A//N; here I am again... This one is a little, emotional thingy I put together today... I have recently experienced a personal loss so maybe you'll think it's too sentimental... Please, just read it anyway. All critizism equals good critizism! R&R
"What the hell were you thinking, Rikku?" Gippal took a deep breath, ignoring the tears rolling down his face.
"Why didn't you tell me?" She smiled weakly up on him. It was close now she could feel it. They were running out of time...
"Because I didn't want to, hun." She caressed his wet chin with her hand.
"Why?" he whispered. "You're my wife. I had the right to know..."
"If I'd told you, you had been differrent. You wouldn't see me as Rikku anymore. You'd only see the decease that caught me."
"But you're only twentysix!" He tightened his grip around her waist as they lie on the bed. "There's so much left for you to see, places for us to go to!"
"I have lived my life to the fullest, Gippal." A tear rolled down her face, but she kept on smiling. "I got you, and two wonderful boys. That's all I ever needed."
"What about what I need?" Furiously, he buried his fist the pillow. "I can't live without you, Rikku. I can't..."
"Don't be so stupid, Gippal!" She pressed a kiss on his forehead. "You have to. You have to raise the boys. You have to watch them grow into strong, honourful men, just like their father."
"But..."
"No but-s! If you don't, I swear I'll come back to haunt you as the next "Shuyin"... And that won't be pretty."
"I don't care what you come back as, as long as you come back!"
"No, Gippal. You don't mean that."
"Yes, I DO!!" He screamed now. Taking his pain out on her. She didn't even flinch. She had always known that this day would come. She had decided to keep it to herself, and now she took the consequences. He had every right in the world to yell at her. She didn't regret anything.
"Gippal..." Her face fell. Voice saddened. She immedietly got his full attention. She hated luring him this way, but she couldn't let him destroy his own life because of her.
"Gippal... I need you to promise me one last thing."
"Anything. I'll do anything you want, I promise." He studied her face closely. He saw the tired bags under her eyes. She was pale under her taned, golden skin. But she was still beautiful. Nothing could change that.
"Live your life to the fullest. Go to all the places we talked about. Experience all the adventures we planned. Do all the things I didn't get to do. And when your time has come, I will be waiting."
"No. Not without you!"
"You promised me!" He closed his eye. Realizing what he'd just done. She could see he'd given in.
The curtain door moved and Teylan stuck in his head. She watched her seven year old intensely. She knew it was the last time she'd see him and she wanted to memorize everything about him. He was her oldest. Long for his age and of average weight. His messy hair had the same blonde shade as his father, but the swirls in his emerald eyes were identical to her's. He had a scar across his lip. A couple of years ago, he'd found her claws in the bottom drawer in her closet. Thankfully, she had gotten there in time to prevent him from doing something that could really hurt him. She laughed silently. He was just like her. Always getting himself into trouble. She was sure he would turn Gippals hair grey before he'd reach the age of thirtyfive.
"Come in here, kiddos!" She new Lozan, Teylan's two years younger brother, wasn't far away. He adored Teylan and always followed him around.
Lozan peeked forth behind Teylans back as they slowly walked up to the bed. Normally, they would be running forward to jump onto it and start screaming to wake their parents up. But this time wasn't normal, they could sense the tensions in the air.
Carefully, they crawled onto the bed, taking place on each side of their mom and dad. Lozan crawled over his dad to lay himself down in between them. Gippal still had his eye shut. Not wanting the kids to see the pain in his eye.
"Mommie, you sick?" Rikku could see the worries in Lozan's face. Quickly, she pulled him close with one arm, reaching for Teylan with the other. She embraced them tightly.
"Mum's just really tired and soon I'm going to sleep for a very long time." Teylan looked up to her face.
"But you're never tired mum! You're always happy..."
"I'm happy, honey. But everyone needs to sleep..." The silence took over. It was getting harder to speak. Gippal noticed her failing voice and opened his eye, fearing the worst. But she smiled at him and took a new breath. It was time to say goodbye.
"Teylan." The boy tugged closer to her. "Promise me to take care of your little brother. And I wan't you to make sure that your vydran eats properly, hire a chef if you have to. Just don't let let him get near the kitchen area." She kissed his forehead before turning to Lozan. He was a little wizkid. He reminded her so much of Shinra. But he had his father's way of thinking. Always practical, but he never hid his thoughts on anything. If it was something he didn't like, he said it right out. This was her little boy. He had her way of handling machina. He built his first one when he was three.
"And you, kiddo." He gripped one of her braids, a way of showing her that he was listening. "Keep it goin' with the machina building." She smiled to herself. "Maybe you could build a housekeeper one day, cause with only you boys here, it will look like a pigsty! And charm your father into getting a larger amount of Saturday candy. You have to eat for me to now." She felt him nodding against her chest.
"And both of you, make sure to tease your uncle Tidus, take every chance you get. And don't let your father rest for a second. He's used to have me around being a handful. You have to work twice as hard to drive him crazy."
Gippal glared at her for talking the boys into make trouble. But he didn't want her to stop. As long as she was talking, she was alive. She was looking at him now. The boys had fallen asleep in her arms. There was something new in her eyes. The pain that she never showed him all these years, that she never showed anyone. Her eyelids started to flicker and she felt her body numben. She couldn't feel her legs anymore. But she wasn't finished talking yet. She forced herself to concentrate on his face, using the little strength she had left.
"I love you, Gippal. Always have...always will..." She took one last breath and closed her eyes. "Remember your promise..."
She was gone.
"Rikku? Rikku!" He started to cry again.
ooOoo
Outside their tent stood six of her closest friends in shock. They had heard every word and nowone had a dry eye. Tidus took Yunas hand and quietly led her inside the tent. They picked up the boys and carried their sleeping bodies over to their own tent. Gippal never noticed them. They left him to grieve his wife alone.
Only the boys slept that night. All the others lied in their beds, trying to ignore the heartbreaking cries from a man that couldn't persuade his love to come back to life.
Nowone was home. It was an empty house. And in that empty house stood an empty wall. But no, it wasn't entirely empty. There was a picture, a young woman standing on the deck of a red airship. It was a simple picture, but it was special. It was the only one in the entire house. The woman seemed special to. Her hair was done in several braids and kept together with a blue hairband. She wore a bikini top and a short kaki skirt. Even if the picture was worn and tattered, the woman glowed of an unending force of energy. She had a smile on her lips that told all spectators that she was living life with an unusual happiness.
Out in the hall, the doorknob turned and opened. Teylan stepped in to make sure that nowone was home before he turned to the door again.
"It's clear. He's not home..." A shy girl slowly stepped inside, her eyes confused.
"I don't understand, Teylan. Why are we sneaking like this?" He turned his back on her. He didn't want to talk about it, but he knew he had to explain.
"I know you've already met my father and that you got along and all, but this is different. He doesn't appreciate having women running in the house." He wasn't one to talk much. He had never told her anything of his past or his personal life. Shaylee didn't even know about... He stopped himself before his thoughts went astray. She was still confused, but she seemed happy that he took this risk for her. She had never been to the house before. Teylan took her hand and led her upstairs. They walked through the corridor.
"Wait." Shaylee suddenly stopped. She was staring at the wall. Teylan followed her gaze but looked away quickly.
"Who's she?"
"Who?"
"The girl on the picture..." He took a deep breath.
"My mom..."
"She's pretty."
"Yeah..." He almost whispered.
"Where is she now?" Shaylee looked around her. Teylan closed his eyes.
"She's dead." Her eyes widened with shock. She took his hand again and pressed it firmly.
"What happened?"
"Cancer."
"Oh... I'm sorry..."
"Yeah. Me to..." He turned away from the picture and dragged her towards his room. That was the only picture in the entire house and he hated it. He knew the others did to. They didn't want to be reminded of their loss. Not even after twenty years without her. Many times, they were close to taking it down, but nowone could bring himself to actually do it. So it stayed.
ooOoo
Lozan sat on the backyard of Djose temple. He was working on a machina-housekeeper that he'd built many years ago. It had a breakdown earlier that day. He felt a chill down his spine. If his father found out that it broke on the twentieth year of his mom's death, he would flip. Lozan himself didn't have many memories of his mother. He remembered that she was beautiful and funny and kind. He remembered how safe he felt when she held him in her arms, and he would play with her long braids.
In a way, he was glad he didn't remember much more than that. For twenty years, he had seen his father consume himself, dwelling in her memory. Never letting go.
He WAS a good dad, but at any moment, he got lost in himself. No doubt thinking of her.
ooOoo
Gippal was standing outside the farplane. He was exhausted.
"I'm not used to travelling like this anymore." He muttered to himself. Maybe he would have to send for an airship later. He was fourtyseven. That wasn't considered youth anymore.
But he had to come. It was twenty years to the day and he didn't want to wait any longer. He stepped through the gate.
ooOoo
"He's here..." She turned around to face her old mentor and friend, his red cape flowing in a wind that didn't exist. She smiled.
"I know. I can feel him calling." She closed her eyes, transporting herself to the man who wanted to see her so desperately.
There he was. The years had been kind to him. He hadn't changed much. His Al Bhed hair had grey highlights and he had wrinkles in his face that gave him even more carachter than he needed. She knew that women still gasped over him. She smiled towards him. Not that overly energetic grin she used most of the time. It was genuine. And it was only meant for him.
ooOoo
"Rikku..." He whispered under his breath. He had waited so long to see her. Twenty years to be exact. But when he saw her standing there, he didn't know what to say.
She was so beautiful. Beautiful from the inside and out, and she smiled at him, that breathtaking smile that belonged to him and nowone else. He couldn't stop the tears from falling.
"Come back, Rikku... I can't take this anymore..." Rage started to pound inside him and he straightened up. He took a deep breath and let the pain pour.
"I DID EVERYTHING YOU WANTED ME TO! I'VE RAISED OUR SONS, I'VE BEEN AROUND THE WORLD... WHAT MORE DO YOU WANT? TELL ME, RIKKU! TELL ME! CAUSE I CAN'T TAKE IT ANYMORE!" He screamed from the top of his lungs. She didn't even flinch. But how could she, really? She was just a bunch of pyreflies...
He turned around and started walking, stopping suddenly when he heard a voice in his head. "You haven't lived yet, dummie! And you don't step your foot here again before you do, Gip!" He sighed and continued walking.
ooOoo
As soon as he disappeared from her sight, she returned to Auron. A smile played at the corner of his mouth.
"He sounded a little mad." She giggled at his comment.
"A little?"
"Sure he won't be back to see you?"
Rikku sighed, nodding her head.
"No matter how much I miss him, it's not his time yet." He just nodded, picking up his bottle of sake for a swig.
ooOoo
At the same moment, a machina sparkled to life again behind the big temple of Djose...
"He's getting old..."
Teylan passed the beer over to his brother. They sat on the porch, watching their seventhy-year old father strolling along the ocean. It was a warm night, peaceful.
"Yeah..."
Lozan didn't mention that Housekeep' was starting to shut down again. He was sure that his brother already had noticed that fact. And that he knew what it meant.
Teylan inhaled the fresh air from the ocean. He did know what was going on.
"He's been waiting a long time. Mum's sure been putting him on a hold."
"Guess she had her reasons..."
"Yeah. They'll have a lot to talk about when they reunite."
They both thought about their own kids. How they would miss their grandpa. The kids were in their twenties but they loved their grandfather deeply. Teylan had already talked to them about what was to happen. He wanted to prepare them as much as possible. The way that his mother had disappeared from his life had hurt, but he understood that she wanted to spare them a life lived in fear of the future. His mind flew to the picture on the wall upstairs. It wasn't the only one any longer.
ooOoo
One day, their father had come home and rushed up to the attic. Slightly worried, they had followed him there. They found him going through an old box, looking for something.
"Vydran, what are you doing?"
"It's time for me to live, boys..." With that he stood up and leaved. Teylan and Lozan were quick to follow. Vydran stopped by the hated wall. "Help me get some pictures up on this darn wall!"
ooOoo
That day had worked like some sort of therapy for all of them. The picture of their mom still had the place of honour on the wall, but it was sorrounded by a ton of pictures showing family members and places they had visited on their many trips around the world.
ooOoo
Gippal turned back to the house. He to knew it was time. Finally. He walked past his sons. There was no need for taking goodbye. Rikku had given them a lifetime to do so. And for once, he was thankful.
He saw her watching the ocean. For the first time in over fourty years, he was really able to see her, to touch her, to kiss her. He stopped for a moment. His whole body tickled. When he looked down at his hands, he could see them change. In the split of a second, he lost fourty-three years of age.
"Of course..." he mumbled. "A husband fourty-four years her senior would probably raise some questions." He smiled and continued towards her.
She sensed his presence and turned around to face him, a wide grin across her face.
"What took ya so long, buddie?"He laughed loudly, sweeping her up into his arms.
"I had a promise to keep, Cid's girl. Couldn't go until I fixed it..." He watched her eyes grow serious, before smiling that special smile, looking him deep into his eye.
"I always loved you, Gippal. Even though I could feel you were doubting that sometimes."
"I never stopped loving you, princess. Even though I indeed doubted that sometimes..." He leaned forward, kissing her, as desperately as drowning man needs oxygen. And she was his oxygen. Always...
The end...
