Grimmosapien Mating Season

Beta: ever_obsessed (LJ)

Characters + Pairing: Nick/Monroe, mentions of Nick/Juliette.

Rating: NC-17 (collectively)


A long day of work had Nick strung out. He was not in the mood to head home quite yet. Still at the station, he sat in his car, knowing his betrothed would have been waiting for him, likely about to throw down a couple of steaks. Juliette's avoidance, her inability to address Nick's ability of being a lightning rod of all things strange and violent, was crippling. She'd been mentioning that she should be prepared with some kind of weapon. Nick wasn't opposed, though it made him a little nervous, but every conversation turning to it... It made it hard to talk about anything.

Nick would not be able to look at her that night. It was a particularly rough day that struck close to his heart. The body of a missing woman was found. Her husband confessed. He admitted he thought she was cheating, snapped, and strangled her, dumping her body near a hiking trail. Later, he'd found her private journal, where she spoke about sonograms and when she should tell him about the pregnancy. That man wept for hours. The dismay and mourn adhered to Nick.

The detective punched a few keys on his phone, reaching a cheerful watch-maker.

"Hey Monroe. You busy?" He tailed his quarry's denial, stating, "Well, I'll be right over. Wear pants."

The Grimm ran his hand across his tipped bangs, smiling confidently. After starting his station wagon, he found it hard to resist breaking the speed limit. Having darted across town to his closest ally, Nick zipped his way up the steps, nearly tripping. His hand barely had time to curl before the door was already open. The Blutbad, pulling off an oven mitt and apron, escorted his junior inside. A pat on the shoulder later, Nick marched inside, sitting at a table lit with fine tapered candles and half full champagne glasses. Plates with hot stuffed eggplant and a tray of meatless lasagna sat steaming on the table.

After a brief explanation of the two dishes, mostly how they were found in a magazine, Monroe poked Nick's plate with a fork. "What's new, man," he inquired.

"Had a rough case today." Nick looked down at his plate. After swallowing a good chunk of aubergine, he mumbled, "I proposed to Juliette, too."

"When?" Monroe slowly placed his fork on the table. "I mean, that's great, but when?"

"You remember the night I came over and babbled about those coins?"

Nervously, the watch-mender spoke, "Dude, that was weeks ago. Why didn't you tell me sooner?"

"I thought you'd... I don't know. I'm not completely happy." The detective's head rose, his eyes meeting the other man's.

Monroe stared for a minute, processing what he just heard. "How are you not happy? I'd be the happiest guy ever in your position."

"Well, it's not that simple." The Grimm continued, "I have a hypothetical situation. It involves a friend, and he needs some advice."

Hesitant, Monroe managed to choke out, "O... kay?"

"This friend. He's married, and I think he loves his wife, but he's also kind of..."

Monroe urged him on, nodding.

"Sort of in love with his best friend."

Monroe stared vacantly at Nick. "And?"

"...And his best friend is a guy?"

Two whole seconds passed before Monroe shot up from the table. His fork flew through the air, landing on the floor. "The other day, you were serious! I thought you were just chatting me up!"

Nick loured, expecting the worst. "Yeah, I should have known to not-"

Triumph in his voice, Monroe interjected, "Use thinly veiled hypothetical situations to confess that you're definitely not an average Grimm? Hoh, man, wow."

Monroe looked up, placing his hands on his hips. "You know, Nick, in retrospect, the tone you used when you asked me if I love Angelina... Way too personal." He squatted to pick up his fork, then briskly walked to the kitchen to retrieve a clean one.

"When did I do that?" Nick said, stabbing a piece of lasagna.

"Months ago. Two-ish, three-ish." Monroe snapped his eyes to Nick. Sitting again, he proudly stated, "So is this a competition? That's really... incredible. I've never been in a spot like this before."

The whiskered man leaned in, grinning. "But you know what's great? I know what my competition looks like. She's good looking, kind of, but she's not that pretty. And does she always do that?"

"Do what," Nick puzzled.

"Look in two directions at the same time."

Nick interjected with a soft but cautionary, "Hey."

"Come on, man, she's like a chameleon. Not that I really possess winning looks, either."

Nick cut into Monroe's jovial words. "That's terrible." He paused a beat. "I think she's hot."

"Yeah, I can see that. In the right light, maybe."

The Grimm rolled his eyes. "Okay, new subject."

The pair quietly downed the last few morsels of the meal. Chewing his final bite of eggplant, the Blutbad beamed a grin. Nick delivered a mischievous smile right back. "So, Monroe... When exactly were you interested in me?"

The scruffy man took a moment to chew and ingest the last bite. "If I'm completely honest with you, I'm pretty sure it was that first time you slammed me against the wall. Remember?"

"First day we met? That early?"

Standing, Monroe began collecting plates and utensils from the table. "Oh yeah," he quivered, slipping into a lewd tone. Carrying the used tools to the sink, he took a moment to recollect himself. Returning for the empty lasagna tray, he connected with Nick's eyes. The detective's curled brow demanded details.

"You know how Blutbaden are known for eating people? Well, that's why no one ever stands up to me. No one ever tries to display dominance over us. It's just... Particularly stimulating to me."

"Really? I had no idea."

"Yeah, that's obvious." After a pause, he resumed, "Oh! I just realized, maybe I'm not in love with you. Maybe I'm just Grimm-o-sexual. You know? And I know no other Grimms, so I can't test that theory."

Nick stewed, "Yeah, I don't think that's a good idea. Remember what we're known for."

"Yeah, yeah, I know. Trust me, I know."

At the sink, the stubbly man began washing dishes. The next few minutes were comfortably silent, but for the roar of running water and scrubbing. Monroe, reaching for a hand towel, turned to face the jet-haired detective. "Okay, dishes are clean. So what now?"

"I was thinking maybe we could spend some time together," the Grimm delightedly spoke. He'd been approaching the Blutbad slowly.

Nick's phone buzzed in his pocket, shrieking. He looked at the photo. "It's Juliette."

After a few apologies, the phone was tucked back into its pocket.

"I forgot to call her. She's pretty worried, so I should get going."

Monroe pursed his lips, disappointedly asserted, "Sure, go ahead. I'll see you around-"

His weak gripe was interrupted by a quick peck on the lips.

Before he had time to react, Nick had already left. The watch-mender's spine idyllically tingled. He blurted out the one thing on his mind.

"Huh. Wow. This is some serious business now, innit."