VOLDEMORT'S P.O.V.
You want to know why am I so f$#ing pissed? Because I'm sick of looking like a hippo's smooth ass! But I know why I'm like this. I remember as if it was yesterday. My father had come back to me. He had taken me back to his house. He was making me breakfast. I had said I wanted waffles, but he was making pancakes. So I asked politely if I could have waffles; he turned around and whacked me in the face with the frying pan that had bacon grease in it; the grease spilled on my face and burned my skin off. And don't get me started on my nose. One day, for no particular reason, I was complaining about nose hairs, and you know what my father did? He chopped my freakin' nose off! Now, let's talk about my ears; after the accident with my skin, the bacon grease also burned my hair as well, which is why I'm bald. Anyway, my dad said I needed a haircut, (which is weird, because I don't have hair) so my dad tied me to a chair and went to cut my hair; instead, he accidentally cut off my ears! Wow, that was a mouth full!DUMBLEDORE'S P.O.V.
I never knew all that stuff about Tom. I just thought he was born demented. I thought he got it from his mother's side. She wasn't much of a looker. Guess what? I just got knew socks! They're MADD cool yo! They –
HARRY'S P.O.V
Whoa! Professor Dumbledore, don't ever, EVER say "yo," again! You're not a gangster!
DUMBLEDORE'S P.O.V.
Yo, yo, I'm a gangster! I'm a straight up G! The gangster life is the life for me. Shooting people by day, selling drugs by night, being a gangster is hella tight! I walk around town with a stark erection, then gave your mom a yeast infection! I saw –HARRY'S P.O.V
Whoa, whoa, whoa! Excuse me?!? What'd you say about my mama?!? Oh hell on, yo! What's your problem?! Do you want to take this outside? Huh? Do ya, do ya?
DUMBLEDORE'S P.O.V
Dude, we are outside.
HARRY'S P.O.V
Oh. Well, then, do you want to take this inside so we can take this back outside?DUMBLEDORE'S P.O.V
Yo mama.
HARRY'S P.O.V(About to say something but has been viciously interrupted)
HERMIONE'S P.O.VJust leave it Harry. You shouldn't have retaliated in the first place. If you ask me, you're both acting like a couple of babies.
HARRY'S P.O.V Well…nobody asked you! HERMIONE'S P.O.V I was only trying to help! You don't have to be so rude! RON'S P.O.VHey guys? I have a question. I'm confused about something.
HERMIONE'S P.O.V What is it Ron? RON'S P.O.V What's P.O.V mean? HARRY'S P.O.VThat's actually a good question.
HERMIONE'S P.O.VIt is. A P.O.V stands for someone's "Point Of View."
DUMBLEDORE'S P.O.VReally? Because I always thought it stood for "People On Viagra."
DOBBY'S P.O.VYou know, Dobby actually has a good story about People On Viagra. Does you guys want to hear it?"
HARRY'S P.O.V
Dobby, where did you come from?
DOBBY'S P.O.V
Well sir, on a foggy day, my mother was in a tough labor, Dobby was pushing out of her v –
EVERYONE'S P.O.V
Ok, ok! Just get on with the story!
DOBBY'S P.O.V
One time, Dobby was cleaning out young master Draco's room, when Nr. Malfoy calls me to his sleeping quarters. When Dobby gets there, he sees the weirdest thing; it was Mr. Malfoy, but he was with another guy. He was trying to do something, but the guy's butt was in the way. It was covering his waste. Anyway, he says to me, he says, "Fetchth me the Viagra!" So I get it and –
EVERYONE'S P.O.V
Shut up! That's just disturbing!
Author's Note: I hope you liked this story! I also hope that you didn't find it too disturbing.
