Notes: Characters are not mine, even after all these years. This is mostly a character study, but done in the voice I've always been the most comfortable with, as it were. An excuse to focus almost entirely on my two favorites! Joy! Not very nice to Relena maybe, but not horrible either...
Research
"Well hey there, doll. Never would have pegged you as the type to visit a place like this. Before you ask, Heero is not here at this table, or under it either. You get me?
"Chill, chill. It was just a joke. But if you're lookin for him…
"Eh? You're not? You feelin okay?
"Yes, you were that bad.
"What? Trowa? You're here to talk to me about Trowa? What'd he do? Threaten to kill you or something?
"Okay, okay. Your reasons are your own. What did you want to know?
"Anything, huh? That's a broad topic. Okay, how about this… you can't always predict him. I know he always seems really calm and aloof, but that's exactly why you can never know what he's really planning. And he's really hard to get to know. I mean, ridiculously. You think Heero is bad? Heero at least reacts when you do something he doesn't like. Okay, maybe he overreacts is a better word. With Trowa, you can't tell. It's almost impossible to figure out what he likes, well, save the obvious anyway.
"What is the obvious? He likes keeping busy. You can tell by the way Lady Une forced him, and Heero for that matter, to take up hobbies just so she could get them out of the office. He likes his sister, Quatre, Heero, the lions. He also seems to like reading, and I'm not sure if he likes jogging or just does it to stay in shape. I guess he can't hate it if he's willing to get up at dawn for it.
"Yeah, I did mention hobbies. Oh, hey, yeah. I'll take a shot of Tequila, thanks. Hobbies. He reads a lot. And he helps Quatre out with his charity stuff. I guess that counts as a hobby, in a way. I mean, Q really goes overboard with his charities, as I'm sure you've heard. Not only has he created all those new ones to help people hurt by the war, but he has these weird events. Carnivals and stuff for the kids where all the money raised goes to help orphans or something. He's gotten Trowa and Catherine to perform at quite a few now. It's funny to watch, cause the kids love it, but Trowa's so awkward around them. I don't think he knows how to handle all that enthusiasm, honestly.
"Ugh. You know, it doesn't taste great but that stuff feels good going down. Or, you know, it does after the first shot or so. Anyway, he's currently training for some marathon Q is setting up. Twenty miles or something. Hell, the lanky bastard could probably do it right now with no problems but he insists on prepping for it. Gives him a goal I guess. I think he's talked Heero into signing up too, actually. I flat out refused. No way in Hell!
"Yeah, another shot please. Thanks. And no, I am not out of shape! Do you want me to keep talking or not?
"That's what I thought. Now, be nice. Anyway, I think I really hate the guy, you know? When he goes running with those long legs of his you'd be thinking 'giraffe', right? No, he's graceful. Looks more like a deer or something. Now me, Heero says I scuttle like a cockroach, but I think he's just being an ass.
"Hey! Stop laughing! He's just jealous of my skills at stealth. Did I mention I'm also an expert assassin? Yeah, I thought that might shut you up. Uh. So, one tequila, two tequila, eh? Course, I can go more than three before hitting the floor. No idea why no one seems to respect me for it. Well, I take that back. I think Q does now, but that's only cause I managed to get him wasted. Now there was a good time! He started singing show tunes…
"Right, right. You're here to talk about Trowa. Okay. I think he likes music. I mean, he's always listening to it when he goes running and he can play the flute. It's weird, but he's got this great ear for melody. I've heard him picking them out a tune on a piano at Q's before. He'll sit and listen to a song, then imitate it. Don't get me wrong, he's not a virtuoso or anything, and it takes him some time to get it down, but it's kinda cool to listen to it develop. There was this one time that I came back to Q's and I heard music. It was pretty quiet and I followed it and found them both in Q's music room. Trowa was playing this song that's been recorded a million times over a million years by a million artists- I think it's called 'Hallelujah' or something, and Q is standing with him and singing. It was kinda nice. Sounded pretty good.
"No, no, he wasn't singing too. Trowa cannot sing. I can. He can't.
"Yeah, I have heard it. You might be surprised, but I don't think he worries about embarrassing himself. I just don't think he gets embarrassed. You won't get him singing karaoke in a crowded bar because he's uncomfortable with that much attention, but in a private room with only his friends you can get him up there. Helps to get a few drinks in him first, of course. Otherwise he doesn't find it all that amusing. But when he and Yuy get tipsy, oh man. I still clearly remember them standing there, leaning on each other and singing some archaic 'classic'. It was horrible, cause Heero's nasal and Trowa's flat, but it was hysterical too.
"What do I mean by 'classic'? Trowa listens to some really old crap. He told me once it was because traveling with mercenaries you don't get exposed to new music. You've gotta make due with what they've got. And with all that traveling, the collection gets peculiar.
"Love songs? Yeah, I guess he listens to some love songs. I mean, most songs are about love, aren't they? I guess some of what he listens to are even about the good parts of love. I know there's one song about soul mates that he likes…
"Ha! Are you kidding? Of course he doesn't believe in soul mates! You're talking about Trowa here! The guy only believes in mating compatibility. At least that's how he makes it sound. You can't talk sex wit the guy, at all. He sounds like he's on one of those animal documentaries he watches. Course, I think it's his way of discouraging my questions, but still… if I didn't know for a fact that he wasn't into bestiality, I'd wonder.
"Oh, a bit more than you were ready to hear, eh? Not enough poetry? Trowa may read poetry, but I don't think you can get him to recite it to you!
"Well, yeah, he reads poetry. He reads almost anything he gets his hands on. But I guess he likes it well enough. I hear him discussing it with Quatre, and sometimes even Wufei. I've never really enjoyed poetry myself, and I don't think Heero would understand it unless it was written in binary…
"Huh? Yeah, he gets into discussions. And not just about books either. He's usually a pretty quiet, placid guy, but if he gets going on something he really cares about he gets almost as bad as Wufei.
"What sets him off? Well, obviously he cares about animal rights, and feels strongly about maintaining peace. Those are pretty obvious. But oh man, he will go –off- about the education system if given half a chance. The look on Q's face when he openly objected to one of his opinions, and began on a very heated argument about how he saw it- priceless. And then there's politics. He and Heero will go on for hours about politics, even if they agree, and they usually do. I've heard them both say things I know they don't mean just to keep the argument going.
"Is he happy with the war over? Another shot- please. Thanks. Yeah, I guess he is. I mean, I know he's glad we won! I think that war was the first time he's ever fought for something that really mattered to him. As a mercenary, you fight, win, get paid and then get food. Nothing really to be all that passionate about, eh? Especially when you eat like Trowa. Guy eats almost nothing. It's how he still fits into those size minus twenty jeans.
"No, I don't really know what size he wears. I don't make it a habit of checking. I mean, I could probably find out, ask Q or something…
"Quatre knows because Trowa hates to go shopping for clothes and occasionally Quatre or Catherine will get tired of seeing him in the same threadbare outfit and go shopping for him.
"Yeah, he and Quatre are pretty close.
"Lady, I don't think you and Trowa would be good for each other at all.
"Well, yeah, he's a good guy. He's a really good guy. And I do want him to be happy. It's just, you know… he and Quatre are –really- close, you know?
"I might be implying something like that.
"I resent that. Not all the good ones are gay. I'm not gay.
"What do you mean, 'you rest your case'? Sheesh! See if I help you out again. Didn't even buy me a drink for all my help! ….. Well, at least she's gone."
Duo took another shot and grimaced, then smirked at the reflection he could see in the glass coming up behind him. "You're late."
"Hn." Heero stood at Duo's shoulder, not yet sitting. "I saw Relena here."
"Yeah. You owe me a drink for that. I didn't tell her I was expecting you."
"Oh yeah? I think you owe me a drink."
"Why's that?"
"You gave her the wrong idea about Trowa."
Duo leaned back in his seat. "And there I thought I was being generous in his praise."
"You made her think he's with Quatre."
"Oh, that. You should thank me for that too."
"Why?"
"She wanted you, and she wanted him. Can you imagine what she'd do if she found out you were lovers? We'd see a lot of offers for a threesome, I suspect. And double the stalking."
Heero's lips twitched. "You may be right." Then he tensed up as Relena reentered the bar. Her eyes lit up when she saw him there.
Before he could figure out a method of retreat, Duo reached up, grabbed the front of his shirt and yanked him down for a very awkward, but probably quite passionate looking, kiss.
"Oh… um… thought I… forgot my purse. Guess not." And Relena scampered out again, looking a bit green.
"Ugh. Now you owe me the next two rounds, Yuy."
Heero didn't bother to argue.
