Howdy everyone, I'm James and I'm going to be your host for... Until I get bored of writing this story.

If you're wondering why this is posted on "MyCrimsonTear"'s account, it's because I'm her boyfriend and I know that if I put it on my own account no one would read it '[

Cookie has lotsa fans and James has none [

Anyway, she made me do it 'cos I had so many ideas I wanted her to put into her stories so she told me to write my own.

This story is my first so bear that in mind while reading... /

Rated M for possible future lemons, bad language etc.

Spoilers and out of characterness too. (Is characterness a word..?)

"So, Shikamaru what's it like living wit h that sand witch?" Kiba slurred after downing his seventh pint.

Shikamaru thought a moment before responding "Not as troublesome as I thought it would be." he then paused a moment before adding" Or how drunk you are every evening..."

"I'm not drunksh" Kiba Giggled before continuing "Mush" and gave a huge grin.

"Come on lets get you home before your mother comes looking for you and finds you like this..." insisted Shikamaru while dragging Kiba through the door by his ear.

"BUH BYE SHIKAMARU AND KEBAB...mmm ...Kebab" Shikamaru heard his best friend, the most overweight ninja in Konaha yelling at him.

"Seeya Choji!" he called back.

Shikamaru took in a deep breath of the fresh night air of Konaha at 2:30 in the morning and grabbed Kiba before he tripped over his own drunken feet.

"Thanksh" Grinned the Too-Drunk-For-His-Own-Good dog boy

"Don't make me put you on a lead" Threatened Shikamaru as he pulled him down the road towards his house.

As Kiba was stumbling down the road he caught the scent of the food his name was often mistaken for.

"Hey Shikamaru can we get some kebabs canwecanwecanwe!??!?!?!?" shouted the dog boy as he bounced around the pineapple haired teen.

"I don't know… it's late..."

"Pleeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeease Shikamaru" Pleaded Kiba while using his well practiced puppy dog eyes.

"You're so troublesome you know that" Shikamaru sighed "Fine..." he conceded "But I'm not paying."

"Yayayayay" yelped the drunken dog as he rushed into the Kebab shop to order himself and Shikamaru two kebabs and a coke to sober himself up a bit.

"My mum'll bite my head off if I go home like this..."Mumbled Kiba through a nervous smile after Shikamaru enquired about the coke.

After the teens were served their kebabs they continued on down the road a little way until Kiba stopped

"Here's my place, cheers for lookin' after me. Seeya round"

"No problem, see you soon" Smiled Shikamaru as he casually walked off down the road.

After he was out of sight of his friends houses Shikamaru broke into a brink jog then a full on sprint.

"She's gonna kill me, she's gonna kill me, she's gonna kill me" He mumbled to himself as he ran up the hill to the house he bought with his newly wedded wife.

"Thank god!" Shikamaru exclaimed as he walked through the gate into the front garden and wasn't assaulted by a group of psychotic Weasel's as he often was when he got in late.

He slowly and quietly opened the door incase 'she' was asleep and crept into the hallway and stood still when she could hear her voice. it was coming from the living room

'She's probably running the phone bill up again talking to her brothers... again!' Shikamaru thought as he took his shoes off.

"I'm home!!" he yelled inside.

"Welcome home!" he heard 'her' call from the living room

'Thank god, she doesn't sound too mad..." Shikamaru thought to himself as he walked through the kitchen into the living room

Temari was lying on the sofa wearing her bathrobe talking on the phone.

"THANK JASHIN YOU'RE HOME! She's been talking to that redhead that was here the other day for hours" complained the disembodied head on the mantle-piece from behind Shikamaru.

"Good morning to you too Hidan" The silvery haired head just humphed and closed it's eyes. Shikamaru was sure he would have turned away... if he had a body to turn away with.

"If you hadn't destroyed my body I would destroy both of you." Hidan said with his eyes still closed.

"Okay, you take care of yourself Gaara; remember to change your underwear. You'll get sand rash if you don't. Okay, bye..." said the sandy haired girl before she hung up the phone and turned to face her husband.

"And JUST where have you been all night!" she demanded at Shikamaru.

"Stopping Kiba from drinking himself to death" Shikamaru responded trying his best not to let her hear his fear.

"That wasn't what I asked."

"I was at the bar"

Temari shot daggers at her husband... Literally.Shikamaru just managed to dodge the kunai's that narrowly missed his head and bedded themselves in the wall, narrowly missing their resident bodiless head.

"DO YOU TWO FUCKING MIND!" Screamed the furious head as several silver hairs flouted past his eyes.Shikamaru used this as a distraction to shadow bind his crazed wife.

"I wasn't drinking; you know I don't unless it's for a celebration"

"Fine!" Pouted Temari still looking very angry

"Calm down and I told you calls to the sand village are ridiculously expensive" Shikamaru said as he released his jutsu.

"Hey, he called ME!" she protested.

"Whatever, lets get to bed, it's late..." He thought again "Early" he corrected while collecting his wife's Kunai from around the angry head.

"Goodnight Hidan" Shikamaru said.

"DIE YOU INCONSIDERATE BASTARD. WHY COULDN'T YOU JUST LEAVE ME IN THE GROUND TO ROT! JASHIN CURSE YOU BOTH!" Yelled the head as Shikamaru put the bag over his head.

Other muffled threats and curses could be heard from within the bag as Shikamaru took his wife's hand and led her upstairs. Temari continued into their bedroom while Shikamaru went into the bathroom to change into his smiley face pajama's and brush his teeth. Once he finished his evening routine he joined his wife in bed.

He wrapped his arms around her and whispered "I love you" into her ear before falling into a peaceful sleep.

Well, let me know what you think.

I know its short, lol. I couldn't think of anything else to add. Next chapter will be longer, I promise -'.

Constructive criticism welcomed.

Don't be too mean... It is my first after all