, his voice cracking with the weight of his words. "Please, just come with me. Please."

The silence hung heavily around us as he stood, waiting to hear me say no again. Waiting for me to reject him.

"Okay," I whispered, one last tear sliding down off of my chin. "Yes."

Quickly I turned, walking into my dorm room and turning on the light, pulling my duffel bag out from under my bed. I turned to my dresser, pulling clothes out as quickly as I could, trying to drown out the voices in my head that were screaming at me to stop. I heard him in the doorway, silently watching me as I ran quickly around the room, my hands flying from my dresser to the duffel bag. He hadn't said a word. He hadn't expected me to agree.

I was done within minutes, and before I could comprehend I found myself facing him in the doorway, my duffel bag slung over my shoulder and my eyes looking straight into his.

"Okay?" He asked, his face rising in question.

"Okay," I said again, turning off the light beside me.

He grabbed my hand and we ran out of the dorm, down the hallway and out into the night. We reached his car and he stopped abruptly, turning toward me. He placed his hand on the back of my neck, pulling my face toward his and catching my mouth with his. My body fell into his as we stood in the silent night, feeling the lips that we never thought we would feel again; the familiarity we'd thought we lost. He pulled away, looking straight into my eyes. "I love you," he said. His voice was different now. No longer was he merely speaking words. He was giving me the promise that I'd wanted so many months before. I did not need to say the words for him to know that I loved him too.

Together we drove off into the night, leaving life behind us. I didn't think about the things I was leaving as we drove away. I didn't think about Dean, or Yale, or even about my mother. I merely looked at him, his eyes fixed on the road as he drove. I watched Jess on that night as he drove and I fell, I fell mercilessly into him.