One fine day in Albania, Voldemort was sitting in his mansion wearing a No Fear tee shirt and Tommy Hilfigure jeans.  He was playing the new hit game, Tourture-Da-Muggle. (Get yours at Knockturn Alley! Fun for the whole family!) All of a sudden, an alarm went off. "Is that my trifle? No, it's the Harry Potter alarm. He must be vulnerable!"

3,000 miles away, Harry Potter had slipped on a banana peel that had been discarded so carelessly by Dudley and fractured his wand arm.

Back in Albania, Voldemort went to the fireplace, threw some powder into it and called his trusty servant Lucius Malfoy.

 Mr. Malfoy stepped out of the fireplace and said "You called, oh mighty Master?"

Voldemort replied, "Harry Potter is injured and is unable to fight. To the Voldie-cave, Malfoy!"  Voldemort whirled around and stormed into the secret passage that led to the Voldie-cave. Malfoy followed quickly.

Once there, Voldemort quickly changed into his purple robes and pink cape. Malfoy changed into his tight black jumpsuit that was decorated with re and yellow flames. Once they were done primping themselves, they mounted their H-Zero-M-Zero brooms and took off to find Harry Potter.

Harry Potter looked up as he heard the sound of Voldemort and Malfoy coming closer (don't ask me what that sounds like). He winced as the pair crashed into the roof of Four Privet Drive and through both stories. After a quick but furious battle with an angry Petunia and a soapy frying pan (they had gotten roof tiles on her clean carpet) they stumbled out of the front door with their wands out in front of them. "Ah-ha! There is Harry Potter! We shall kill him now!" Voldemort said as Harry screamed his head off. He raised his want to kill Harry when all of a sudden he stopped. "What's wrong, boss?" Malfoy said as he dusted off his jumpsuit. "I forgot the curse," Voldie stated, scratching his head with his wand, accidentally turning his scalp orange. "Oh yeah! AVADA-" but he couldn't finish the curse, on account of the huge bus that was sitting on his chest. "Oh my god, you killed Voldie! And Malfoy!" said a voice that was none other than Stan, the dude on the Knight Bus. He then spotted Harry and said "Blimey. We killed the dark lord! Us, not you! That's rich!" He started to laugh uncontrollably, and the Knight Bus drove on.

The End