Slight Obsession
Summary- A boy and his feelings. Sort of different than what I usually write. Short one-shot.
Author's note- Yeah, I know this is sort of a weird story. I was bored. Its short, but hey, life goes on. -Nat
That smile. I look forward to that smile every day. Even though it was never directed towards me, it still makes my heart melt everytime I see it. I never told anyone about this secret of mine. This slight obsession with her. They wouldn't understand what I see in her. If I told them on average how many times she said Harry Potter's name in a day, they'd just laugh in my face. They'd just say we were too different.
You see, that's where they are wrong. We do have something in common. Something vital to our lives. Something that we can't live without, and if we tried we'd just curl up and die. We both care deeply about someone that we cannot approach. I only wish I was that someone to her. But a boy can only dream.
I'd be surprised if she even knew my name. No, scratch that. I'd be the happiest person on the planet if she said my name.
To me, shes the picture of perfection. Shes everything I ever desired. Everything about her is so desirable. The way her hair sticks up even after she probably spent an hour trying to keep it down, the way when shes embarrassed, she has this nervous laugh and she laughs at everything making herself more embarrassed.
I love the fact that shes human. She holds grudges and she gets angry, but she also forgives. She isn't what everyone wants. She doesn't walk down the hallway and have all the girls wishing to be like her and the guys wishing she'd like them. That's my favorite thing about her.
Wouldn't it just be wonderful if she just said hi to me? I'm not asking for anything more than a simple 'Hello' or 'How do you do?'. More Importantly, I want her to notice me. I want her to see what I see in her: That flawed people can be perfect, too.
And how do I know this is true? Well, she has her flaws and I think shes perfect. What does she see in him? What can he give her that I wouldn't be able to? Perfection.
The answer to that question is so easy. I'm everything but perfect.
Maybe one day she'll see me, and think, 'This is who I want to spend the rest of my days with' and she'll forget about him. Or maybe I should approach her. Tell her how I feel.
And what? And make a big fool of myself? So she can tell me how imperfect I am, how I could never be with her because my imperfection is a sin to her? No, I cannot scar her with myself. My inadequate self.
Why am I doing this? I should just go up to the highest tower and fling myself off the side. Yes. That sounds good right about now. Then they can put 'Here lies an imperfect man' on my gravestone. I dropped my books I was holding and ran, making everyone look at me. Stare everyone, go ahead and stare. This is the last time you'll ever see this man, and you can all go back to your unflawed worlds tomorrow.
I looked out the window and down. It was a long fall. But it would feel so good. I wouldn't have to look at her ever again and scar her with my flaws. I'm doing this for you. Maybe I'll see you again one day, in that place they call heaven. Hopefully he saw you for who you were and swept you off your feet. Either way, I heard you can be happy in heaven. That even the flawed are perfect there. And maybe when I see you in heaven, I'll be good enough for you then.
I'm doing this for you.
Author's Note- Eh, yeah. Review please. I'll leave it up to you to decide who the characters are. [Mostly because I couldn't decide who the characters were. ] -Nat
Summary- A boy and his feelings. Sort of different than what I usually write. Short one-shot.
Author's note- Yeah, I know this is sort of a weird story. I was bored. Its short, but hey, life goes on. -Nat
That smile. I look forward to that smile every day. Even though it was never directed towards me, it still makes my heart melt everytime I see it. I never told anyone about this secret of mine. This slight obsession with her. They wouldn't understand what I see in her. If I told them on average how many times she said Harry Potter's name in a day, they'd just laugh in my face. They'd just say we were too different.
You see, that's where they are wrong. We do have something in common. Something vital to our lives. Something that we can't live without, and if we tried we'd just curl up and die. We both care deeply about someone that we cannot approach. I only wish I was that someone to her. But a boy can only dream.
I'd be surprised if she even knew my name. No, scratch that. I'd be the happiest person on the planet if she said my name.
To me, shes the picture of perfection. Shes everything I ever desired. Everything about her is so desirable. The way her hair sticks up even after she probably spent an hour trying to keep it down, the way when shes embarrassed, she has this nervous laugh and she laughs at everything making herself more embarrassed.
I love the fact that shes human. She holds grudges and she gets angry, but she also forgives. She isn't what everyone wants. She doesn't walk down the hallway and have all the girls wishing to be like her and the guys wishing she'd like them. That's my favorite thing about her.
Wouldn't it just be wonderful if she just said hi to me? I'm not asking for anything more than a simple 'Hello' or 'How do you do?'. More Importantly, I want her to notice me. I want her to see what I see in her: That flawed people can be perfect, too.
And how do I know this is true? Well, she has her flaws and I think shes perfect. What does she see in him? What can he give her that I wouldn't be able to? Perfection.
The answer to that question is so easy. I'm everything but perfect.
Maybe one day she'll see me, and think, 'This is who I want to spend the rest of my days with' and she'll forget about him. Or maybe I should approach her. Tell her how I feel.
And what? And make a big fool of myself? So she can tell me how imperfect I am, how I could never be with her because my imperfection is a sin to her? No, I cannot scar her with myself. My inadequate self.
Why am I doing this? I should just go up to the highest tower and fling myself off the side. Yes. That sounds good right about now. Then they can put 'Here lies an imperfect man' on my gravestone. I dropped my books I was holding and ran, making everyone look at me. Stare everyone, go ahead and stare. This is the last time you'll ever see this man, and you can all go back to your unflawed worlds tomorrow.
I looked out the window and down. It was a long fall. But it would feel so good. I wouldn't have to look at her ever again and scar her with my flaws. I'm doing this for you. Maybe I'll see you again one day, in that place they call heaven. Hopefully he saw you for who you were and swept you off your feet. Either way, I heard you can be happy in heaven. That even the flawed are perfect there. And maybe when I see you in heaven, I'll be good enough for you then.
I'm doing this for you.
Author's Note- Eh, yeah. Review please. I'll leave it up to you to decide who the characters are. [Mostly because I couldn't decide who the characters were. ] -Nat
