Disclaimer: I own nothing…but heck, I sure wish I did!
A/N This fic is was inspired by the song "Forever and Always" by "Parachute" so if you listen to it first or while you read this, you'll probably see the reference ;) Also…it's sorta my first soo…please let me know what ya'll think : )
Thanks for reading!
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Eyes Already Closed
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Natasha pursed her lips and stopped her pacing just long enough to gaze outside the window, the fog from the early morning obscuring her view a bit.
Tension and worry lined her shoulders, although any normal person wouldn't have been able to tell.
He could have though. He always could. For some reason, while no other person seemed to be able to read her, understand her, he was always able to.
She continued her pacing, pushing back a lock of her red hair behind her ear, just the click-clack of her leather heeled black boots against the cold tile interrupted the silence.
She glanced over to where her phone was on the wooden dining room table, resisting the urge to go over and check and see if he called. She would have heard, though. The volume was on max.
Two weeks.
Two bloody weeks without one word, hint, without anything.
He was supposed to have been back two weeks ago.
The shrill ring that came from her cell phone startled her out of her worried thoughts, and she wasted no time in answering the call, not bothering to check the I.D.
"Natasha." She answered briskly, expecting to hear his voice, or possibly one of his lame jokes.
It was silent on the other end, but then the sound of some shuffling came through, and finally someone answered.
"Na..Natasha?"
She frowned, recognizing the voice as none other than Steve Rogers. Captain America.
It wasn't Hawkeye.
"Yes?" She replied, masking her emotions and schooling her face into that of the Black Widow's even though there was no way for Steve to see.
"Nat…Natasha, something's happened. You…" Steve's voice was thick as he choked on his words. "You should come right now."
Natahsa hadn't even realized what her body was doing until her hands were on the steering wheel to one of the cars Tony Stark had lent her (after her previous one exploded).
She numbly registered the directions Steve gave her.
The Hellecarrier. Med Bay.
Her hands tightened around the wheel, and suddenly she was being lifted via helicopter to the S.H.I.E.L.D's Headquarters, and then she was rushing through the vast expanse of computer consoles bustling people, many of whom knew of her and moved out of her way.
It felt like forever, even though she had travelled these hallways so many times, but now it was like a never ending maze.
She slowed when she saw Thor, who was standing outside one of the doors in the Medbay, leaning against the wall, his hair obscuring his face.
"Thor." Natasha called out to him, hiding her growing panic and walked over to him.
The god of thunder's head jerked up, his blue eyes misty.
"Lady Natasha," the Demigod greeted in a whisper.
In a whisper.
Thor never whispered.
Natasha could feel something start to crack in her, but she clenched her fists and gritted her teeth.
"Where…where is he?" Those three words seemed make everything all the sudden more real. It wasn't just a nightmare she had in her head at night when he wasn't with her.
Thor gazed over to the closed door beside him, his eyes dead serious and sad.
"I must warn you, Lady Natasha-"
She hid her anger, she didn't need to be warned. She was an assassin, trained and raised since she was eight.
"It…it isn't good." Thor placed a comforting hand on her shoulder, giving it a tight squeeze.
She opened the door.
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When Natasha Romanoff had first met Clint Barton after she had accepted his offer to work with S.H.I.E.L.D., the only words she could use to describe him was infuriating. Ridiculous. Annoying. Normally her threats and glares were enough to make someone faint, but they never seemed to faze him.
Well, they did a few times, especially when things got serious.
But it was only as time passed as his, and hers, secrets, the things they kept to themselves that weighed them down, made them feel like they were suffocating in themselves, were shared, and a friendship, bond, a trust like no other was formed.
And suddenly Natasha found herself safe.
That lonely ache in her chest was almost gone, replaced with a warmth she had never known. Healed by someone who had been almost as lost her, an archer with blue eyes sprinkled with grey's and gold's.
And after New York, teaming up with Avengers, Natasha suddenly found herself with allies, more allies than she could have dreamed of (and she knew it was the same for her sharp-eyed partner).
But now they were more than allies, they were friends.
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"If you had a choice, in how you die, I mean, how would you?"
Natasha ducked under his punch and spun around lightly on her feet, trying to sweep his feet out from underneath him.
She didn't comment on his choice of question, after all, both of them had asked each other far stranger things. Instead she continued to spar, although it looked more like a dance, albeit a very deadly one.
"I'm not sure," she murmured. She'd always thought that her end would come when someone got lucky and managed to put a bullet through her cranium. "What about you?"
He back flipped, avoiding her left spin hook kick, and changed from styles Taekwondo to Aikido.
"I think I just want to go in my sleep. Or asleep. Just…with my eyes already closed, I guess."
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Six months after New York, she and Clint sat together on the roof of the Avenger's tower, her head leaning against his shoulder, they talked about it.
The Avengers, S.H.I.E.L.D., life, and lastly them.
"You know, Nat," Clint had said that night as he gazed out over New York, "when we're old and grey, and we've left S.H.I.E.L.D., I'm gonna take you to Virginia."
Natasha raised an eyebrow and couldn't help but smirk. "Virginia?" She asked dryly.
Clint simply looked down at her smiled.
It was a smile that was happy, but there was something else there as well.
So Natasha just turned her eyes back to the New York skyline, and nodded.
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Sometimes they would make up fantasies (well, mostly Clint. Natasha preferred to listen). Fantasies of a different life, different places.
Sometimes they were the ones with superpowers, being able to fly and have super strength.
Other times he simply talked of them getting married, they kids they would have and a good life. They lived on a hill, in a good sized house, and they would always have plumbing problems and he would always try to fix them, but just made them worse. So in the end Natasha fixed the plumbing and he cooked dinner.
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The Doctor was explaining to Natasha what happened, but she could barely hear him, trying to keep her emotions under control.
Eventually the Doctor excused himself, glancing back over his shoulder before he fully exited the room.
"I'm sorry," he said with sad eyes. "I really am."
He left, leaving Tony, Bruce, Thor and Natasha alone in the room with Clint.
Clint, who was on the hospital bed, hardly recognizable with all the tubes and machines trying to keep him alive.
Tony's face was unreadable, but his eyes never left the still figure on the bed. Bruce was leaning against the wall, his worried eyes searching Natasha's face, his shoulders hunched over.
Thor's presence behind her was comforting, but she was only dimly aware of it.
It was completely quiet except the beep-beep from Clint's heart monitor, and for how long they all just sat and stood there lost in their own heads Natasha didn't know.
It was some time later when Steve joined them, he quietly slipped in through the door, gave Natasha a sympathetic look and handed Bruce a cup of water. He sat opposite of Tony on the other side of the bed, placed his elbows on his knees and rested his chin on his hands.
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Half an hour later Pepper joined them, seating herself beside Tony next to the window.
No one spoke.
As time wore on, Natasha could feel that small break becoming cracks.
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"How, how long?" Natasha rasped out, breaking the spell in the room and gaining everyone's attention. "How long was he like this before I came?" She gripped the edge of the bed, her eyes never leaving Clint.
"He was brought in for surgery two hours or so before…you arrived ten minutes after he was brought out." Bruce eventually answered quietly.
Natasha's eyes flashed as she whirled around to face the other occupants in the room.
"Why didn't anyone tell me?" Her eyes held unshed tears.
"None of us knew until a few minutes before you did." Steve answered bitterly. "He was brought immediately into surgery, no one told us."
"Bulls***!" Natasha growled.
"Natasha, calm down," Bruce stepped in, putting his arms in a placating manner.
Natasha's turned on the scientist, and snarled. "Don't give me that. Clint is dying, and all you can tell me is to 'calm down'?" Her body was coiled, ready to pounce.
"Natasha!"
She turned and was met with Tony's cold gaze.
"He was our friend, our teammate too. Don't, don't even think for a second, that we aren't worried as well."
Natasha slowly loosened her grip from the bed as Tony's words sank in and gave a defeated nod, her posture crumpling.
"He is a strong man, Clint Barton." Thor added softly, trying to give a smile, but it turned out more like a grimace. "He will make it through this. I know it."
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Forty-five minutes later, Clinton Francis Barton's heart line went flat.
Thor angrily punched the wall beside him, demolishing it.
Tony swore and buried his face into Pepper's neck as she hugged him while running her fingers through his hair consolingly.
Bruce closed his eyes placed his face in his hands.
Natasha Romanoff rendered ten S.H.E.I.L.D agents unconscious when they tried to lead her out of the room. She eventually collapsed into Steve's arms, sobbing.
And finally, it shattered.
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Hazily, there was a tiny, miniscule part of Natasha Romanoff that was happy.
Because her partner, friend, and so much more died in his sleep.
And just like he wanted.
With his eyes already closed.
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A/N So did you like it? I'm not one for writing sad things, so I'm not quite sure how it worked out. I felt like a betrayer when Clint died! Who kills off their fav character? Also Natasha's…sorta hard to write? She seemed really OOC. I don't know too much of her character other than from what I've seen in the movies/shows. Let me know what you think!
Does anyone else feel sorta like a creeper when you get an Avengers pic and you squeal and kiss the pic and proclaim your love to it? (rather the people on it). Or is that just me…O.o Or it's maybe a Fangirl thing? Let's go with that :D
Aaaannnd, does anyone else when listening to the song "Monster" by "Imagine Dragons" think of the Hulk? To me it seems as though that song was written just for him.
Please leave a review on your way out! Merci boucoup!
