Disclaimer: I own none of the character except for Alana G. They are all modeled off of co-workers at Regal Theaters, Marley Station. This 'mini soap' is meant for fun only and in no way shape or fun is meant to degrade anyone. It just sort of happened one night while I was bored, watching concession one Monday with Chris. Anyway, I love everyone I work with and I love my job at Regal.

A/N: This chapter is not really a chapter, it's just sort of the forward/preface type thing, with all the know-what's and know-how's of the story. (Can't forget the know-who's.) So do enjoy!

Rating: PG-13 (mostly for language, and the potential for affairs, relationships, and violence.)

General Theater

Being the new employee here at Regal has opened my eyes to a whole new world of things. Watch and behold as the drama unfolds here at Regal and do try to hold onto your seats, and possibly your popcorn on this wild ride as you prepare to view: "General Theater."

Character Introduction:

First of all, there's me, Alana. I've been on the scene for a month, actually about five weeks and try to just observe things as they happen, even though everyone treats me like I've been one of them since the beginning of time. And I act like that a lot, and in some ways, I am just like them. "Max" calls me "Dru" because he thinks I look like Dru Berrymore, that's my Australian name anyway. I'm fairly tall, always cheery, at times too cheery says Anthony, and perhaps rather annoying in Annie's eyes, a little chunky with kinda faded blue eyes and all natural blond hair that Ken thinks is super long.

Next is Egg, since he's the first person I met. He hired me after all. But only after being inspired to work here by Leslie. Tall and lanky, with piercing eyes like someone from a teen drama show. He's got good looks and he knows it, although when he wears the hefty black suite jacket, he looks exactly like the General Manager, even though he swears his hair was that style first. He's suspected to have a thing going on with Annie. He's a manager, takes care of the scheduling and is in college to become a pilot.

Annie should be explained next, since she's been mentioned twice but you know nothing about her. Short but very thin and pretty with blonde highlights and layers in her straight brown hair. She wears small, almost horn-rimmed, glasses, and can be very snappy at times, and at other times, the most pleasant person in the world. She gets along with Egg best and is also a manager. But she has a small problem with her need for designer underwear and using her credit card to get it. She's very friendly and selective, very decisive in what she says and makes for a very good manager.

Next comes Melissa, a manager ready to graduate from college. She only works matinee shift except when she's forced to work in the evenings. She swears it's a completely different breed of people on nightshift and dreads having to work them. She's tall and thin with a pale freckled complexion and strawberry blonde hair. She constantly leaves her keys on the door podium and talks with Ken a lot.

After Melissa comes Carley, the last of the female managers. She's very short with raven black short hair and proportioned to her height but still could catch the gentleman's eye with ease despite being married. Her Dana and Juan are tight but she's mostly seen, not heard and very mysterious. Her hair is very soft and she loves to be tickled, off the clock.

Now with all the female managers out of the way, we move to the guys. Ken is the most important, being general manager. He's good looking with natural tan glowing skin and spiky hair, reminds most of us of a thirty-something Ken doll. Happily married with a toddlerish son, he spends most of his time at the theater but does enjoy the occasional drink. When leaving, he always slips out the back through theater number five and has much respect for all of his employees. He doesn't let his position as manager get to his head. When someone under him is working door, and a show gets out, he'll tell them to stay on door while he goes and cleans, as do the other managers like Jackson, Anthony and Egg. Overall he's cool but totally uptight about neatness, but hey somebody's gotta do it! And beware of "the eyebrow" it's the strangest look that only he can do and wow does it leave you thinking when he does it. He's also a little leery about putting things up on the freshly "purple" wallpapered wall, he picked the color himself.

Next in command, Egg aside is Jackson. While being just a year younger then Ken, he looks a bit older then him and is second in the chain of commands. The films and computer systems at the theater despise him, since they always seem to have a problem on his shift. He's an interesting character who get upset over things easily, but never takes it out on his employees. He's the kind of guy that when a light bulb is out, he won't tell someone to do it, he'll just go and change it himself. He takes care of all the problems even if at times they aren't his fault or his job. He moonlights, rather daylights part time at the local Home Depot. And even though he's a great guy, he always seems to have a not so happy day because of problems at work.

There's Kermit H. He's the older concession manager. Tall and stout, he hides his weight well with his height (which is still being debated upon between Elliot, Crash, Alana and him. Assuming that Elliot is 6 foot tall, Crash is 5'11 he is 5'10.5 and Alana is 5'10) with glasses, plaid dress shirt and tie. Don't let the appearance fool you. He's no geek, accept for when it comes to Roller Coasters. He's crazy over them, but if you've got to pick something to be crazy over, he picked a good one. He works most weeknights, and the occasional weekend, and is very knowledgeable about random things. Always counting stocks at concession, he sometimes messes them up and is semi strict with the rules. Although he does pocket AirHeads just like the rest of us. He's very good about carrying on conversations while counting and is very nice, and has a very interesting sense of humor.

Warren is the resident Santa Claus, physically and literally. Hefty fellow with rosy cheeks, a cherry nose, snowy white beard and a rather round stomach. He always wears bright red suspenders and glasses. Little is known about his managerial duties, except that he shows up on Sundays to open the theater and then disappears to the upstairs. A very friendly fellow, he changes the films and jokes around with Elliot a lot.

Jeffrey is the mysterious Thursday man who pops in just long enough to assemble the trailers to the movies. Scruffy with his goatee, baseball cap and dark eyes, he's rather quiet and spend most of his time upstairs as well.

Another one-day manager is Bob Kelly. Rather fond of Annie, he only shows up on Sundays. He keeps a low profile and tends to be a "stick to the rule" man as well. Elliot tends to steal his nametag when he's not around since all the managers get special golden magnetic nametags. Bob has a bit of a country accent, sounding like he's from Virginia even though he says he's from South Glen Burnie. He helps people out when needed and comes up to see movies late at night not caring what time they say they started, he just wants to know exactly when the real picture starts showing.

Anthony was just recently promoted to manager and is hilarious. He's large and in charge, with a baby face and glasses, always laughing about something. He's been with the theater for three years and has a relationship with Leslie that makes everyone wonder if it's a boyfriend girlfriend or just friends deal. He's all around friendly and loves to jump out from around corners and doorways and scare people. He definitely thinks Alana is excessively cheery at times, but non-the less, is cool. He reminds some of us of Keenan Thompson from Keenan and Kel.

Lastly for managers is Elliot. He too was just recently promoted. He looks like he's 24, but is only 18 and totally hot. Sometimes he wears glasses, sometimes he doesn't. He runs concessions and films and definitely has a dirty mind at times. He always wants the ladies to work late with him and wears nice clothes, though he hates the thought of getting butter stains on them. While in the office, he has no objections to any ladies who wish to sit on his lap while in the big boss's chair. He's really sweet, but a big time practical joker and definitely not a jock from his high school days. He has several leather jackets that he wears and loves bands that would perform at HFS.

Now meet the rest of the crew:

Feather is a high school graduate who is short with fluffy red hair and a very flattering figure. She dates Juan but is smoking her life away with over a pack a day, she says it's the menthol and that it calms her nerves, but it's really just killing her lungs. She works concession, and calls everyone sweetie and can often be found "taking out the garbage" so she can smoke a cigarette. She's very playful and loves everyone.

Juan, tall lanky and very thin is rather quiet. He's quite the goof who likes hanging around with Alex B. and Crash. He's often on shift with his girl and is always play fighting with Tim, they like to play fight while cleaning out the theaters and this often makes Annie mad. Overall he's pretty cool, and always gets a ride home with Feather.

Tim is a quiet usher, in fantasy land perhaps. He and Juan like to fight in the back room but he's always on top of what movies get out when and when the next one starts. Or at least he pretends to be so that the managers don't notice. Mostly a slacker, he takes long breaks and is hardly dependable to show up for work, even when he's scheduled.

Crash, aka "Max" in Australian, is one very odd fellow. But he's funny and has a gorgeous voice. He's tall and perfectly built with shock blonde hair that has a zigzag chunk part in it. He reminds you of someone from American idol and started the whole "Australian" thing. He works everything, from concession to box to usher and then some. He's nineteen and has been there for a while. Definitely a big fan of women, he's very ticklish right in the ribs and is a big time supporter of Anthony's scaring people, goofing off with the ladies, as well as all other theatrical nonsense. He's writing his own novel, a horror story because he loves Freddie Crugar and the Halloween series. He's working really hard to get back in shape since he thinks he needs it, and shaves his arms and legs.

Alex B. is a dark skinned usher. So much so that Crash and Juan call him "Mowgli" like the kid from the jungle book, to tease him. He's rather quiet himself but likes a good laugh and has had the great misfortune of Elliot's pervertedness rubbing off on him. He dates Gwendolyn who just recently came back to the theater. He's very nice, as are everyone at the theater and likes to goof off just as much as Crash and Juan do.

Then there's Alex L. He's a tiny little fellow who is really cool, looks like he just came off permanent time Bay Watch. He often works box but can sometimes be put into place as soda boy on concession when things get hectic. He's a big time joker but totally sweet, or so it would seem. He's always running around telling new employees that other employees want their number. As if there weren't enough drama, he just tried to create a bit more of his own. Rumor has it that he's a 'user/loser' just trying to get into the girl's shorts. But how could someone who looks so innocent be so mean. After all, it is just a rumor…right?

Gwendolyn just recently came back to the theater but has worked here for over a year. She's a very sweet girl, medium height, medium build with a straight smile and straight brown hair. She dates Alex B. and likes almost everyone there. Always on concession she does her job, is a hard worker and is good friends with Feather. She tries to help out the new employees so they can get in the swing of things quicker.

Dana, though quiet, cannot be forgotten. She's about the sweetest girl you could ever hope to meet. She's very quiet, but that could just be because we're all so loud. Very pale and thin, with red hair and freckles, she likes acting and theater. She often works box but can be found occasionally behind concession. She's funny and very sweet, everyone loves her.

Kristina is also a very sweet girl. While looking for another job, she remains loyal to the theater and always works with her best effort. She's sweet, and funny and well liked. She's short with long brown hair and very pretty defined facial features. She's usually at concession, and would switch with anyone for scheduling conflicts. She's been there a long time and is all round great.

Then there's Berry. They call him "Berry the Tooth" because of his one out of place tooth. He's an amazingly nice guy even if he will give the new workers a rise every once in a while. He's always joking around, and works Box and on occasion door. He works almost every day and is very nice, just like everyone else.

Elaina, not to be confused with Alana, though was hired and trained in the same night, is a very pretty sophomore. She's young and a hard worker, looking for extra hours. Though she's having some personal problems with her former boyfriend, she doesn't let it get her down. She's always on concession and gets along well with people like Jan and Jezebel. Crash thinks she's totally hot and would "do her in a heartbeat" if she weren't so young. She often hangs around after work to just 'chill' with the boys and fits right in with the rest of the theater chics. She's always begging to work a weeknight, and when she finally gets it on the schedule, she can't do it.

Leslie, of course, is not to be forgotten about. She's very pretty, even if she is vertically challenged, long straight black hair and a total sweetie. She often works box and door and is very close with Anthony. She took him to her senior prom. She's also recently been hired by a knife company and may or may not be leaving the theater. Everyone, however, would be very sad to see her go.

Carrie-Ann is a tan blonde who is at the theater even when she isn't working! She's a sweet girl who works concession and is always smiling, even at the end of a long and tiring day. She's very laid back and has the most amazing Austrailian accent when she tries it on. Very hard working she smiles all the time and is just an awesome person.

Then there's Andy. He only works weekends and door to boot. His biggest job is selling promotional stars for charity. But he met his match when Alana came to town. Now he makes it a constant competition between the two of them. Everyone at the theater gets highly annoyed with him very quickly. D.J. decided to call him 'Skippy' because it really annoys him, so naturally everyone started calling him Skippy. Everyone severely dislikes him and are hunting for a way to fire him, but unfortunately have not found it yet.

Wreath is a returning veteran to the theater, having gone away for the school year, he's back in action. Totally sweet but doesn't like to work much. He once took well over an entire hour to go out and change the marquee sign. He's friendly and funny, and works usher and door. He comes up to the theater to hang around with Jake and Crash, and loves girl pop music.

Nelly is also a returning veteran to the theater, again medium height and medium build, with a soft tan and wispy blond hair, she's rather quiet but very friendly and watches door.

Another new face to the scene is Jezebel H. She works door and is friendly, though young. She's mostly quiet but very funny. Once she was carrying an entire bag of pretzel bites back to the fridge and the bag had a hole and she spilt them all over the floor. She'd do anything for anyone, including ask embarrassing questions to managers, although she does get embarrassed when trying to purchase thongs from New York and Company.

Aside from her is Jan. She works concession and gives out free refills on everything. Another total sweetie but young one. She dates Jake, but doesn't know why since she claims she doesn't love him. Her idea of a good time is doing all the things that could get you in trouble. (Isn't it all of our idea of a good time?) She also thinks that people should mind their own business and keep their personal lives at home, despite the fact that Jake calls her all the time when she's working and he's not.

Grint is short and thin with short-cropped hair but a great smile and dedicated worker. He takes no shit from no one and works on concession at times, but mostly usher. He's on top of things, if you need popcorn, he's got at your bin before you can say "Hey Grint I need more popcorn." He's a joker just like the rest of the boys at the theater, but the blanket statement that covers that one is 'boys will be boys.'

Jake is new to the scene jokes around a lot for being only sixteen. He claims he hates the job and never takes the blame for anything, even though it is his fault at times. He developed Alana's nickname of tampon and swears he's going to die his hair "Menstrual Flush Red." He really wanted to get fired one time and made an idle threat to kiss Annie just to get her to fire him. He insists on writing up a "chore-list" when he's closing with someone on concession and refuses to do hard jobs once there. He's mostly just talk and hot air because he's harmless and wouldn't hurt a fly, if a little crazy and easily distracted.

Other characters include, Sandy and Patrice who work box. (If any have been forgotten, it's because I haven't met them, or worked with them. Someone tell me and I'll add them.)

And then of course, there's the resident bum. "Clyne" he hangs around the theater, looking for Elliot and Kermit. Both consider him to be like a stalker, because he just hangs around looking for them trying to bum free movies off them. He's kinda scruffy looking with a long gray beard and balding head.

The Setting:

The Lobby: A big tiled entranceway to the theater, is the place for most customer problems, and the occasional issue with ushers or managers. It's the hub of commotion on any given weekend night. Concession: Behind the counter is where all the magic, aka chaos, happens. The floor is always slick with soda, melted ice, butter and god only knows what else so it's like an ice rink trying to move around. The hotdog machine is nasty and no one wants to touch it, while the sodas squirt and spill and the butter machine splatters and hits you in the eye. The greatest conversations take place back there. The Back Room: All the stocks for concession are kept back there, as well as mops brooms and the schedule. The best fights happen here and many just "hang" there on their break. The floor there is also always soaked from either the overflowing drain, melted ice or the mop. The Office: A locked purple door takes you into the office that only managers have keys to. Three desks, three chairs and all sorts of files and a computer. Reports are signed there, money is counted there, and surveillance cameras are there too. Stars, schedules and the like happen there as well as much goofing off. The Podium: The ticket holding box, aka the Door person's home for the evening. It sits just outside the office and holds the tickets, star money, keys to the bathroom supplies, air freshener, most lost and found items, mylars, flashlights and the movie schedules. The Film Room/Upstairs: All the bathroom and other kitchen supplies are kept upstairs as well as all the films and projectors. A great place for any lady to be alone with Elliot while "working late" or a wonderful place for Anthony to pop out and shout "Boo." Either way, it's kinda dark and just slightly mysterious. The Girls Bathroom: Not a big scenery place, just constantly a mess, constantly in need of cleaning and supply changes, and always a problem with some sort of plumbing apparatus. The Theater Hallway: A long carpeted hallway that leads to each of the eight theaters, not important for much aside from cleaning, and changing mylars. Theater #1-4 & 6-8: All average size small theaters, the place where all the usher's clean and the actual movies are viewed. Theater #5: The biggest theater in the house, the one with the most mess, the most goofing off during cleaning, the most problems when it comes to movie viewers and the one with the biggest emergency exit. The Dumpsters Via Theater #5: The hang place when Feather needs a smoke break, or when the trash needs taking out and can only be accessed through theater #5.

Now that you've got the low-down on the who and where. Enjoy the first chapter of "General Theater."