I KNOW I HAVEN'T WRITTEN FOR DEATH NOTE SINCE FOREVER AGO, BUT I JUST HAD TO WRITE THIS! This is an old game I used to play with my friends a couple years ago. Now that I look back on it, it was pretty twisted. But so is my mind! Mwahahah! Anywho, I do not own the game 'Honey do you love me?' I don't own Death Note, but I do own the plot~! OOC AT THE END!
Please enjoy.
Everything was peaceful. Too peaceful. So filled with peace it was almost boring. No, check that. It was, and is, boring. L closed the files on his laptop and stared at his wallpaper screen. Ah, choclate covered strawberry mountain, how he loved you so. L chewed on his finger nail, thinking of something to entertain his mind. He peered out of the corner of his eye at Light, who was listening to calming music while searching through games on his computer.
L jumped on the back of his chair, causing Light to gasp in surprise. He glared at L's reflection on his computer. "What are you doing Yagami-kun?" L asked, peering over Light's shoulder. "Taking a break..." Light muttered, trying desperately not to hit L. L took his finger out of his mouth, and pointed to a certain link.
"Click that one, Yagami-kun." L commanded Light stared wide eyed at him, before narrowing his eyes and chuckling darkly. "Ryuzaki... That's an old school girls gam-" He was cut off by L's hand on his mouth. Light felt disgusted. Strawberries.
"Click on that link now, or I will throw you in a prison cell, and force you to bath in a pool filled with Mago Juice." L said, his black, beady eyes staring into Light's. "You would throw me into a prison cell and force me to bath in Mango Juice...? Are you serious?" Light asked. L nodded.
"If you don't click on the link I can do worse. I will force you to guest star on Elmo dressed as that one American dinosaur." L was not kidding.
"Barney? Ryu-"
"And ride around on a tricycle singing You Are Kira. Click. On. That. Link." L jabbed his finger at the screen, before Light shot him one more glare, and clicked. "Honey do you love me...?" He read off the screen. "In order to play this game you need a certain number of people, the more the better. One person will have to flirt with another saying the words Honey Do You Love Me? Until they smile, or laugh. If they do not then repeat the phrase, only adding, Honey if you love me, give me a smile... Interesting..." L said as he read off the rules and instructions.
Light simply rolled his eyes, before turning to see what the other task force members were doing. Nothing. ''Hey Ryuzaki, maybe we should get back to work to solve the Kira-" He was cut off. Again.
"I want to play this game," He said. "Play it with me, or I will force you to marry the purple dinosaur."
"Barney."
"Bobby."
"Barney."
"Blacky."
"Barney!"
"Brownies!"
"..."
Once again, a very awkward silence between the two. L turned to the task force, coughing to get their attenting. None. L coughed again.
"Ryuzaki, you might want to get that hairball out of your throat. I'm trying to drink my coffee." Matsuda said. L glared at him. "Perhaps you should get the woodpecker out of your rectum." Silence.
"Excuse me?" Matsuda said, chuckling.
"Matsuda-san, are you gay?"
"...Who the hell told you...?"
Even awkwarder silence. Aizawa chuckled, replying with an "I knew it," before returning to his work. L coughed. "Jeez, Ryuzaki! No hairballs in here!" Matsuda yelled. L glared at him, before talking to Watarti on his walky-talky.
"Bring in the dinosaur."
"But Ryuzaki, he isn't here yet. We only have a blonde model, a homeless man, and 36 tons worth of rootbeer sitting in a truck outside!" Watari said apologetically. L slammed the walky-talky down.
"Alright! We are going to play a game called...," He turned to the computer screen. "Honey do you love me. I don't care if you don't know the rules. I'm bored. Let's play. Matsuda-San, you go first," L said, and sat on a couch staring intently at Matsuda.
"Oh! I played this game when I was in grade school! I was the best at it!" Matsuda cheered.
Awkward slience.
"Matsuda-San, you forgot to include in your Reseme that you were previously a male stripper. Anything else I should know about before we continue?" L raised his eyesbrows. Matsuda thought for a moment.
"Well, I live with my mom-"
"Get out! I've heard enough! Get out of here!" L yelled at him. Matsuda sat down, scared.
"I'll be good." He begged.
"Light-kun, go first." L commanded. Light rolled his eyes, and sat next to his father. "Daddy, do you love me?" He asked. Soichiro laughed, before patting his hand on Light's shoulder. "Of course I love you,son." L brought out a white-board, wrote all the task force members names on it, and crossed out Lights name.
"Light-kun has gone. You laughed Yagaimi-San. Your turn." L smiled a sadistic grin.
"But I don't-"
"Your. Turn." L's tone was deadly. Soichiro stood up, and wandered over to Aizawa.
"Uh, Aizawa-"
"No."
"It's rude to interu-"
"No."
"Just let me ask-"
"Are you stalking me, huh? Do you love me, do you want me? Huh, Huh? Is that your problem? Huh, am I too sexy for you?" Aizawa stood up and got in Soichiro's face. Sweatdrop.
"Next person." L crossed out Soichiro's name. "Aizawa-San, please continue," Ryuzaki asked. Aizawa walked over to Mogi, before turning away and shivering. He walked over to Light.
"Hey, Light-"
"Whatever." Light stood up.
"Light-kun, it isn't your turn. You have to smile."
"I don't want to smile."
"Why not?"
"Cuz Matsuda taste's the rainbow."
"Light-kun?"
"..."
"..."
"Okay, Light-kun...Continue." Light rolled his eye's, before walking over to Mogi.
"Mogi-"
"Oh yes, Light! I love you so~! Marry me~!" Mogi pounced. Soichiro fainted, Aizawa threw up, and Matsuda screamed.
"Quick, Call the police before I taste the rainbow!"
"I'm on it! Don't worry, we'll save you Light!" Matsuda screamed as he dialed the police. L reached into his pocket and took out his ringing phone.
"Hello?"
"..."
"Who is this? Is this some sort of prank? Do you think messing with the police is funny?" L's voice was stern. Light screamed as Mogi began dragging him off.
"SAVE ME, DAMN IT!" L held the phone to his shoulder.
"SHUT UP LIGHT-KUN, I'M ON THE PHONE! Now, calm down Miss. Miss? MISS! GOD DAMN IT SHUT YOUR TRAP, LADY AND LISTEN TO THE POLICE!" L screamed, Matsuda was quiet as he watched Mogi drag Light off. "Alright Miss, what's going on?"
"H-He took Light-kun!" Matsuda said into the phone.
"Nonsesne, Light-kun is right next to me." L turned his head, searching for the boy. "On second thought, where is this event taking place? Uh-huh...Uh-huh..." L wrote the adress for the task force headquartes down as he heard Matsuda say it. L rushed out the door.
"I'll be back!" He said, running out the door. Minutes later, he ran in the room, panting. "Miss...I'm here..." Matsuda still had the phone to his ear.
"Ryuzaki! You never told me you worked for the police!"
"Yes, Miss, I'm a double agent. Now, where's this boy?"
"Isn't it your job to find him?"
"Your taxes only pay for me to show up. I don't have to do shit." L was about to leave.
"Wait! I' give you twenty dollars!" Matsuda took out his wallet.
"Make it ten and you've got a deal."
"Okay!"
"And! And, I get overtime!"
"Sheesh, you cops are so expensive!"
"If you ask me, I call it smart investing." L looked around. "I'll find this boy, even if it costs me your life!"
"Don't you mean your life?"
"Woah, woah, woah. My life isn't worth ten dollars and overtime." L walked around the office, entering another room. He saw Light tied to a chair. L walked up to him, his fingers in the shape of a gun. He whispered to Light in an officail voice. 'Excuse me, miss? Have you seen a boy about your height, lightish brown hair, light brown eyes, and somewhat tan?"
"Mph, mmm, hrmph, mph!" Light said through the tape around his mouth.
"Miss, your going to have to speak cleaer. Have you seen this boy?" L said as he cut the ropes tied around Light's wrists. Light ripped the tape off his mouth, screaming as he did so. "Light-kun!" Ryuzaki exclaimed. "Have you seen this boy?"
Light slapped him in the face.
"Light-kun? Where did that miss go?" Ryuzaki asked. Light stormed out, muttering about quitting and arresting Ryuzaki.
Ryuzaki walked into the room, where Matsuda watched him walk off.
"Good job, officer!" Matsuda said happily.
"Matsuda-San, when did you get here?"
SORRY IF YOU DON'T LIKE IT BUT I DON'T CARE~! ~BeyondTheClouds
